Lucid dreaming hates me

This has always been my problem.. I know one of the main ways to 'take over' your dreams and control them is to know you're dreaming while you're dreaming.

There have been a bunch of times where I realize in my dream that I'm dreaming.. but I wake up every time.
People in my dreams even lie to me, they tell me i'm not dreaming and that it's all real.. but in those dreams it's people I personally know telling me this, so I know they're lying. I can see it in their face.

So what can I do? My dreams are usually like a movie.. I watch myself from 1st person. It's like real life, I just react to things that happen. But once I question if it's real, and find out the truth.. I wake up.
One winter I was thinking of my summer cottage a lot.. then I had a dream about my mother and I eating rice (random) at the dinner table there... I ask her.. "mom am I dreaming?". She just looks at me, then looks back down at her bowl as if she didn't want to tell me. I asked her a few more times, then I realize she doesn't want to break the news that I am dreaming... so then I wake up.

How can I fix this!?!? Do I just need to keep thinking "dont wake up if you know its fake" before bed? As this really sucks because I want to explore my dreams more.

Halp.

PS. Another example about the extent of this is about my dog. The dream was about my 14yr old dog who died a year ago.. in the dream he was just chillin with me and I had my arms around him. As I realized that it's not real and I was asking myself "how is he here?", i wake up , but between dreaming and consciousness as I'm waking up, I feel him deflating in my arms until he is no longer.. my arms deflated until they were at my chest.. and i woke up in the exact position of that. Even while awake I could still feel how my arms had 'changed' positions and that something was just on my chest.. It's like he's still alive in my mind.

I never ask my dream characters for confirmation.
Mostly my dreams are so silly or just something I would never do that I am aware that I am dreaming. I find myself in strange situations. Sometimes I dream about places that don't exist any more, such as my childhood home that burned down. Whenever I see that, it is very real, but I know it is a dream because I can't be back home, it is gone forever.

I see my old pets that died. Sometimes it is very real and I have to remind myself that the cat can't be there because he died years ago. It doesn't stop me from petting him though. I can feel his fur and everything, but I know he is dead and I am just dreaming him.

Sometimes I tell my dream characters that I know I am dreaming, and sometimes I get a funny reaction out of them, especially if I start flying around or doing something I am not supposed to be able to do.

I can never seem to really think of what to do once I do realize I am dreaming. I have read about other people who say they wish they could go lucid, but whenever I am lucid I can't think of what to do with it.

So give me some ideas of what to dream about. I can never think of anything very creative when I am lucid.

I would get the most absurd, blatant clues that I was dreaming and still shrug it off, people in my dream would grab me and say YOU ARE DREAMING and I would laugh in the dream and say "I wish" and then wake up and realize I had been. Very frustrating.

Anyway, the best tip I ever got... if you normally go to bed at 10 and get up at 7, set your alarm for 3, get out of bed (very important) and do something for half an hour to an hour, than go back to sleep. I don't know why this works so well but it does, for some reason I'm far more likely to become lucid this way (AND not wake up immediately when I do).

Also, I have had some dreams where for a few minutes I am very aware I am dreaming. In that time I have a chance to think about what to dream about, but for some reason I always seem to just go along with whatever I am already doing, even thought it is just boring.

One time I thought about the Sphinx and wanting to see that, and it seemed to be working.
Most of the time I seem to devote a lot of energy trying to get places in my dream. Like I will physically try to walk or fly some place. By the time I get to where ever it is I wanted to go, I feel drained. I literally feel tired in the dream, if that makes any sense.

I've reminded myself in a dream once to just focus on where I want to go instead of trying to get there. I mean, in a dream you think you are walking some place, but you really are just creating the scenery around yourself. So you don't have to physically move to get some place.

Only I keep forgetting that and I always try to drive or walk or fly myself some place.

I can fly in my dreams, but it seems like it is draining sometimes to do that. Like I can only go so high or so far and I have to stop. It is really weird how that is.

I used to practice lucid dreaming i rarely get them anymore although i stopped practicing the techniques. While awake ask yourselves as many times as you can am i dreaming. Try to link this question to things you do regularly like look at your watch or draw a ? mark on your hand. Im afraid i have no advice how to stay asleep once you realise that you are dreaming.

When I realise I am lucid I always try and fly, normally successfully I never reached space though which was always my ultimate goal to sore among the stars, I could only get to certain heights or I would sometimes be flying around a room and getting trapped on a ceiling.

I want a machine and a sedative like the film Inception, pure creation from the mind now that would be cool and trippy

Peace

reply to post by MurrayTORONTO


Its all about repetition in the real world. I like to just think of lucid dreaming often, and usually I'll think about it in the dream, then I become lucid. Thats my trick.

Maybe yours is different. If the normal techniques aren't working, (checking your hands, MILDs, WILDs, and journaling) Then use your own strong point to help you dream.

My strong point is thinking, I think about things for long periods of time, so in a dream I usually begin thinking. Then I eventually think about lucid dreams and then it happens.

reply to post by MurrayTORONTO

i have had this happen before in dreams as soon as you wake up try to hold onto your dream and when you fall asleep again you may go back to that dream. i have done this before with some sucess

I took a weekend class years ago with Stephen LaBarge at Stanford Univ. in Palo Alto, Ca. I learned a great deal about lucid dreaming and it has helped me ever since. I think the most important thing I learned that weekend, was to learn to become completely aware in our waking day to day life. Thereby, once we adopt this habit of mindfulness in our waking life, we naturally take this habit into our dream life.

Our first day in class, we were give a piece of paper and told not to look up or around the room and to immediately write down all the oddities we noticed in the room. Of course, not being fully aware of my surroundings, I initially missed many things, i.e. the clock being upside down, etc. It was just a little demonstration of how truly unconscious we all really are.

I notice when I have a lot of stress in my life, I don't have as many lucid dreams. It takes a great deal of relaxation to get me to that state. Although Dr. LaBarge was an expert on Lucid Dreaming, he did not believe in OBEs. he believes they are just another type of lucid dream. However, I have never agreed with him on this point. I have found that when I get into a lucid dream and I become aware that I am dreaming, I usually can switch to an OBE.

I did discover something about my lucid dreams that happens quite often to me when I am dreaming. When I am dreaming, It is like I have this agenda that I am trying to fulfill, but I can't quite remember what it is. For example, in one of my dreams, I am trying to leave my body, but I am not quite clear on this or I don't quite remember that this is my intent. So I am suddenly dancing on a large dance floor doing ballroom dancing. I have a partner and I tell the partner, I only have time for one dance because there is something important that I have to do, although I can't quite remember it. The dance is finished and I want to continue on with what it is I need to do, but then another person wants to dance with me and they are insistent. I am annoyed, but I agree to one more dance. The dance ends and again another person wants to dance. This continues on and on and on, then finally I realize what is happening. They are trying to keep me from my journey and I realize they are sabotaging my efforts to leave my body. Upon this realization I push my partner away as hard as I can, and instantly I am out of my body.

This distraction method by some character in my dreams is quite a common theme. One day I discussed this with a fellow lucid dreamer and he told me what I was encountering was real and that these beings or persons in my dreams are called elementals. He told me that they do that to keep a person from leaving their bodies because they feed off of one's energy while we sleep. It is interesting, because just the other night I had a similar dream where I was traveling to get "some where" and this individual kept detaining me and keeping me from my travels. I became so frustrated in the dream that I finally again, realized what was happening and the minute I did, I left my body and the entire reality changed. So the secret really seems to be to learn to pay attention to every detail so that one becomes completely aware of one's intent in the dream. It is a trip, but the potential is really unlimited. Has anyone else noticed this same similar theme occurring in their dreams?

Originally posted by MurrayTORONTO
People in my dreams even lie to me, they tell me i'm not dreaming and that it's all real.. but in those dreams it's people I personally know telling me this, so I know they're lying. I can see it in their face.

It's probably not people you know, but other entities impersonating them. That happens all the time.

Once you are aware that you are dreaming, it's game over for those who wish to trick you. That's probably why they end the dream.

How can you lucid dream? How can you even question yourself?
When I dream, which is not very often- I'd say... once every month?, I just watch it like a movie, no thoughts no nothing. Just plays like a movie and I wake up. Is there anyway to fix that?