Rapture to occur next week..

.. no it Happened .. I have calculated my time wave and the event did happen just 2 weeks ago ..as the wave hit .. I had awoken and now I think I am the 2nd comming and that the Rapture has been rewritten .?.. and that is not joke you can check my last Post .. THEORY OF EVERYTHING for more details..

"Your" time wave? It's not everyones? You're the divine, not anyone else?

Seems like dreams of grandeur to me.

reply to post by mryanbrown


.. I didn't ask your opion.. and I quess you don't believe so why do you attempt to pretend to do so.?.

Well, it's now the middle of "next week" and I still haven't seen or heard of planes falling out of the sky because the pilot was raptured. The town must be inhabited by nothing but sinners, as all the graves in the local graveyard are still undisturbed. Perhaps by week's end?

reply to post by Vonour


If the event happened, are you saying this world is where you ended up at? I'm assuming so because you're here in this world typing your messages. What was your previous world like? Is this one like heaven compared to where you were at?

reply to post by Vonour


I'm not looking for you to ask my opinion. I'm stating that I don't believe you. I'm also stating that you've offered nothing other than numerological nonsense to tout that you're the messiah.

I'm not denying that you're different from others. But that you are probably mistaking the knowledge being presented to you and allowing your ego to influence how said knowledge is filtered to your mind. Allowing you to believe you're special above everyone else.

reply to post by Vonour

Hey Messiah, it's me, John The Baptist! What the hell have you been up to these past couple thousand years?
I ran into ol' Herod and Pontius just a couple of hundred years ago, and the s.o.b's are still arguing over who offed you. Oh well bro'...see ya next century!

reply to post by mryanbrown


.. well you can have your own opion .. but it means nothing to me . just as you
...would stay this to Jesus if you where to have meet him .. you have no belief in the word so your only here to spread disbelief and this is why there is no Unity in the world for individuals closed minded like your self.. I shall waste no time on you for I don't ask for your belief .. or for anyone to follow me or even to believe for it is a question of Faith and I see none in your words .. and I shall turn away from you ....Bless You and Yours may you find your path .. for You are your own savior .. not I ..

reply to post by orionthehunter


.. No I am Saying . that I was Abel .. and I have finally awakend .. to the reality of it . as the wave came just 2 weeks ago ... My brother was Cain .. whom had killed me ... but if you wish for more details it is all in my Theory of Everything Thread .. I see only disbelief .. in this world and none here wish to have a savior maybe we all deserve the Rapture to come again .. I guess everyone would be happier to die over and over and watch the world crumble as 75 percent of the world dies . Is this the future you all wish for .. I come and awaken to see doubt, hate and jeleousy and to be attacked and mocked .. and you have no need of a prophet or saving ..I will only deal with people of Faith and do as my brother mentioned to turn away from those who care not to listen or even know the word.. John Paul .. Jesus/ Paul(ressurected) Arch-Angel Micheal Lord of Gods Army ...
...whom Payed for your sin and his own .. for killing me and bringing me back to stop the Rapture and to save the lives of 75 percent of the world.. and to set those whom are alive and watching and have faith on the path to the Kingdom Of Heaven . .. and not to be caught in the Clouds of Fire...of the Great War the Rapture..

Yet another EPIC FAIL prediction thread... No surprise really... Now let's move along people, nothing to see here...

reply to post by JaxonRoberts



WELL this IS a shame, i was hoping for some Rapture, I even have a great new pair of shoes for the event.......

Hell is gonna be so much more fun....Sigh, can someone in the know actually predict me a proper rapture?
Moonwalks to mall to find a new dress to match shoes. One must look good for such a momentous occassion.

The extremely aberrant weather conditions and increased seismic activity have me believing something is going to give. And soon.

The Event did happen.

Episode 1, season 1 was played on NBC.

reply to post by A boy in a dress

I feel sorry for these people, the rapture is assimilation.
I can understand tho, it's their choice, it's what happens when you cross everything over, inverted. White seems
black and black seems white. White=redish devil. They rule, and it;s the anunaki, the red summer. Bliss is just that,
non existance, you get assimilated into the burning pot.

reply to post by pepsi78


Ok, ok, Pep. The jig is up. You got me. I'm a highly paid cointelpro disinfo agent with the CIA, FBI, and KFC. I am here to make light of a very serious incident which will involve secret spy ops, federal level conspirator agendas, and original recipe fried chicken. This event is to occur in or around the date of the so-called "Rapture."

You and Von, (who may or may not be you with a different user name) have moved me to tears with your poignant and ridiculously long diatribes of crazy. It makes me want to be a better person and let everyone out there know the truth.

I am truly astounded that you were able to so clearly identify my true agenda. You saw through all of my lame jokes and peered into their seedy underbelly. Many kudos to you, citizen. For you are a hero.

- Agent C.S.

reply to post by Vonour

"LITTLE VONOUR!..." (God's voice is deep and roars and rumbles about the heavens)
"... YOU SHOULDN'T BE DOWN THERE, I'M CLEARING THAT PART OF THE UNI'
TODAY"

Li'l Vonour looks up at the cumulonimbus clouds and smiles weakly. "Er, I thought I
would help get the message out -Father" Rays of sunlight play across Vonour's
computer screen as he wait's for the omnipotent's reply.

"Hmmm.... the last time you were down there, they nailed you to a board..." God booms
and far off a flock of birds rise into the air. "... And you know how that caused problems
when you held your pocket-money"

Vonour nods and shows a tight smile.
Then the soft patter of rain is heard and God finishes with "Let's make it a quick one
and call it a 'Velocirapture'!"
Vonour sighs and turns back to his screen.

reply to post by pepsi78


And the queuing isn't a ball of fun, either.
On at the last Rapture Ball... that's the little fling before the
actual drawing of the meak... I was talking to Colonel Parker
who used to manage Elvis.
Being of a large frame, I asked him how he would endure the
queue -if he was still here on Earth.
Taking the celestial cigar from his lips, he croaked "BIAD, I'd
play my favourite tunes to while-away the hours"

I rubbed my permo-wig and straighten my dress as I thought.
"So you'd be clicking your fingers to Mr. Presley's numbers"
I chided and watched his face twist.
"Gimme Bing anyday" the Colonel rasped.

It just goes to show, it takes all sorts.

reply to post by MeSoCorny

It's because strange things do not happen to you MeSoCorny. Only when they happen you will notice.

Hi guys...it's me again...from HEAVEN.

Just wanted to keep you up to date with what's going on up here since I got caught in the rapture.

I found a Unicorn the other day sipping from a chocolate lake, he had a chocolate mustache and we laughed about it. Jesus tells the most amazing stories...he really knows how to captivate a crowd. This guy Lazarus keeps telling people how he died TWICE and brags about it....he smells weird.

GOD is not happy though. He keeps pointing to this huge T.V. and yelling at Benny Hinn...he really doesn't like Benny. It's not cool to talk about Dinosaurs here, people look at you weird. I have to go because we're all gathering around the campfire singing............you guessed it. (pffft)

Haha...King David sucks at guitar.......but the chicks dig him.

I drive a gold Yacht!!!

Talk to you soon.

Originally posted by pepsi78
reply to post by MeSoCorny

 

It's because strange things do not happen to you MeSoCorny. Only when they happen you will notice.

How do you know strange things don't happen to me, Pep? Many strange things happen to me. For one, I didn't get into the best club there is, Heaven. The bouncer kicked me to the curb. Explain that!