I had an epiphanic moment recently, as memories from long ago came forth. This moment explained why my world view differs greatly from that of my brother and sister.

To make this understandable, it is best to have some context. What world view do my siblings have and where does mine differ? Why would such deviance matter? Who are the players on what stage?

All my life, since I was a very young child, I looked at things and didn’t understand why they are as they are. Somehow I knew that there was technology available that would easily make things better for all. Yet I didn’t see anything out there in the public domain that suggested much that this technology – which somehow my heart took for granted – was anywhere.

Knowing that it, whatever it was, existed – this wonder tech – I never really stopped to ask myself why I was so certain, but that I felt the sea of energy in which I swim and knew taps of some sort could be built to convert it into work for us (I wanted to say “Us,” meaning you, too, any whose eyes see this, but it looks pretentious and I don’t mean to be so). I knew this sea could be tapped.

But my siblings believe in the Einsteinian, entropic vacuum universe with no possibility of energy output greater than – or even equal to (unity) – the input. They do not believe in this “free” energy.

Because I wanted to know why the tech my heart said was there wasn’t bringing a Roddenberryesque world into being, I searched through and correlated a lot of scientific and government information over the years and suspect the Disney world view, where everyone with a good heart will succeed if they work hard and the government is there to protect us, is off the mark. And I knew that my view was tied up somehow with my father.

The epiphany came forth as a culmination of events which all started when my husband found a copy of Secrets of Antigravity Propulsion at a library book sale and brought it home. Eagerly, I read the content, which, amongst other things, documents the science of electrogravitics (I knew I had heard of that before…) in the 1950’s and its disappearance into black ops somewhere around late 1959, early 1960. The book named the company my father worked for, as an aerospace electrical engineer, as being one of the companies heavily involved in exploring this science.

In a flash, as I contemplated the fact that my father (who passed away in 1996) must have known more than he spoke of to us kids, I remembered him excitedly describing the world of the future: it would have cars that floated, houses that floated, even. There would be free energy, and we would visit the planets and the stars. I recalled him trying to explain what made things float… I was around two years old – early-1959ish – and really couldn’t grasp what he was explaining, but I saw vividly the future he described. There was also a slightly later memory, more of an auditory recollection with a dark silhouette of…someone else. It was brief and I was being told that for now what we had talked about was a secret and to not talk about it and to just forget about it. (I guess I did just that…)

My sister, born in 1959, never had our father show her what the future could be. My brother, born in 1961, didn’t either. But I have always carried a deep knowledge that things are not as they could/should be. My recollection explained why this has been so, as well.

Today, because of this, my siblings see me as being delusional in believing in overunity (getting more power out of a system than was put in to start it) – which, in some configurations, is a product of electrogravitics. They think I’m crazy to have involved myself with an inventor who is working on overunity devices. They only have a vague belief in black ops, and likely see things there only a little more advanced than what we see in the public sector. They believe the lies that are used to keep the black ops black.

And I made the one mistake of my life and sent my beloved daughter to live with my sister when we (her father the inventor and I) found ourselves homeless. Had I known that they misperceived so much – to the extent that they accuse my inventor of being abusive – I would never have made the mistake. In my inventor I saw a tender, good natured father, who taught and teased with a smile and deep love. There was one incident – which took place during a particularly bad time in our lives – that everyone knows about because he feels so badly about his choice of behaviors and admits to it in very remorseful terms. He was frustrated and took our daughter at the neck and pushed her down. Immediately he was horrified at his actions and vowed never to behave like that again.

But abusive? Hardly.

The people who saw our family together on a frequent basis all were full of admiration at how we were raising our daughter. We both were often complimented on our patience and willingness to listen to what she had to say. They were amazed at how rational she was and counted us very lucky to have her – as do we.

Now that we are stable (the condition we all agreed must be met before our daughter was returned) and have asked for our daughter back, my sister is opposed and will not send her back to us. I have to wonder if we would be having such issues if my inventor and I were not believers in free energy, government secrecy, and so on. Perhaps being a member of AboveTopSecret.com is enough in their minds to suspect me of being paranoid and/or unstable. (I have linked many of my posts here for their information.)

And maybe it’s my megalomania in believing that I can change the planet for the better by promoting the abundance paradigm. Their stumbling block, of course, is that it requires black ops tech which they don’t really believe exists. Now, having had the memories crop up of my dad trying to explain electrogravitics, and having seen the fundamental equivalence of money and energy, and seeing what the world could look like with this tech, seeing a solution – I have two options. I can either crawl into a hole and hope someone else solves the problems of the world, or I can take up the cause. And for my daughter’s sake, I cannot leave it to a hypothetical savior.

And, whereas before I was baffled that my siblings did not share my certainty – having the same father, after all – that free energy existed…now I understand why they do not. I can only hope that they come to see what I have seen and understand that we are not the “weirdoes” that they credit us with being, and that we are equally capable of raising our child into a strong and healthy adult. Since we cannot afford an attorney, may my sister choose to return our daughter to our loving and capable arms without a court battle.

EDIT: Not sure I have this in the right forum...

Do you want others to continue the tale, or is it a stand alone? If you want others to continue the story, you are in the right forum. If it is stand alone, you need the short story forum.

Thanks, Mods. Not sure why I chose the other forum.

Anyone with additional comments?

I guess there are no more comments...

I was really hoping for advice or help or something. [sigh]

maybe bad karma separated you which was the actions of your husband which also could not be his fault but just lack of understanding in being the father.

where in your area is there good karma ? seek it out and find it... it will give you back the light of your life.

Now that is amazing.
I have had the same type of experience
When i was at school, i was thinking all kinds of impossible things, mostly on how to make them possible.
One day the teacher asked us what we wanted to do when we grow up (i must have been 8 or 9).
So i told him, i was going to work with big machines, magnets, lasers, Maybe build a spaceship.
He said; 'Don't be so silly, you are never in your whole life ever going to get your hands on a laser, stop dreaming'
I have at least 7 lasers right now, not counting the ones in the DVD etc
Got the magnets, too. The spaceship is still on paper

I have a neice who's mad as a bat and she gets to educate her son (my cousin) at home, the boy has zero social skills & is becoming mad as a bat, too.
Gets me mad, but there's nothing i can do (i keep telling her husband he's a bloody fool to let it happen).
Unfortunately, so many people believe in the lie, most of them won't admit it even as the masonry starts falling...

I really would have liked to have met your father