I feel as if I am drifting through life as an anonymous specter, without a home and no family and no friends, a disconnected cipher alienated from the currents of reality,

I am a loser.

Can I ask you all a question?

If a lonely loner has a brilliant idea but no one cares what he thinks does he really exist?

My only dream is to someday clean the spills off the floor at a local supermarket. And on my walk home I will wonder what other people are feeling as I pass them in the street, imagining what it would be like if they were my friends.

I am a dreamer.

Cheers to the white nights illuminated by my unreality.

you really have no friends? just a few quality ones would suffice, none at all?
maybe you think too much...I have the same problem. Its been mine since I was really young, always felt like I was an outsider, not part of the "gang". Do you use the computer too much? that could be a problem too.

You are not a loser, not having the things you listed does not make you a loser. I don't know your situation but it sounds like you are having a rough time. I have felt this way in my life and I just kept thinking positive and I got thru it. Just think good things will happen as silly as it sounds, it works. I use to be very negative because it seemed like things always happened to me and nobody else. I feel the things I have been through made me stronger.

Also you asked

If a lonely loner has a brilliant idea but no one cares what he thinks does he really exist?

I won't call you a loser because I don't think you are one and yes you do exist even if nobody cares about your ideas. It's your idea and if it matters to you that is all that should matter imo. I come up with all kinds of ideas and nobody cares, it doesn't mean I don't exist.

What is your idea? I would like to hear it.

I encourage you to find a community, those who share similar interests with you, in your local area. You may feel alone but you are not, the decision to be alone is yours as is the choice to become part of something larger it simply takes action on your part.

I wish you the best.

OP, I could have written that post myself. I don't have a single friend and haven't had one for many years. It's not like I don't try to make friends. Most of the time I'm ok with it, but sometimes I wish I had just one friend to talk to. It really sucks when you have something wonderful happen and have no one to tell. Or when you have something really bad happen and no one to talk to.

I will be your friend. My name is Josh. I am very empathic. Not empathic in the sense that magical beams shoot out to decode someones inner emotions, but in the sense that I can very easily use my imagination to picture myself as someone else and attempt to mimic the same emotions that they would have in a given situation.

I am asexual although not in the sense that I can reproduce with myself, more so that I choose neither sex to mate/pairbond/fornicate with.

Can we be friends AProphet1233?

Life is often a struggle, more so for some than others.

I have moved around in my life quite a bit, losing track of people I've met and trying to hold on to those I really value.

It really doesn't work though since over time you will lose track of those you had such a good rapport with. It's difficult to maintain that same friendship you had over such a long distance. Sort of why most long-distance relationships do not work. It's not the same anymore and you experience different things and develop in other directions.

With all my moving I got fairly good at integrating into new communities and gaining acquaintances. Yet I would trade all that for that one good friend to really talk to. It's all well and good to have friends but I feel you can really open up to only a minority that's hard to find.

I would suggest going to a sports club or regular meeting group to get to know new people. What about the neighbours?

There's a lot of ways to find people, but it's often a difficult and hurting business finding those that you can relate with.

Here's the golden rule: Be yourself.

There was once a time in my life when I had friends everywhere. I would spend weekends filled with activities and gatherings. Covered dish night at one friends house, then to gather at another's for a movie or show; it was like a dream.

Slowly my friends all died. None of them lived past 42 and I was mostly younger. I still have some pictures to prove to myself they were real, and to be honest most of them I still have conversations in my mind when I think about them. They still make me smile and I often hope that they take pleasure in being around me today. Now I am a recluse. I cannot communicate with people who want to take, use, and lie all the while pulling me in like some ugly consumption of Spirit.

I try to engage others, to embrace their ideas and to offer up my own thoughts in an attempt at this connection, but I keep running into the worst of us now. It is like the last true hearts left the world and I am doing my penance for some awful deed or something.

I typically pour myself out when I meet someone and maybe that is why I fail at it so miserably. I guess it is because in the Past this worked and the people I met did the same.

Now if I can only figure out how to get rid of the road out front, or move somewhere there are no roads.

See! Cheer up! LOL

"I have never found a companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers. A man thinking or working is always alone, let him be where he will"


- Henry David Thoreau

lucky you


most friends or aquaintenances will tap you strength, power. wallet

i only have one singular 'friend'
my daughter & grand kids are not friends i am their immediate ancestor

it is best to walk your own path, and any true 'friends' will uncannily attract to you,
so don't press the subjective 'need' to have a 'Friends' type of group that constantly feeds off each other --- that gets tedious very quickly....
thats my take on your situation, take it or leave it

[edit on 30-8-2010 by St Udio]

Originally posted by AProphet1233

If a lonely loner has a brilliant idea but no one cares what he thinks does he really exist?

I am drawing the assumption that you have some interesting ideas. I like ideas. Would you be kind and share them with us on ATS?

"Beneath this mask there is more than flesh. Beneath this mask there is an idea, Mr. Creedy, and ideas are bulletproof." - V, V for Vendetta (film)

There are 6 billion of us humans in the world, I'm sure you can find many people that you could get along with.

what's funny is that I saw the title of this thread "I don't have any friends" and then when I clicked on it, above your screen name there is a green bar that says "One of your friends" so apparently you have at least one friend.

[edit on 30-8-2010 by filosophia]

If you have nobody to tie you down, maybe you should go on an adventure, like backpacking through Europe or Asia. Get lost in African villages, helping the poor. Not only will you make lots of friends on an adventure such as those listed, but it will also give your life purpose, while broadening your horizons. Go spin your wheels and live life to the fullest.

If it is cost you are worrying about, worry no longer as it isn't that expensive and you can pick up odd jobs here in there to pay for hostiles. If you are volunteering to help the poor, I'm sure that the village/orginaztion you wind up in, will cover most costs.

When someone is alone for a while, they tend to lose socializing skills, which in turn makes it harder for them to make friends. If you were to go on an adventure, such as backpacking in Europe or volunteering in Asia, Africa or LatAm, you would quickly regain those socialization skills and people will once again be attracted to you. More importantly, yout self esteem should skyrocket, which will ultimately help you with socialization.

Anyway, that's what I would do if I was in your shoes.

--airspoon

[edit on 30-8-2010 by airspoon]