Your views on polygamy

reply to post by Annee


Exactly how much money are we talking about?

Originally posted by Lysergic
Can I just have multiple "ladies of interest" why we gotta ruin it by getting married?

Thawts?

Sure.

But you're on your own finding them

Originally posted by trika3000
reply to post by Annee

 

Exactly how much money are we talking about?

I don't know - - - but sometimes wish my daughter would "take the money".

My fault for raising her with integrity

Originally posted by Annee

Originally posted by Lysergic
Can I just have multiple "ladies of interest" why we gotta ruin it by getting married?

Thawts?

Sure.

But you're on your own finding them

I've found them, they just havent found eacother.

Originally posted by Annee

Originally posted by galadofwarthethird
After all women are not attracted to men with money or power, but you will always find them around in places were power and money are....

Lets carefully choose our words - shall we.

I NEVER said women were not attracted to men with money.

I DID say - - the women I know are Not Willing to Give Up Themselves for money.

Marrying a man for his money - - - means basically that he is buying you. It means he Owns you and has expectations of his purchase. If this is what you want - - Go For It!

You misunderstand me, but I understand you, my words are chosen carefully. But like I said you misunderstand what I was saying, so here we go again, yes women are attracted to power and money, it's there function, especially the ones that say they arent, and believe it. But saying all that I really dont care, what women say or anybody says, there actions speak louder. So then you and your daughters can do whatever you want...who am I to judge, I am merely sceptical of everything, So I will believe you, just not all the way. It's your life and I truly dont care what reason anybody is attracted to anybody else, even if you are all about money or whatever else, and I see nothing wrong with it, even if you are. So I wish you and your daughters good luck in whatever you all want.

Now back to the original topic of the thread, polygamy...And my views on it it's not my thing...but it sure is obvious like a penguin in a flock of seagulls that there are people who would prefer this lifestyle, the op and you have made your wishes pretty obvious...and I see nothing wrong with it...so regardless of what Astyanax or I or anybody else said, it will happen and be more widespread in the future...and this is a good thing because I believe people are way to full of # already...so I see no reason to change anybodys mind on this subject...infact it shouldn't be outlawed, because like the war on drugs' it is what it is...you cant stop people from using drugs, you sure as hell wont stop them from whatever marriage practice they want. So let them do what they want, and the birds of a feather will flock together...And who knows maybe females will be more truthful on what they want without outside interests trying to get them to do what they truly dont want to do...Less pretending on all parts and less bull you have to go through, in this mating game, and a lot less future headaches.

Originally posted by galadofwarthethird


You misunderstand me, but I understand you, my words are chosen carefully. But like I said you misunderstand what I was saying, so here we go again, yes women are attracted to power and money, it's there function, especially the ones that say they aren't, and believe it.

I did not misunderstand anything. And you've added Power to Money?

I wasn't talking about YOUR words. A bit self-important - you are?

I only pity you - if these women you describe - are the women in your life.

reply to post by galadofwarthethird

Ultimately ya females will do what is best for them, and males wil do alike, for there intrests... and the end [product] of such accumulated wants and needs... are called societies. So its not regardless of sex or gender it's regarding your sex and gender.

Yes, you are quite right. Biology forces men and women to follow differing reproductive strategies, so their interests differ and often collide. Human societies are shaped by these differences and conflicts, and by our efforts to resolve or mitigate them.

If one is not a sexist, however, one hopes to build a society in which men and women are treated equally and fairly. We can only doing this by considering what is best for society and for individuals of both sexes, without favouring either men or women. That was my meaning.

Astyanax:Polygamy was far more widespread in the past than it is now. Most cultural factors I can think of point towards a decline, not an increase.

Really might want to recheck that...

Unnecessary. It is self-evident. Where in the world is polygamy on the increase? A few backward African and Islamic societies?

All over the world women are becoming more empowered--freer, better educated, gainfully employed and economically independent, exercising their reproductive and human rights in ever-increasing numbers. Such female empowerment is poison to the institution of polygamy, because no sane woman wants to be a chattel, or share her children's birthright with another woman's children.

*

reply to post by Annee

Are there women who go after men with money. Sure. Just like women went to college to find an educated man.

You seem a little fixated on money.

Re-read the post you are alluding to, and you will see I mention three factors: power, wealth and social status. Of these, it is the third, status, that is the clincher; power and money are just means to it. Education, too, correlates well with social status. Women are attracted to men of high real or potential status. That is because, among social primates, status is a marker of reproductive fitness.

Hence women are attracted to such male characteristics as height, intelligence, talent, good looks, physical fitness and prowess, courage, self-confidence and other selectively useful traits, through the deployment of which men gain status among their peers and demonstrate their reproductive fitness.

Women are also attracted to kindness, loyalty and love of children, because men who show these traits are liable to stick around and help raise the children they father.

Shockingly for female chauvinists, women are, in fact, preferentially attracted to these different sets of traits at different times in their menstrual cycles. In other words, women are programmed to have children by selectively fit men and co-opt 'nurturing' men to raise them:

Menstrual cycle alters face preference Nature #399, June 1999

Women's Preferences for Male Behavioral Displays Change Across the Menstrual Cycle Psychological Science #15, March 2004

Partnership status and the temporal context of relationships influence human female preferences for sexual dimorphism in male face shape Proceedings of the Royal Society B, vol. 269 no. 1496, June 2002

One in every ten children raised in wedlock is a secret bastard:

Because of concealed ovulation, internal fertilization, and female infidelity, human parental certainty is asymmetrical: unlike females, who are always 100% certain of maternity, males can never be certain of paternity. Current estimates of extra-pair paternity (paternity by someone other than the putative and domestic father, or cuckoldry) are between 1 and 30%, with the best estimate at about 10% (Baker & Bellis, 1995; Cerda-Flores et al., 1999; Neale, Neale, & Sullivan, 2002; Sasse et al., 1994; Sykes & Irven, 2000). In other words, approximately 1 in 10 children are the product of female infidelity. -- Platek, Shackleford, Eds., Female Infidelity and Paternal Uncertainty: Evolutionary Perspectives on Male Anti-Cuckoldry Tactics, 2006, Cambridge University Press Link to excerpt

As for money, it just happens to be a good status indicator in capitalist societies. Though women throughout history have always been attracted to 'good providers', and still are. You can't fight nature.

As any woman knows (or should know) being with a High Profile man - - - will be the hardest money you ever earn. The women I know - aren't willing to give up themselves.

Yes, indeed. There are plenty of lazy and unambitious women in the world. Most, however, understand as well as men that success is something you have to work and make sacrifices for.

You can pull any statistic you want out of your butt - - - my experiences are "live in person" - - - over 60+ years of real life experience.

The statistics I quote are not 'pulled out of my butt', madam. They are all from respectable, validated sources. I included the sources this time, since you clearly haven't bothered to follow the links in my last reply to you.

OH! Could it be "man in question" is attracted to Bimbos?

I think your statistics are more related to man thinking with his "little head".

You appear to be some kind of embittered female chauvinist. To have lived so long and learned so little: how pitiable.

Polyandry Is the practice of a woman taking multiple husbands i.e. the opposite of what we usually think of when we think polygamy, which is more properly called polygyny
Apparently It is practiced by the Masai people, the people of Bhūtan and in e few other places as well.

I know of quite a few of these relationships amongst some Wiccans I know, seems to be kind of a trend in that group...but I assume this has to do with the divinity ascribed to womanhood in it.

Most of the time they fizzle out, but I know at least one long term threesome that has lasted quite a few years, even with kids involved. I guess it works for them, and neither male seems to be on the "outside" of the relationship.

Wouldn't work for me though (nor would having two wives)...

I live in an area where polygamy is not uncommon. I see what it does to women, children, families. It is cruel and very much akin to slavery. Women and children are traded off to the most favored male members. Brothers find they have lost their wives and children to a younger more favorable brother to a "prophet" because of some imagined slight. These women have no say so in who they are wed to in a "celestial" marriage. No family owns their home, it is church property. This is all about control and power. These women have no real relationship with their husbands. They are starved for something as small as a kind word and a hand on the shoulder (with no sexual implications). Jealousy is very evident in that the children of "sister-wives" suffer mistreatment from sister-mothers. Education is kept from members so that they are more easily controlled. These men know that if they get a young lady with child she is easier to handle and less likely to leave and I have heard men remark about young wives -- "a new car is better than a used car". Celestial wives are not legally married so they are on public assistance and this leaves their husbands with time free to administer to their "spiritual needs". I find the off the cuff remarks about polygamy offensive. I see no culture that benefits from polygamy.

reply to post by Astyanax


"Unnecessary. It is self-evident. Where in the world is polygamy on the increase? A few backward African and Islamic societies? All over the world women are becoming more empowered--freer, better educated, gainfully employed and economically independent, exercising their reproductive and human rights in ever-increasing numbers. Such female empowerment is poison to the institution of polygamy, because no sane woman wants to be a chattel, or share her children's birthright with another woman's children."

Yes your right but all that is based on the female nature, and it is fickle. But ultimately some paterns are always there, here is a saying I picked up in the more understanding civilised societies by the more high class citizens and the lower class citizens as well "poor girls are looking for rich guys, rich girls are looking for richer guys" So ultimately being more empowered --freer, better educated, gainfully employed and ecologically independent, and exercising their reproductive and human rights in ever-increasing numbers. All that just means finding richer guys, and we all cant be rich now can we, this is a pyramid after all..... so the low road and the high road will cross at the intersection of human nature, and we will see....But enough with all that, I see this thing going in many ways including worser ways then polygamy...so to each his own...But I also see it going in better ways then what it is now, and like all things, lines in the sand are drawn, and stances taken....but only time will tell.

Originally posted by Annee

Originally posted by galadofwarthethird


You misunderstand me, but I understand you, my words are chosen carefully. But like I said you misunderstand what I was saying, so here we go again, yes women are attracted to power and money, it's there function, especially the ones that say they aren't, and believe it.

I did not misunderstand anything. And you've added Power to Money?

I wasn't talking about YOUR words. A bit self-important - you are?

I only pity you - if these women you describe - are the women in your life.

Wow stick your head in the sand often do you? Are women in all walks of life that much different from one another? the majority seem to be like you, or at least it seems that way. But no I am not self-important I just follow the path of least headaches when it comes to women, so yes I am the bogieman to a lot of women, or at least it seems that way....silence truly is golden. Peace out, there is nothing more to say.

From now on - - I'm only interested in discussing Modern Plural Marriage - - in which all partners are equal.

I have no interest in discussing Patriarchal religions or cultures. I consider those to be about religion & culture first - - not polygamy.

In these Religious/Cultural situations - - - there's just as many women treated as 2nd class citizens in mono marriages. Personally - I think those in a polygamous group are probably better off.

reply to post by searching411


And what area would this be since it's got this religious powerstructure tone to it....I am guessing somewhere in the states...but could be anywere from middle east to the outer west or north. Just for curiosity to check up on in a later time when I gots nothings beter to do. thx

reply to post by Annee

From now on - - I'm only interested in discussing Modern Plural Marriage - - in which all partners are equal.

That is not the thread topic.

But if you don't want to discuss the topic, be welcome. Personally, I'm still waiting to hear what the OP has to say to all this. The OP is an interesting person.

Bah.

Regarding statistics. It costs money. You do not do a statistical study without funding.

Who or what is backing that funding? What is the purpose of the study? How was the study conducted and by whom?

Was there an agenda? Did the researcher need the study to lean a certain way? Federal funding can be determined on statistical findings - - - which would have great influence on how statistics lean.

Statistical studies are done for a reason. Unless you have all the background on a statistical study - - it really can't be used as valid proof of anything.

I once read a statistical study - - - claiming children of single mothers do poorly in school. Interesting thing about that study - - - economic factors were not part of the study. Someone had an agenda.

Originally posted by Astyanax
reply to post by Annee

 

From now on - - I'm only interested in discussing Modern Plural Marriage - - in which all partners are equal.

That is not the thread topic.

But if you don't want to discuss the topic, be welcome. Personally, I'm still waiting to hear what the OP has to say to all this. The OP is an interesting person.

It also does not say anything about Religion and Culture. In the case of Religion and Culture - - - is polygamy the primary issue?

Are we discussing Polygamy - - or Religion and Culture?

From a woman's point of view - - in a Paternal Totalitarian Culture - - - multiple wives might fair better then wives in a monogamous marriage. True - there might be a wife that thinks she is in control - - - but then again - there might be sister-wives who become great friends and companions.

Actually - I watched a movie where two women in one of these cultures became lovers. It was a foreign movie by an Iraqi film maker.

reply to post by galadofwarthethird


Utah, Arizona, Nevada -- Have you not been watching the news -- Warren Jeff, Colorado City, Arizona and their new compound in Texas. Jeff has refused extradition to Texas for trial and he may be released from Arizona prison shortly. His followers were even on Oprah when all this stuff came to light. Look up "the lost boys" and see the down side of young men who are not favored and how they are thrown out with the trash with no money and no way to support themselves. It is not only about the girls.

reply to post by searching411


So - - we should discuss the Extremism of polygamy?

Maybe there is another side.

reply to post by Annee

You have no real-life experience of polygamous societies, have you?

I have. I lived and worked in the Middle East for several years.

In addition, polygamy is permitted by the statutes of my country, but for Muslims only.

You are living in a dreamworld modelled on bodice-ripping harem romance novels like The Panther and the Pearl

The reality is frightful.

Incidentally, a desperate trick used by men in my country when they want to marry again and their wives won't give them a divorce: get circumcised, become a Muslim and marry the new girlfriend anyway.

That is the sort of 'empowerment' that polygamy affords woman.