Child Support -- Vendetta Against Males

reply to post by MikeNice81


Well, it does happen. I once appeared in court in front of a very good friend's father. I was clearly in the right, and the other party was clearly in the wrong, and even the police testified on my behalf. I think the judge was so concerned with being "impartial" to me, that he found in favor of the other party despite the facts! It was a fairly minor incident, so I didn't appeal it, but I was stunned.

Judges are human, they have their own preconceived notions, etc. Also, the laws are pretty clear, so it is true that a lawyer can't do anything he couldn't do for himself, BUT lawyers already have repoir with judges, and lawyers already know how to navigate the clerk of courts and the filing procedures, and lawyers already know all the possible things to do. It is still worthwhile to get a lawyer. Preferably one with a good golf game and some drinking stories so that the judges keep him in their good graces and vice versa!

Good luck. You know your friend better than us, but from the outside looking in, it is hard to believe the word of a music guy sleeping on his office couch and showering at a church over a family judge that deals with this stuff day in and day out. Not trying to take sides or make any judgements, just giving you a look from outside your personal relationship. If the judge chooses a felon-stripper over your buddy, then something isn't right somewhere, but maybe it is the judge? Maybe the stripper has some dirt on him?

reply to post by Ausar


Too bad that the rest of us live in a world where religious decrees and reality are not compatible.



If the OP's ex bothers him so much and he's personally witnessed her trying to defraud the system, then he should report it, not come on here and complain about it. Unless there's actual evidence that she's spending the money on herself, it's wrong to accuse her of it since that's libel.

My brother's ex doesn't pay child support and my parents and the parents of the other man she was with are the ones who raise her kids.

reply to post by The Sword


For the record, there are cases where BOTH parents pay child support! If soneone else is raising the kids. Say a grand-parent, or Foster care, or the state, then both parents have some responsibility to help take care of that child!

reply to post by getreadyalready


Up here in BC when our version of the communist party ran the province in the 1990, they were so deep in the redfems pockets it was amazing.

For example they enacted provincial law that when the cops were called for a domestic, the man was to be removed from the house for a night in jail REGARDLESS of any evidence they discovered upon attending.

Further, a couple of Masters of the Court I know (junior judge) told me that by the end of the 1990's over 90% of the initial divorce applications they ruled on contained at least a hint of sexual abuse against the child, and or spousal abuse - and sometimes much worse. Why? For the obvious reasons and the fact the courts imposed ZERO penalties against a woman when it was shown she was an outright liar.

Matters have arrived back on earth, though, and it all started - strangely - after a woman was appointed as the head of our Supreme Court. Then again, she is a no non-sense Alberta woman, whereas the previous women who sat on the SCC were nothing short of RABID radfems out of Ontario who clearly hated men.

reply to post by getreadyalready


Well, in that case, it's not happening at this point.

I could ask my parents how much money they've gotten from the mother of their grandchild and they will probably tell me ZERO, ZILCH, and NONE.

reply to post by leo123


My hometown in Missouri had that law. If the police came out for a domestic, they always took the man to jail, no exceptions. Recently it has changed to where they always take "someone" to jail. Usually it is still the man, but I do know of several woman that spent the night in jail after calling the cops themselves. (One kicked the cop when he told her to shut up for a minute, LOL!)

I think it is supposed to cut down on frivolous calls, and also reduce liability if the police leave and somebody gets killed later that night.

reply to post by getreadyalready


The problem is that it happens more than once in a while. A lot of family court judges are pro-woman to the point of bias. According to certain studies in 85% of "custodial parents" are women. The courts still routinely side with the woman regardless of evidence and force the man to fight through months, or even years, of legal appeals.

This was recently highlighted by the case of an ohio man. He had an affair with a married woman. Her husband disevowed paternity and she gave it up for adoption. The biological father filed for custody and won. However the adoptive parents refused to turn over the child. Despite a court order it took the father three years and several trips to the Ohio supreme court to get the order enforced. Now the adoptive parents are claiming that, since they are the only parents the three year old knows, it would be disruptive to turn the child over. So, now he may be headed back to court yet again to fight another round of appeals. All the ehile he has still been denied the right to take custody of his child.

Men who fight for custody are drug through the mud and grim in ways that most women will never experience.

Originally posted by getreadyalready
I think it is supposed to cut down on frivolous calls, and also reduce liability if the police leave and somebody gets killed later that night.

Makes sense.

reply to post by MikeNice81


In my work it is nowhere near 85%. It is the majority, but it isn't nearly 85%. It is suprisingly closer to 60/40. I will look for a more accurate representation and bring it back.

I agree that the battle for a father is much more heated, but I contend that there should be no battle at all! Why would any one parent want to limit access to the other parent? 50/50 custody and smaller child support payments should be the norm. Too bad that isn't the case very often, but it should be the goal of the whole system!

And, to support what someone said earlier. Child Support has nothing whatsoever to do with Custody Battles, or Spousal Support, or Divorce Decrees. The only thing Child Support agencies enforce is the order for child support after everything else is said and done. It doesn't matter if someone is not getting the visitiation they were promised, that is not part of the Child Support order, that is a separate order.

Originally posted by logicalthinking
reply to post by Hefficide

 

Im not putting my child in the middle of this. Again the way the system is set up in my area, the judge is a man hating lesbian, this is a well known fact. Im not complaining about paying the child support. My concern is knowing where the money goes. There is not system in place to protect the monetary part of the what the child recieves. Also, it is damn near impossible, because of the judge, to get custody of my child. The mother of my daughter is all about herself, she was the one using my daughter as leverage. She did not file for child support and yes i was paying, until i got into another relationship a fathered a daughter with my fiance, thats when she went and got a pfa, with no abuse, mental or physical, against me to keep my daughter away from me. I went to court denied the allegations, because they were false, i swore on the bible, the judge said that they would have to question my 3 year old daughter in further court proceedings. I did not want to get my daughter involved in this so I denied them to do so. I dont want my daughter remembering going and having been asked if daddy beat her, it breaks my heart. So now I have to take parenting classes, with a bunch of degerates to even see my daughter by myself. Again the abuse allegations were lies to get back at me for starting a new relationship with a wonderful woman. I can also not go hunting for three years or own guns for that matter, one of my favorite things to do because my ex said that she felt that I would kill her. Again NO PHYSICAL OR MENTAL abuse had ever happened, no police records, nothing, this was becuase of the man hating judge. I am now treated like a criminal and a terrible father because my ex got jealous. The system is corrupt!

Wow do you live in new jersey, by chance? LOL don't answer I am really not trying to find out just that's the state in which my partner's corrupt ex B**** is dealing through!!!!

Originally posted by MikeNice81
However the adoptive parents refused to turn over the child. Despite a court order it took the father three years and several trips to the Ohio supreme court to get the order enforced.

That's one aspect of our Canadian system that is very good. You get the order, you attend within 48 hours with a cop in tow and that's that.

And if you take your child against a court order, you go to jail, no if ands or but. One of our Olympic medal winners in Montreal found that out the hard way when she took her daughter down to the states.

reply to post by Wildbob77


Tried that, her lawyer and judge said "inadmissible evidence".

Thank you.

reply to post by getreadyalready


Yes almost half of my son's unemployment goes towards child support.

My grand daughter is cared for, whenever we are allowed to see her, I ask her if she needs anything.....she usually says no, but I always slip her some money, clothes, food and vitamins anyway.

At Christmas, I buy her hundreds of dollars of winter stuff, Lands End Coat, knee socks, pjs, dresses, jeans, tops, sweaters, hoodies and shoes as well as toys and books.

She cannot help her father is unemployed and her mother is a jerk.

The main consideration though, is if my ex daughter in law had played her cards right, as I am a sucker for my grand daughter, she could have been receiving $1,500 every single month from me.

It was her choice, she would rather fight than learn to get along and remain on friendly terms for the sake of my grand daughter.

Some people are just mean.

As stated before, we have spent upwards of $15,000 on lawyers, one lawyer was Jeffrey Levin - Chicago who wrote "Father's Rights". We now have a lesser known & cheaper lawyer that has done more for us than Mr. Levine.

In Illinois, particularly in Kane County, the judge simply does not care.

My ex-daughter in law does not comply with the court rulings and they simply keep letting her get away with it.

In Kane County, Illinois, the judges are very prejudice against males.

I'm still angry about "mom" stomping on her cell phone we got her (by court order) so we could stay in communication with her.

When my son's lawyer told the judge about the phone, he shrugged.

fyi: My son has no criminal record, worked up until recently and has always been a interested and loving father. He had a very good role model. My husband has always been a excellent father.

Thank you though for your interest and help.

Originally posted by ripcontrol
reply to post by Lil Drummerboy

 

I cant give you enough stars good sir...

You did a good job... Just know the love for your child has nothing to do with if the child is biologically yours...

Have you considered suing the ex for the back child support you paid for a child that was not yours...

A friend of mine did it and won.... his was a case that sounds similar to yours

After 4 years of raising a kid that isn't yours the courts dismiss paternity as a legal issue. You are stuck even if you didn't know. What state was your friend in when he won the case?

I'm paying on my ex wifes 17 year old daughter that I raised until she was five. I found out she wasn't mine and was paying child support voluntarily (more than I was legally obligated to) when my ex went to the state wanting more.

She didn't get what she wanted but I am being legally required to support the child. When I was doing it because I wanted to take care of her I was happy to do it. Now. It burns me up on principle.

I'd still take care of her but I'd love to get legal redress. The settlement if i won would be enough to send her to any school she wanted.

reply to post by getreadyalready


You are right by bringing up the case of the Ohio man, I got a little off topic.

I'm glad things are that balanced where you live. Unfortunately for many men in many places the court is tilted. Cihild support gets augmented with orders to pay for all medical bills, or all school expenses, or other things. Then the woman can drag the man in to court any time he gets a raise or is late paying off a bill. Yet, when a woman breaks any court order it is shrugged off.

I agree that things shouldn't be the ay they are. Unfortunately bitterness and vindictiveness seem to be the rule of the day.

I pay Child support, and find the whole Child Support System retarded. let us not forget these people work for the government, so they are pretty much worthless. 2nd "Dead Beat Fathers" are kinda a myth, only around 10% of fathers don't pay child support. in fact child support waste thousands upon thousands, to get hundreds. The point is who cares, what the custodial parent do with the money... hopefully they are spending it on the kid, but If they are not, there is little you can do. It is not your problem, it is theirs. not that I don't get mad, because I give her all this money, and I still have to buy him shoe's and cloths...(which I don't mind) but after it is all said and done, she still views you a dirt bag... even though you do everything you are court ordered to do for your kid, and a ton more...

Great sci-fi writers have churned out novels and while entertaining we think, well that could never happen.............case in point, 1984 is here. Cameras on every street corner, townhouses spread out far and wide built right next to each other, no privacy, everyone watching everyone else. You even have the TV series, "Cops" and "Worlds Most Deadly Police Chases" film footage of police helicopter's chasing cars etc.

Most people, except the elite have no privacy, you can't even go out on your back deck and paint your toe nails without your neighbor knowing about it.

Well, read Scott Westerfeld's "Uglies"

What is happening, the division between man and woman, the dismantling of our strongest and most cherished unit, the single thing that makes us humans strong is purposely (I believe) being destroyed..........the family.

Yes, finally, even though we need each other for sex, the male and female are being separated out by pitting them against each other.

I believe this is a conspiracy................perpetrated by TPTB and furthered by those who run the well greased wheels for TPTB? its obvious the way our legal system, our schools, our military and our governments are being run.

In "The Uglies" (a novel I see coming very close to really happening) the children are separated from their parents at 12. They go to live in dorms like at school as "uglies" until they hit 16 when they get an operation to make them more within the normal limits of "beauty" (everyone gets to be pretty) to stop bickering, bullying and squash another differences.

However, the operation doesn't just turn them pretty.....................beauty comes at a price. I won't tell you what that price is but this novel is chilling.

The biggest conspiracy afoot is that our most sacred and cherished unit, the family is being destroyed from the inside out.

United we stand, divided we fall. I keep repeating this in many of my posts, not because I am becoming senile, everyone reading this needs to know that to truely win a war, to conquer your enemy you divide and conquer from the inside out. In a sense you plant a cancer within the center of your enemy and let it simply spread out.

War tactic, that's what divide and conquer is and it's the single most effective way of conquering a country or even a planet.

The next war tactic after you divide and conquer is to divert attention, or to keep your enemy "distracted". With us it's our corporate media owned news, ipods, cell phones, pcs, televisions, games, parties (read the Uglies), these are our "Prettie Party Towers" we are being imprisoned in without realizing it.

Usually I read political, current event books, conspiracy and philosophy books. I use to read tons of science fiction when I was young, but then stopped once I got into my 30's.

Until "The Uglies".

No, they won't make this into a movie; it tells too much of what is being done to us as a group.

With herd animals, let’s say cows, the cows, the females are smaller in size, sweet and docile, they can afford to be, they cluster around a bull who doesn't let anyone or anything near them. It is the bulls, because of the bulls sheer size, strength and aggressiveness that they will defend their cows. It is natures way.

With hunting tactics, if you really want to get the cows, you separate them from the bull, he is the protector, the big guns........pull out that bull, separate the bull from the cows and the cows are easy pickings.

I couldn't but help while reading, "The Uglies" and think, god that's what is starting to happen to our society right now. The family unit is being separated out by ? TPTB ?

Children no longer talk and interact with their parents; they are too busy with their ipods, texting, cell phones, xboxes and their own "culture". Old folks are put in old folks homes, kids just don't have any interaction with their parents anymore and now almost 50% don't have access to BOTH PARENTS.

Men and women are now divorcing at almost 50% rate. Just 50 years ago, divorce was very rare. I don't think it's people's fault, I think we are systematically being divided to make it easier to conquer us.

I read a lot, and one of my favorite books is Sun Tzu's "Art of War"..............Divide to conquer and we as a species are being divided. Men from women, children from parents. It's happening right under our noses.

Corporations now are making "work" so hard, so stressful that once you get home, having a drink and watching the telly (which I think is also sending out digital signals to our brain subconsciously) is about all the average middle age person does.

Where I worked at, I was an oddity, I have been married going on 37 years. Most women (I don't know about the men, there weren't that many in my area) were not married. Some were divorced and many approaching their thirties weren't even married, they lived alone or with a girlfriend.

Kids are left to fend for themselves, daycare stops at around 10-12. They are plugged in and tuned out to what is going on with themselves and their family. So our children are developing their own culture, and being readied for accepting the New World Order.

I couldn't again help read this book and think, god, a lot of this separation of the family has already taken place.

It's so subtle, people aren't even seeing it.

To really conquer a whole planet, you can't just rush in with tanks and guns and huge tripods. That tactic wouldn't work with humanity, we would, once like in War of the Worlds, unit and fight together. So the conquering has to be done subtlety, quietly and thoroughly.

In it's first stages, It's done by pitting everyone against each other.

When I worked in an office for a fortune 500 company, I watched how management "managed". You can have just a few manage (herd) the many. How? They got everyone to watch and snitch on everyone else. Go into your office this morning and look at how the cubes are placed, there is no privacy, in almost all offices and most public places now, everything is arranged so that no one can ever be alone we are all being watched or under "surveillance". And no I don't believe it's all for homeland security or simply just by coincidence, there's a purpose to it all, yes even how the cubes in an office are arranged. I've watched people with just a little power, big fish in little ponds and nothing is left to chance, everything is calculated and thought out, everything.

In the office I worked at, you couldn't even make a phone call - cells wouldn't work, if you were not in a public area where you could be heard. You would have to go outside.

I don't think I'm being paranoid, I think, like Scott Westerfeld, I'm seeing an emerging pattern here.

Humanity is being pitted against each other like we have always been, except this time and right now, it's the family unit that is under attack.

Think about it, destroy the family unit and you destroy humankinds strongest defense.

Divide and conquer.

Beings this is a conspiracy site, I thought I would just throw this thought out. Forewarned is forearmed.

Again, I don't normally read science fiction anymore, but I bought "The Uglies" for my granddaughter and before I give her any book, I always read through it............this guy has got "their" number.

Yes, it's science fiction/fantasy for now but so were Jules Vern and Orwell.

We are being pitted against each other to make us easier to control..............the question is by whom?

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