OP, reading these replies it looks like many can relate, several are willing to be a friend and you've received some excellent ideas. I hope you
pursue you idea and do something with it. It doesn't hurt to try.
Personally, I have found having friends to be way over rated. People by nature see to prey on each other. I've known way too many people I thought
were friends but over time I realized they were just around to get what they could.
A lot of people in high school have friends they think will be around forever. After graduation a few immediately disappear to their family business,
college or military, poof! and they're gone. A few will hang out a few more years. By age 25 - 27 most guys have lost all their friends to the evil
Wedding Altar -brrr!!!- Marriage has its own priorities.
Meanwhile maybe you've made friends at night school, work of the local bar but they just come and go. When it comes down to it, most people are more
like associates. You know them for a while and life goes on. I think you are in a majority of people. Most of us don't have friends, and most of us
feel like losers if our heads allow that kind of trip.
Something I realized is the so-called Winners of the World are the actual freaks. You know the types. The ones society tells us are the beautiful
people, the chosen ones. We are raised in a society of other peoples pre-formed notions in place to guide & control us. Every high school across
America has the football team and the cliche handsome & talented Johnny Quarterback all-American type with his girlfriend Susy Creamcheese, who is the
head Cheerleader. She's so pretty. They are destined to be King & Queen of the Prom.
This young couple, this scenario is acted out in schools all across America. Someone else's idea of beauty or talent or athletic prowess. All the
other teen beans, uncomfortable in their very skin and suffering from the hell that being a teenager is, have this shoved down their throats. They are
made to feel like they are less, like they are not as pretty or charismatic or talented or whatever. And that is wrong. This is part of the control
that we go through.
Now look at the schools. Say the average HS holds 2500 students. Each school has one Johnny Quarterback / Susy Creamcheese couple that are displayed
like the topping of a wedding cake. That is 2498 to 2.
2,498 students in every average HS have these 2 cliche stereotypes propped up to ooh and ahh upon. Know what I realized. WE are in the majority, the
everyday regular people. It's those 2 up on the stage, in the spotlight, that are the 'freaks' of the show. We are trained early on to feel
inferior and lacking. And that is wrong.
I saw the light and I hope you do too. You don't have to let others rent space in your head. You are NOT a loser. God does not make junk. You are a
good person. We are all unique; we beat the odds simply by being born. Me, I'm not going to let the fake machinations of living dictate who I am or
how I feel about myself. Just like you, I am a unique individual with my own thoughts and views, good points and bad points.
The example I used seems to repeat throughout life. That's why we have millions of people running at top speed through their lives, blind as bats,
chasing the brass ring that someone else is always holding just out of their grasp. Our lives are full of false heroes and huge distractions. It's
always the other guy getting the promotion, the new car, the beautiful wife. But it's all BS. They are miserable, unfulfilled, empty. Wasting their
lives running the rat race, getting no where fast, like a gerbil on a exercise wheel. Screw that.
Hold your head up, follow your dreams, let your light shine. This is your time, right here, right now. I hope things go well for you.