reply to post by AidanK
Hi there! I can't really tell you what to do, but I can tell you my story. For 14 years, I was married to a "preacher." During this time, it was
crammed down our throats that all other religions except ours was going to hell... and especially you Catholics! lol!
Don't be offended. I'm
joking yet telling the truth at the same time.
Somewhere around the 10 year mark of our marriage, I really started questioning my beliefs. A lot of things didn't make sense to me and I had known
that all along, but I never really stopped to think about it... just went on blindly believing what I had been told to believe. Also, church
depressed the hell out of me. I couldn't figure out why. I couldn't understand why in the world a place that was supposed to help me feel
uplifted, was making me feel flat out horrible about myself. It wasn't too long before I stopped going to church completely and then within a few
years, I divorced my preacher husband. I couldn't take it anymore. It was the best move I ever made.
Here is what I have found out since being out of church. Nobody can tell you what to believe. Faith is a personal thing and something that you have
to figure out for yourself. Now, I haven't turned atheist. I still believe there is a higher power... whether it be God/Spirit/Universe or
whatever, but there are a lot of things I can't explain. I do know that God is not supposed to cause confusion, yet there are all kinds of
contradictions in the Bible... the King James Version anyway. And I'm not dissing the Bible... that still feels wrong, lol. But many a Christian
has told me that it doesn't contradict itself, but it does, and they know it and usually don't have an explanation. Maybe somebody on here does so
don't go to attacking me because I said that. I merely talking about the ones I've had experience with.
Anyway, now that I have gotten away from church, I have found that I am closer to God/Spirit/Universe or whatever you want to call it. I'm spiritual
now. I wasn't before. I'll admit that I did go through a phase where I was close to being an atheist. Got tired of praying. Didn't feel like it
was doing any good at all. But now that I've meditated and took quiet time to really block out everything worldly and just go within myself, I
realize that there is SOMETHING there. There is something bigger than us. I don't know what it is.
I don't know why bad things happen to innocent people. I can't explain that, so if this post doesn't help, I apologize. But I can tell you that
you will never get anywhere by believing what someone else has told you believe. I don't care how many hundreds of years this belief system has been
around. You need to take some time away and decide for yourself what it is you believe. I was almost an atheist before I started meditating and
experiencing whatever the higher power is for myself and after that, I KNEW that there is something much bigger than us and in control. I can't
explain it, but I feel that it exists. However, I wont criticize people who decide that there is nothing there... that we are alone. I don't
believe it, but I wont push what I believe on anyone else. Had that done to me for years and it sucked. I refuse to be a hypocrite myself.