Brandon loved her, that was certain, but this Facebook thing since the kid came was getting out of hand. First, she claimed she made the page so her mom and step dad in Arkansas could watch her belly grow.

At first, she only added relatives, and then she pouted until he made a page. He had one friend, her. Before he knew it, her friend list had grown to over 500, many of them complete strangers who "liked" her belly pics. Brandon asked her who these people were, and she scoffed.

"Well, Kelso Nine Guns I met on a metal lover's fan page, and Shirley Hoover, well I added her because I loved her statement on the msnbc page about taxes, so right on." Right on indeed she went along using Facebook, often times communicating vital information on his wall, which since he never checked his Facebook he never saw.

So thus was instigated the mandatory download of the Facebook app, on his phone, because Lord Forbid he miss her messages. She often sent them from the other room, where he could hear her fingers flying across the keyboard.

His coworkers snickered at him, because his phone buzzed four or five times a shift, all wall updates for him to read from her. Now that the baby had been born, she insisted that his profile picture be of little Damien, often of them dressed alike doing something like standing in front of the oak in the back yard, smiling at Mommy taking ten thousand pictures that uploaded directly to her Facebook page with a Photopail app.

The latest status update was pushing it. He really loved the new pots and pans his mom had gotten them as an "early xmas" present, too, but it was not even October, they were NOT an early xmas present, they were important because he was barely paying the rent and light bill, not to mention the baby stuff and what have you, so really it had been charity and while not a BIG deal, he felt a flash of anger, at her, when he had read that update. A man had Pride, and this woman was slowly stripping his away!!

"Thank you SO MUCH second momma and poppa, for the early Xmas gift, a brand new set of Revere ware pots and pans, and a brand new set of knives, Brandon needed those so badly for his Chef job!"

Damnit, no he did NOT!! His employer provided better knives than his mom had bought, hell his mom hated cooking and would not know a sharp knife if it sliced her plumb in half. And he was barely accepted as a line cook here at his new job, the title of Chef had to be earned. In fact, the more he thought of that latest status update the more he simmered like the boullion he was preparing.

"Hey, go gently dude, its boulllion not pizza dough. Why dont you get home to that wife and baby, we're slow tonight, and enjoy that new stuff your parents got ya."

"What?" Brandon growled, glaring at his Chef. Surprised at the mild mannered young man's uncharacteristic response, Chef took a step back and pointed to the door.

"Two days, paid time off. See you next week, get out of my kitchen, chump."

The Chef was still shaking his head a moment later when he heard Brandon peel out of the parking lot and away in the night. Sous Chef wandered over, and asked what was up.

Neither knew, nor did either of them doubt she would soon be updating them on the situation, from her rainbow universe of Facebook.
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"But Brandon, baby, I didnt mean to embarass you! Let me erase it then, I am sorry."

"They all already read it and laughed at me, dont you understand that? It cannot be erased that I Brandon Gibbons, cannot provide for my wife and child! Do you enjoy cutting me off at the knees for the world to see??" He snarled at her.

She quickly opened her laptop but it enraged him, and he slammed it shut, shoving her away and onto the floor.

He jumped atop of her, pinning her down, and began to tell her, exactly how he felt.

"Now the whole world knows I am a failure, you bitch, it is September, CHARITY is given in September NOT Xmas presents!! How many of these "friends" would you recognize on the street, yet they have all liked your naked belly full of our child! They like to see new pictures of our baby online, thousands of pictures you share with strangers!! You would rather message me on Facebook than speak to me FACE....TO......FACE.....IN.....OUR......OWN.....HOME......." Suddenly, his rage spent, he sighed, and sank and shriveled.

Slowly he released his fingers from the grip they had maintained about her neck, and in true horror, he realized, he had just killed his wife.

From the other room, the baby was crying, so Brandon stood, brushed himself off, and went to comfort his child.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Chef chuckled, holding out his phone for Sous Chef to see the newest update from Brandon's wife. It was almost closing time, Brandon had been home less than four hours, and now this. Chef felt once again validated in his wise judgement.

"See, Sous Chef? I knew all that kid needed was a little time off to get his house in order. Look what she has to say!"

Sous chef read the status update, and they both laughed as they headed out for the night.

"Hey yall, I think I need to take a little break from this Facebook thing for a while, and spend some quality time with the wonderful family God blessed me with. Bye!"

Just had to write this this morning, inspiration hit, and I wrote. Just a little nugget of horror for Halloween.

That was a fun little read! Bet the odds of it actually happening might be pretty good too sadly.I know how it feels to get a thought in your head and want to get it written out... good job

Loved it!

Thanks for the enjoyable read!

Thanks, yall for reading it and enjoying it. It was fun to write.

Great story. I really enjoyed reading it.

That was entertaining. Very well writtren. :-) I was actually expecting at the end that this was true and it actually happened.

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Posted Via ATS Mobile: m.abovetopsecret.com

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Thank you shawny and minihaha! I appreciate you reading my story. This one was inspired by a post I read on someone's wall, and it got me thinking, what if....?

I enjoyed reading this. It could almost be viewed as a black comedy in a sense.

Originally posted by setsukijonin
I enjoyed reading this. It could almost be viewed as a black comedy in a sense.

Thank you for readin my story! Yes, a black comedy would describe it fairly well, wouldn't it?