Why do I keep dreaming of him? What do these dreams mean?

Let's call this person T. In really life we used to hang out everyday but then the friendship turned sour because he would just come to my house all the time and he would just be on the computer. We would never go outside and hangout anymore. On Halloween day, we decided to hangout, with my cousin. We walked three cities from my house (including picking up my cousin). On the way home, they wanted to stop at the store to get some stuff to drink. I told them, I will wait across the street because I'm too tired, they said ok but we aren't buying you anything then. I said ok. So anyway, I waited and I never saw them. It's dark, I'm by myself and it's Halloween night, which means gangsters are shooting and robbing people. How could they just leave me like this!? I called up my father and he picked me up. Later when I went on the internet they both (cousin and T) starting sending me mean messages. Then T had the nerve to say that he was hungry and I should bring him food, when he lives at least 15 blocks away! He wanted me to go outside in the dark again! Later he said his mom is going to buy him food anyway so whatever! Then I told him that he should stay away from my cousin because he betrays everyone but he didn't listen. He claims that he was going to make things calm and peaceful again. He would say let's hang out after school. Then he would talk to me for like 10 minutes and say he was in a rush to go somewhere.

I'm just telling you this so that you can compare real life with the dreams. I used to love him and I think he knew I was gay but I'm not sure. I don't even think about him now and we don't see each other at all so it's weird that I still dream about it.

Here's one from a while ago:

I had a dream that there were many different people sitting on benches. Someone said something hateful to the gays and then the straight and gays just sat together in defense. I snuck up to a table with these girls and they said "Yay gay people are sitting with us". I didn't really want to sit there I was striving for another place although I did not know where I was trying to sneak to or why. We were all at a park anyway...

I went to some table and one of my old classmates appeared playing some game with some people. There was T. I haven't seen him in so long I didn't know what to say. He came up to me and set next to me. He was playing on his phone looking for something and told me that he needed to tell me something. I think there were naked pictures of himself but I'm not sure. He told my old classmate and the others to go away for a second and they went to the other table. T didn't seem as gangster as he used to be. He matured a bit. He told me that he missed me and that he was wanted to be my boyfriend or whatever I want to call it (I'm guessing he said this because he don't know what it's like to be gay or not used to it). I was so happy and shocked; I said "yes". Our arms and feet locked together liike in a beautiful romance movie. He said "um... if we stay like this they're going to know" (Not that he cared but he knew I was in the closet. So we unlocked and stared into each other's eyes. Everyone at the other table didn't know what was going on. After that I woke up.


Here's the one I had recently:

I had company over at my house and suddenly after not seeing T for a long time. T showed up. T was just relaxing in my room while I was in the living room with my friend. We talked about My Chemical Romance, which she loves and a lot of other trivial stuff. Later she left (mom picked her up), and I went to my room where T was at. He was with his brother (which happened in real life too). I apologized saying that I wasn't trying to ignore him but my friend really needed me. He told me it was OK. He said he knew I was busy taking care of the party stuff. Then I said I'll be right back and his brother started flirting with my sister. Then T invited me to drive around with him and his brother (alone). I said OK. They said they were going to a bowling ally (which turned out to be some sort of gym for playing soccer). Little did I know, he called up everyone from the party so that they can play with us. It was my mom, sister, cousins, old friends, everyone. The night ended up OK. I did wanted to ask him why he wanted to hang out with my after all this time but never got the chance to.

Disclaimer: I don't interpret other people's dreams, but some dream motifs and characters are dreamt by many, many people, and I sometimes recognize those motifs and characters. I can tell you what several of the people who have dreamt dreams like yours have thought about their dreams, but only you can decide whether that has anything to do with your personal dream.

Definitely, the "inappropriate couple" dream is widespread. I can't think that being gay would make any difference. It is the contrast between the intimacy of the bond and the unlikelihood of the partner that drives the motif.

Sometimes I am bold, or foolish, enough to speculate about why a particular person might dream about this kind of relatioship of just that person at just this time. But I don't have a clue in your case (maybe not in the other cases, either).

There are some candidate explanations, though. I really don't know whether any of them apply to you, but just for discussion:

A lot of realistic dreams are simply compensatory. The personal unconscious "leans against the wind" of conscious choices. The very fact that you don't much like this fellow in real life is reason enough to think about the opposite. Sort of like the old gag "Don't think about apples."

At least for some people, I think, the motif is more subtly compensatory. The conscious decision may have been made for excellent cause, but made despite the person having other qualities which are attractive. It's sort of like what a lot of people go through when they resolve to clean out the attic or the basement. They find something that they haven't used in years, and yet "it's too good to throw out."

There also may be deeper reasons. There must have been something about the person that explains how you ever became whatever friends you did become. Maybe that's still there. Perhaps sorting out what that was will help you in future relationships. Maybe, but not necessarily, it might be useful in salvaging what can be salvaged from this one, too.

Finally, please remember that dreams are figurative, and that hyperbole and exaggeration are popular figures of speech. To express the prosaic idea "perhaps you have thrown out the baby with the bath water," the poetic source of dreams might choose vivid and startling imagery, not in the hopes of being taken literally, but of being taken seriously.

Well dreamt.