You wanna experience life and death at the same time? You gotta come over here to the West Side O' Chi Town Brah, and join with these maniacs that
smoke the mintleaf. That's everybody's fave herb soaked in embalming fluid.
In all seriousness - I think one big issue with you is that you are smart and imaginative. Life never really lives up to the hype, does it? And where
others can ignore the grey - you see black that cannot be ignored. On top of which they seem to get great joy out of crappy boring things. Erg.
You think too much.
I'll bet you 900 Million $ you've heard that one before.
Ah, but intelligence and imagination are sometimes blessings and sometimes curses. The simplest answer is that we must take control of our own minds
and direct them towards things that interest us in a positive way.
The world is run by and for the stupid.
To them a crappy fast food sandwich is a thing of awesome beauty - to the thinking person its badly chemically flavored dead animal flesh.
Don't believe ANY hype! Either positive or negative! Things are hyped up in the media to get them through the thick simplistic skulls of the masses
who operate off base emotions. They don't call 'em Sheep for nothing.
As a Thinking Person - don't YOU believe the hype nor extrapolate it in your superior imagination.
DIRECT this wonderful energy to things that will benefit YOU!
Turn OFF the TV!
Limit net usage and take it all with a grain of salt.
I am like you.
I can see what a big issue for you is: You are a smart, thinking, imaginative, feeling, person, in a world full of morons.
This is a big chunk of your 'depression' I'm guessing.
You must begin to realign your mind. Take CHARGE of it man! YOU are in control! Learn new ways of thinking!
Not to "conform" mind you, in fact the opposite - you must shut the BS out and find your own way and focus all your energy on that.
I tell myself:
And I have too - I've had a hard life, bad childhood, health issues, illness, waking up to the fact that the world is run by morons, nothing is what
its cracked up to be.....
I know man, believe me.
I keep going though.
Threw myself into mentally challenging work and hobbies, stopped believing hype, stopped caring so much what others thought of me or if I "fit in".
I don't "fit in" - I'm a werido
I embraced it and went with it.
Have had some interesting
experiences for sure. And I have been successful - by my own measure - AFTER going through very bad times too.
Hey. I'm weird. I've accepted it. What others tell me I *should* do - yeah I know enough to see that THAT won't make me happy.
Thich - you just redirect
your energy! Don't leave! Don't let THEM win!!!
Everyone here likes you - it's a start.
Look at my Wolverine in my avi. I chose this guy as I absolutely LOVE Wolverines! They are the fiercest
creature of the woods. The GODS of the
forest! They NEVER back down and can take down animals many times their size such as Moose. They are GODS! Go read about them. BE LIKE the Wolverine!
Mystical and Fierce GOD! A creature that DOES live up to its hype!
Be like the Wolverine. NEVER surrender!!! Don't let "them" win! And the Wolverine always WINS! Even in the worst of circumstance against huge
predators - the Wolverine always
wins because it is fierce and tough and never backs down!
And if worse ever does come to worse - you jump on the plane and go to Chi. You tell the cabbie to drop you somewhere in Berwyn.......
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!! And then it'll be all over but the shoutin'
You gotta laugh at times too, laugh in the face of all the crap.
I wish you PEACE man! I really do.