Blood is holy... not anymore!

I have always said that 'blood' comes before everyone else. My family has been holy to me my entire life and I never let someone come between that, not even my husband. Many times I've put my life on hold to fix someone elses problems and I never complained about that (my husband did, but he doesn't get to have a say in things when it involves my 'holy' family!)
If they needed money, I gave them money. I let them buy gas on my companies' credit card because they can't afford it. I bought them a washing machine because they didn't have the money. I invited them into my house for over a month when they didn't have the means to heat the house in winter. I bought them food, lend them my car (always to get it back with an empty gas tank) picked up their kids from school, drove to a nightstore to get them cigarets when they didn't have transportation, jumped to go fix their computer or Internet connection, drove them to the unions office several times, even get them a job! etc etc etc... I can write pages with all the things they have asked me and all the things I have done for them in the last years. Not to mention all them times I did noting but 'being there' for them all. I can't count the hours I spend on the phone with them when they needed to vent, saying it will be ok, helping them to fix the problem or fix it for them.
The reason I did those things is because, well... it's family and I love them all and family has to stick together. Like I said, my husband complained from time to time, but then I would say to him “they would do the same for us!”

On the other side, I have never asked one of them for something. I like to fix my own problems and I don't like to bother other people when I don't have to. So far I never had to.

But the last weeks I've been having a rough time and I had to ask them for a few small favors. Things like: 'can you go feed the dog one time because I can't make it in time', or 'can you go pick up my kid from school and drop her off at home (that only takes 10 min).
The thing is, every time I ask them something they come up with an excuse and they say 'no'.

Yesterday I spend the whole day in the ER, turned out I have kidney stones. At this moment I'm on medication and I'm having terrible pain. My husband is at work and I need someone to pick up my kid at the bus stop. I called everyone, they all said no. One stupid excuse after another. Even my mother said no because she had plans for today (she's visiting grandma). Is it so much to ask? Can't she take a 5 min detour for this once? Well I guess not.
So, proud as I am, I'll be taking my bike in two hours, bite through the pain and pick up my kid myself.

I'm shocked, how can they be like that? I cried earlier, they make me feel like I don't mean anything to them, except for when they need something.
I have friends who live 3 hours away from me, but I'm sure that if I call them they would jump in their car right now and drive this way!

Blood is holy? Not anymore.... I'm done with them all!
I'm done with putting my life on hold for them and I'm done with fixing their problems!
It's not like I really needed them today, like I said, I can bite through the pain and do things myself (just like I've always done), but I figured that for this once they would at least understand the situation and help me out here. They do understand, they aren't stupid... and they certainly aren't stupid enough to put their lives on hold for me for 5 WHOLE minutes!!

I feel angry and hurt, but one thing I know for sure,
blood isn't holy anymore.

it sounds like your family need a good cick up the bum i think when you stop

doing all these things for them it will make them think and see how selfish they are. hope you get well soon

reply to post by digby888


Thanks

nah, I think when I stop doing things for them, I'm the one they consider selfish and they all they just feel sorry for each other *sigh*
My husband thinks it's about time I started acting this way, been going on long enough.

one thing is for sure, they won't be getting more from me, not money and no favors.