Wow. What a powerful testimony. I can now see where you are coming from (on another thread). Thanks for sharing that OP.
There is a story for me to tell as well. This is not being told to push what I believe on anyone, but I have to tell all of it because it’s all
relative to where I am at today.
Three years ago my own life was literally turned completely upside down. I know that God was in it, and prior to that time I was 'double minded' (I
know that you know what that means). It was then that I realized what the 'machine' really was, and how I was contributing to it and following it,
I too had a brush with the law, and I must say it was very humiliating for me, especially when hearing the verdict "guilty" after jury trial, and
watching those that worked for the court (the ones that read the verdict and type the paperwork, a couple feet away from the judge) laugh at me while
doing so. The judge threw the book at me, and today I am still required to pay large sums of $$$ to the system, as part of my sentencing, along with a
long term probation, and 52 weeks of classes that I must pay for, and a no negative contact order for my husband. We are going through bankruptcy now,
and I must rely on God completely, as my husband and I are 'self-employed' and our $$$ situation has changed drastically as well..
You will probably laugh at me, and I don't blame you, but I went through life thinking that the USA was one nation under the same God. I've heard
churches endorse candidates for election, usually republican, because they were 'christians' and 'moral'. (don't laugh yet, it gets worse)
I remember reading a post on MSN forums about Bush and the weapons of mass destruction, and how it was unfounded. I read the response of several
others which all conveyed the same message. At this point, I still had one foot in the world, and only belief in God (no more relationship), as a
result, so anything that anyone said in the name of God, to me, was all the same, no discernment on my part.
After reading that post, I decided to respond, also. I went through the whole ‘blackout bomb’ scenario and how Bush was doing what was best for
this country, and why can’t anyone understand that, etc. (now you can laugh, but it gets worse yet)
On one side I was involved again in the ‘church’ doing what I thought was my duty as a Christian. My husband and I taught JR. High Youth group on
Wed. evenings, attended on Sundays, and attended another study group on Saturdays. I had a desire to know God again, but most of it was steeped in
‘religious knowledge’, not relationship. (and I knew better)
On the other side my husband and I got along well (after 10 years) though we had court issues concerning his previous marriage and child custody
issues that brought us back & forth through the courts every few months for the entire 10 years. (11 years for him at that point). Other than that, he
and I didn’t have any real problems between our selves.
He and I made several home investments. We turned all the properties except for 2, one home as a rental and one home that we live in. We were planning
our future on our own (aside from God, didn’t need his help on that) because we were still drinking the Kool-Aid at that time, thinking we live in
the land of opportunity and we need to make the most of that opportunity.
Everything seemed to be going just fine in our lives. Many large sums of money passed through our fingers, and went out just as quickly. It appeared
that everything we touched turned to gold. Even our business accountant would shake his head and say things like ‘I don’t know how you guys do it.
This shouldn’t work like this.’
Boy, we thought we were blessed. We thought that our future retirement was going to be perfect and nothing could bring us down. Let me tell you, when
it comes down, it comes down HARD. But this didn’t happen right away. –I must add that I have been on my own since I was 16, and have worked very
hard, usually 2 full time jobs at a time, until I was able to become self employed. A lot of blood, sweat and tears went into it.
One day, I was sitting at my computer, after praying for wisdom all week. I was bored and had some time on my hands. I usually only used the computer
for games, youth teaching material, or E-bay sales because I had an E-bay store. I was looking up some materials online for the youth group on E-bay
when I ran across a dvd on the ‘Bohemian Grove’. I had no idea what a ‘Bohemian Grove’ was, but by the description it looked like someone was
trying to convey something important.
I decided to run a search on it, which brought me to a youtube video. I can’t even express to you the shock that went through my system, like
someone had clunked me on the head with a sledgehammer. Grief and mourning went through my heart for weeks afterward. It was like everything I had
believed in (worldly) suddenly died. There is no other way to describe it. I started thinking back to things I was taught in school, presidential
endorsements that were made in churches, the whole ‘One nation Under God’ thing and every other conceivable notion that our nation were ‘the
Then, I started thinking back to all the inconsistent things that were done by Bush and all the other presidents before him, who claimed they were men
of ‘faith’. I can’t tell you how this ‘killed me’ inside. What were these ‘men of faith’ doing in a grove praying to molech?
I spent an entire year researching everything else that never added up. The deeper you research, the deeper that rabbit hole gets. I spent a year on
information overload, I could recite what I was learning in my sleep, because I had spent so many hours researching, researching, and researching.
Well, the more you know, the more you want others to know. This didn’t pan out very well for me. My husband thought I was crazy and didn’t want to
hear about it. My family back east thought I was off my rocker and didn’t want to hear about it. The people at church didn’t want to hear about
it, and thought I had ‘lost it’. Nobody wanted to know anything.
In the meantime the rest of my life turned upside down. The economy turned, and with our backs up against the wall, we had to rent out our rental home
to some folks we would have never considered before. The $$$ stopped coming in, and we were out of options. We lost money in the stock market,
actually all of it, as I was doing my own trading. We were in hock up to our eyeballs. My husband’s daughter, who lived with us full time, had
turned 15 and was acting out, which was ripping up the relationship (I thought we had) between my husband and I.
My husbands brother had lost everything in NJ (his own doing), moved to CA (where we live) and kept making secretive phone calls to our 15 year old,
telling her things like “don’t talk to your step mother about anything, go to your dad. She’s not your parent.” (The 15 year old and I had a
very good relationship until that upheaval began. We could talk about anything) The brother in law began making phone calls to my husband giving him
court advice, and really pushing divorce advice, behind my back. His motive was to move into our home, where he could manipulate his younger brother
(my husband), and have my husband support him, where all his other woman left off in NJ. This whole thing came to light in marriage counseling when my
husband finally put 2+2 together. I had no idea all this was going on. All I knew was that my life was coming apart at the seams and I couldn’t do
anything about it. I felt like I was swatting at flies in the dark, with a blindfold on, just out of control.
Other things happened. I was forced to put down my favorite pet, which grieved me. My mother came out for a 6 week visit and stirred the pot between
all of us (a side to her I didn’t even knew existed) especially between me and my husband. She went back home and gossiped to all our family about
my ‘family life’ out here, which was unusually not the norm, and how my husband and I have no relationship whatsoever.
We have been in civil court with my husbands ex for years. They still haven’t worked out the financial details, even today. Well, her day in court
came first (by our own acceptance) for a purposed amount of $$$. This was not a judgment against us, this was just a purposed amount until my
husband’s day in court, which probably supercedes that amount. His ex took this info and somehow went to child services with it, and they came after
him, without any judgment documentation. So, while all the other things I mentioned were going on, child services took away my husbands drivers
license, and sent threats through the mail about jail time. They also put a lean on our rental property. Meanwhile the creditors had a field day with
us, and took $3000 out of one of my accounts for a credit card, which resulted in our rental property payment bouncing, and because the amount they
took superceded the amount in the account from other misc. payments, the bank came after me for money to settle that matter, which I did not have.
By this point everything in me was shaken. I am barely even skimming the surface of all the happenings of that period of time. It got to the point
that family (out here) thought I was going to commit suicide, because I was planning to go to a hotel for a week to clear my head. Suicide was the
last thing on my mind, but again family began involving themselves in our lives, and not by invitation. Also my husband and I had our attorney draw up
divorce paperwork, during all this.
The final straw was this; On Dec. 4 2008, the 15 year old got mad at me, and completely disrespected me. This was going on all along during this time,
but on that day, that was the mother of all disrespect (which I won’t get into). As a result she moved in with her mother that day. Her mother sent
police to my house that night, trying to say I hit her daughter, which I didn’t (this woman hates me more than hate itself, especially since her
daughter and I have a relationship that they do not have, not to mention she hates my husband even more so, therefore their divorce). The police came
into our home, rolled their eyes, and said the only reason they came out is because they have to follow up on complaints. Then they left.
Well, this incident happened 2 weeks before my husband’s day in civil court on custody and financial issues. Not only were we having major marital
issues, but, because the daughter moved in with her mother, he despised me even more. It got very ugly. There was nothing I could say or do. He
despised me so badly that the horrible things he said to me before the incident, pailed in comparison to some of the things he did afterward. My own
spirit was broken deeply enough before all this came about.
His day in court came and went. He was looking like the bad guy now, so he and his attorney pushed things out yet another 2 months. A week before that
date came (daughter still living with mom, who has poisoned her with hatred toward us since the beginning, which resulted in the courts putting her
under our guardianship to begin with because it was so blatant) my husband and I had it out. In the heat of the moment (details left out) I smashed a
clock over his head, something I would have never done in a million years. I don’t break anything in anger let alone hurt someone else in the past,
but this particular evening was ‘the final straw’.
In anger my husband decided to one-up me, and called 911. I left the house, parked somewhere, and cried for hours. When I returned home, the police
had already been there and left. I talked with my husband for about 15 minutes, then he went to bed, and I went to sleep on the couch. At 5am an
officer was at my door. Long story short we talked on the porch. In the back of my mind I was thinking court, so I steered clear of anything that
might incriminate my husband, not realizing I was being recorded the whole time and not knowing what my husband had told him hours before.
He cuffed me and drove me to jail. The officer even made comments to me that my husband was upset that he was taking me to jail (which mysteriously
disappeared from the tapes). He read me my rights after we got to jail (which mysteriously shows up in the middle of the tapes). I was shacked a few
days later and sent to a detention center.
I have never been in trouble in my life. I’ve never even had a speeding ticket in my whole life. The things that they did in detention (ie. To get
my DNA, etc) was humiliating and just broke me to the core of my being. Then, in my pajamas (that’s how I was taken to begin with) they sent me out
of there in the middle of the night a week later, and told me to get off the property in 10 minutes or I would be ‘processed in’ all over again.
This was in an industrial area late at night, and the closest gas station was two miles away. I had nothing on me, no money, no phone, nothing, and
wearing only pajamas which looks suspicious enough.
The trial was worse, of course much of that due to the OJ trial. I watched between the Judge and the state prosecutor (fellow craft) allowing evidence
that didn’t even pertain to the night in question. My representative (a woman) gave it her all, and nothing she used was even considered. They
bypassed my right to a speedy trial in order to wait for the cop to come back from his wife’s pregnancy leave, so they could use him against me as
the witness, who wasn’t even there, who patted me on the shoulder when he left the courtroom that day, and whispered ‘good luck’ (I think he
meant it in a good way, he even wavered on some of the conversation he and I had in the car on the way to the station).
The prosecutor, after winning the case told my attorney (in front of me) “It’s too bad. She seems like such a nice girl” (then he laughed and
held the door open for me). The whole experience was belittling and humiliating. I felt like the woman with the scarlet letter, having to stand up in
front of the jury members while they introduced me each time as the criminal defendant.
I am not the same person I was before all this happened. I can honestly say everything inside of me to the core of who I am was torn to shreds from
the onset of things mentioned earlier to the final part I just wrote about. I always thought that I was the one that beat myself up the hardest, but
even this proved me wrong.
Since then, everything (other than some obvious effects) has gone back to normal, like it never happened. My husband was told by child services that
they had no idea how that flimsy paperwork got through, and withdrew everything. His daughter moved back in with us a year ago, apologizing to me for
all the wrongs she committed against me behind my back, and in tears. My mother has since begun to see that the ‘world’ is not what she thought it
was either and wishes that my siblings would open their eyes to what is going on. My husband treats me more lovingly than he ever did before all this
upheaval began and for the first time our marriage really is solid. My family out here seems to have ‘forgotten’ more than they remember about
anything going on in my life. All the things that really matter are back in place. I know that it was a spiritual shaking that went on in my life;
there is no doubt, as there was even more happening than what I listed here. I felt like I was watching a whirlwind spiraling around me, and all I
could do was watch it. Take every bad experience that can happen in a lifetime and toss it into 18 months, and that is what it was like.
I know that we are in a corrupt system. There is nothing I can physically do to secure my own future within it. Money is not important to me anymore,
and I could really care less about anything material. The most important thing to me is the ‘God’ I serve. And though the people I am surrounded
with are important to me also, that could all change at a moments notice too. I look back at everything that spiraled out of control during a period
of 2 years, and I can’t look at the world the same way either. I now understand the full meaning of ‘we are in this world, but we are not of this
world’. There is nothing alluring enough in this world for me to ever care about what it has to offer me. I am now enjoying the security that comes
from a relationship with God, and have no fear about what ‘the future holds’ whether it be fulfilled prophecy, or a strategic power play by the
I realize that problems come our way in everyone’s life, which is normal, but I don’t see them as mountains anymore either. My stress is gone, my
anger is gone, any vanity is gone, and so is my own personal will. It is not about me anymore, that part is dead and buried. It is about life and what
will I do in it? What will really matter and what won’t? Even if TPTB were not breaking the dollar (which I believe they are) and everything
appeared to cycle around again, I have no desire whatsoever to drink the world's Kool-Aid ever again, no matter what form it comes in.