Well done, my friend,
You are right,
if there is even one single thing wrong with one of us,
there is something wrong with all of us.
I daily go through the same feelings, thoughts, and emotions you describe.
There really is nothing wrong with 'you'.
But there is something wrong with us.
Many things wrong.
Even if an individual embraces nothing but positivity and goodness, and practices only benevolence,
That individual is still a part of the problem.
Because, as you know, we are all One.
I feel that there is nothing wrong with any of us,
But there definitely is something wrong with all of us.
(i know, doesnt make much sense, but in my head it does). lol
If one wire in a computer is out of place , or connected to the wrong thing,
It will effect the computer as a whole, not just the one little thing that that the out of place wire is meant for.
We lack harmony.
because we lack understanding.
and even if only one lacks understanding, that means we all lack it.
Be thankful, my friend...
that your are capable of having these thoughts.
The masses do not even think about this kind of thing.
They really would go 'crazy' if they were forced to contemplate these things.
and many do.
Be glad that you are able to contemplate these things and still "function".
I sometimes momentarily forget this myself...
But we have to remember, that everything is exactly as it should be at this moment.
and everything will be as it should be, when it is supposed to be.
no matter how messed up things seem, and no matter how much we fail to understand the "whys, and hows"..
The Universe does know what it is doing, and we have to trust that.
The only thing we can really do, is try to understand, and try to bring whatever understandings we do have,
to others who lack that understanding.
I feel like i had a whole lot more to write, but am currently blanking out, so my apologies if my words seem silly, or 'lacking'. lol
You are in the right 'place' bro, and doing exactly the right 'thing'.
Thanks for being you.