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Originally posted by Roufas
Sex is indeed part of marriage.
Of course I am against any kind of "rape", but seriously, if you do not want to have sex with your husband, and want to keep denying him, just divorce him already, because there is obviously something wrong in that relationship (whoever fault it is).
Then be a happy single person.
Originally posted by Americanist
U.K. cleric: Rape is impossible within marriage
www.msnbc.msn.com
(visit the link for the full news article)
LONDON — A leading Muslim cleric has sparked controversy in Britain by claiming that it is impossible for men to rape their wives.
Sheikh Maulana Abu Sayeed, who is president of the Islamic Sharia Council, told a website that "sex is part of marriage" and suggested that husbands who commit such acts should not be prosecuted.
source
Marital Rape: New Research and Directions by Raquel Kennedy Bergen With contributions from Elizabeth Barnhill (February 2006). In Brief: Approximately 10-14% of married women are raped by their husbands in the United States. Approximately one third of women report having “unwanted sex” with their partner. Historically, most rape statutes read that rape was forced sexual intercourse with a woman not your wife, thus granting husbands a license to rape. On July 5, 1993, marital rape became a crime in all 50 states, under at least one section of the sexual offense codes. In 20 states, the District of Columbia, and on federal lands there are no exemptions from rape prosecution granted to husbands. However, in 30 states, there are still some exemptions given to husbands from rape prosecution. In most of these 30 states, a husband is exempt when he does not have to use force because his wife is most vulnerable (e.g., she is mentally or physically impaired, unconscious, asleep, etc.) and is unable to consent. Women who are raped by their husbands are likely to be raped many times—often 20 or more times. They experience not only vaginal rape, but also oral and anal rape. Researchers generally categorize marital rape into three types; force-only rape, battering rape and sadistic. Women are at particularly high risk for being raped by their partners under the following circumstances:
* Women married to domineering men who view them as “property”
* Women who are in physically violent relationships
* Women who are pregnant
* Women who are ill or recovering from surgery
* Women who are separated or divorced
It is a myth that marital rape is less serious than other forms of sexual violence. There are many physical and emotional consequences that may accompany marital rape:
* Physical effects include injuries to the vaginal and anal areas, lacerations, soreness, bruising, torn muscles, fatigue, and vomiting.
* Women who are battered and raped frequently suffer from broken bones, black eyes, bloody noses and knife wounds.
* Gynecological effects include vaginal stretching, pelvic inflammation, unwanted pregnancies, miscarriages, stillbirths, bladder infections, sexually transmitted diseases, HIV, and infertility.
* Short-term psychological effects include PTSD, anxiety, shock, intense fear, depression and suicidal ideation.
* Long-term psychological effects include disordered sleeping, disordered eating, depression, intimacy problems, negative self-images, and sexual dysfunction.
Research indicates a need for those who come into contact with marital rape survivors-- police officers, health care providers, religious leaders, advocates and counselors--to comprehensively address this problem and provide resources, information and support. Those who work in batterers’ intervention programs should also work to eliminate marital rape and to comprehensively address sexual violence.
Originally posted by Korg Trinity
Originally posted by Roufas
Sex is indeed part of marriage.
Of course I am against any kind of "rape", but seriously, if you do not want to have sex with your husband, and want to keep denying him, just divorce him already, because there is obviously something wrong in that relationship (whoever fault it is).
Then be a happy single person.
Hmmmm I have to disagree quite strongly here. I'm a 36 year old English man and I feel the need to fill you in on a few things.
There are many reasons why a female can have reduced desire to engage in sexual activity. I myself have had to endure periods of time when my partner has had reduced libido.
But if you love the person you are with then working through the problem with honest conversation and if needed therapy can help.
Marriage does not give either the man or the woman the god given right to have sex with their partner on demand, unless both parties involved consent. A women’s sexual desire is not like a tap that you can turn on or off whenever you feel like it.
Women need emotionally coaxing into the feeling of wanting it, The physical stuff follows that.
If your attitude is that your wife should give it to you on demand, you are indeed likely to head for divorce. And you will end up a lonely single while she finds someone whom can appreciate her for whom she is and not purely for sex.
Korg.edit on 14-10-2010 by Korg Trinity because: Spelling
Originally posted by getreadyalready
reply to post by Americanist
Mine may not be a popular opinion on this thread, but I agree with the cleric about 85%!
If women expect monogamy, then men should be able to expect willingness to have sex. With my ex-wife we often had arguments about sex.
[Snip]
In my current marriage this is better understood and often discussed. My wife always has the opportunity to say no, but she does so with the understanding that if I am adament about the sex, then I am going to get some at home or elsewhere. [Snip]
Luckily my new wife understands my sex drive
To some men, she might seem like the perfect woman: She's a willowy 5 feet 7 and 120 pounds. She'll chat with you endlessly about your interests. And she'll have sex whenever you please -- as long as her battery doesn't run out.
Meet Roxxxy, who may be the world's most sophisticated talking female sex robot. For $7,000, she's all yours
Originally posted by Roufas
I fail to see where you disagree with me? You actually agree there is a "problem" in the relationship when there is no sex.
Originally posted by jexmo
reply to post by Korg Trinity
That’s just shallow. Love doesn't require sex. Elderly couples don't have sex and they still love each other. You never heard of wanking?! I think it all depends on the type of person you are. I'd sacrifice sex for certainty that my partner would stay with me happily forever, but thats just the type of person I am.
The biggest cause of loss of libido in women these days is pressure and being too tired. Since the demands on women have increased to encompass bread winning as well as child nurturing.