Is it currently a social taboo to say ''hello'' to strangers ?

reply to post by Sherlock Holmes


It is very dangerous to talk to strangers or for strangers to talk to you.

It is usually a precursor to a violent act.

Notice how they ask for the time and end up stabbing and mugging you?

They may want to rape and murder or steal from you.

When I go out I usually have a hostile frown on me and walk straight ahead ignoring everyone and looking like someone NOT be spoken or interfered with.

I URGE EVERYONE TO DO THE SAME.

IT COULD SAVE YOU FROM DEATH OR BEING MURDERED AND RAPED.

reply to post by Sherlock Holmes


Yes, back in the good old 70's it was cool to say hi, hows it going and peace and mean it.

People, in my own humble opinion were more human.

(Read David Jacob's "The Threat" - we may not all be human right now).

Since the mid eighties I began to notice a real change, a real difference in people.

It's almost like the pod people have taken over, look straight ahead, no emotion, no eye contact.

If you smile or say hello or good morning, the other person will react strangely, like you have committed a social error.

Not everyone, but it's getting more and more every year.

That is my own observation. I live and predominately work and travel in the suburbs of a large midwest city.

Now, my son who lives in a small town, says everyone waves hi, calls him by name and even ask him to drop by when he has time for a beer.

I am friendly with my neighbors, but it took a long time cultivating them.

Often times, people have become so over worked and over stressed with both world and family problems they are walling themselves off.

Yes, again in my opinion, the seventies were a magical time, when people were much friendlier and open.

We're becoming like robots.

[edit on 15-8-2010 by ofhumandescent]

reply to post by Tarrok


actually it is considered being really impolite if not saying "hi" when meeting a fellow hiker

on the other way round people in the city think it is impolite to bide a quick "hi" when passing by
it intrudes into their privacy.

maybe free space gives you enough privacy to step over such lines?

reply to post by orange-light


Haha, I don't hike much after I had an overload of hiking when I was younger. Thinking about it, I guess it makes sense though. Not only are you probably staring at each other for a while before you're close enough for a greeting but you're usually also the only ones there.

It's sad that we're not more friendly in cities. There's a lot of fear and that's what drives this taboo. This fear is propelled by the MSM. As someone who hasn't looked into this topic much, that's my knee-jerk observation.

Luckily we have forums like these where I can say "Hi Orange-Light" and get a friendly response back!

All the best,
T

reply to post by Tarrok


neither do i - but when walking mom.s dog when i am with her i have the pleasure to renew these polite experiences.

people in cities are much more afraid of other people - as you said MSM - they tell us everyday that environment is unfriendly and dangerous.
so a "hi" can possibly mean "hi hand over your purse"

lets have a closer look at the fear of pedophilia - sure a very serious subject and certainly to fear - but as somebody mentioned it before: adults doesn.t dare to say "hi" to under aged kids coz they don.t want to be stigmatized as pedophilias - coz MSM tells us so much about it. even kids don.t dare to say "hello" to adults.
isn.t that crazy?

so hi tarrok

reply to post by orange-light


You're right and I've noticed this 'stranger suspicion' everywhere I've lived. I mean, I'm 22 and try to always carry a friendly disposition. The best responses have always come from elderly ladies who smile back or thank when I give up a seat or hold a door.

Nevertheless, one thing I have noticed is that a quick smile and nod is the best way to acknowledge someone without getting any fearful responses back. Especially in waiting rooms, unless there's something to initiate a conversation with like a TV.

I've noticed I could always talk to strangers when I went windsurfing. Again, it's like I said earlier you have something in common, something to connect with. Just like hiking.

As for kids, yeah that's super dangerous. Even for me and I'm not even old yet! It's terrible but what can you do? Just stay friendly and hope they will return in kind.

I live in Chicago and you can't just befriend anyone. A lot of people will want something from you (mostly money). It's just not worth it to walk around like an idiot trusting everyone in big cities like Chicago. You just don't initiate strangers on the street. Now in a club or a place with people like you, it's all good. But unless you want to be annoyed and wast some time, you won't be saying hello to strangers in the city of Chicago. Maybe the cashier or some other strangers but NOT people on the street.

Originally posted by orange-light
when i wrote my post yesterday i got the idea that greeting each other in the countryside or in parks - much nature, overwhelming nature all around you - you might want to show the other individual that it is safe to pass you and get yourself assured that it is safe for you as well.

maybe an ancient instinct?

just an idea.

I think you're right.

In fact, that is probably the main motivation for me saying hello to a stranger when I walk in the countryside.

I'm trying to convey to them that I'm friendly, and wish them no harm.

Although, maybe It's a bit paranoid to assume that they'd be weary of me ?

[edit on 16-8-2010 by Sherlock Holmes]

Originally posted by Indellkoffer
It's culture. In the South and West, it's common to nod or "howdy" someone on the streets. I'll often "howdy" the janitorial staff or yard work staff as well. Up North and East they look at me a little askance, so I'm more likely to nod and smile.

But of course, a goodole Texas drawl and a "howdy" often gets a nice nod back.

Is that among everyone, or just the older generation ?

I definitely notice a generational trend in people's attitudes to this.

Another thing I noticed this morning is that even while bringing in the trash can from the side of the road and saying a friendly hello to neighbors and people walking their dog, I hardly get anything back but suspicious looks.

Of course I only live here for a short time but come on, I'm trying to be nice here!

Having said that, I have had people return the hello and bind me in conversation. I suspect that's because I was moving the trash bin, signaling I live here or in the vicinity and thus can be trusted a little.

While I can understand some concern when faced with rude teenagers, I am in my twenties but still seem to be classed under that 'label'.

I have always said 'hello' to people in many different locations.... I usually find that a smile helps and more often than not people are more than willing to have a conversation or just talk to someone...

We live in a world DOMINATED by tech and short snippetts of info wether on TWITter or other social networking crap sites and I thnik that the art of communication is being and has been lost from many !!!

Just go out and try saying hello to someone.. be confident, positive and smile..... you never know who you might meet......

Always follow the saying
'do to others as you would want done to yourself..'

Cheers
PurpleDOG UK

reply to post by EnlightenUp


One of the problems appears to be that everybody seems to be suspicious and fearful of people, largely due to high profile media coverage of crimes, anti-social behaviour and other nefarious activity.

If people stop watching tv news or reading papers, then they become less weary of the dangers that they perceive they are subject to.

People have murders, rapes, assaults shoved down their throat by tv and newspapers, so they get an exaggerated idea of the likelihood of being a victim of one of these crimes.

Don't get me wrong, there are obviously people who are unfortunate enough to fall victim to these crimes, but the sad fact is that many people spend time worrying about an event that may actually never happen to them.



[edit on 16-8-2010 by Sherlock Holmes]

This thread reminds me of a game my dad and I used to play. I grew up in a fairly rural area and, when the weather was nice, there were often older people sitting out on their porch or on lawn chairs in their yard. My dad and I would honk the horn and wave (no regard to whether or not we knew them) and see if they waved back. We were pretty close to batting 1.000 on it, but I always noticed that it seemed more like an automatic response and was immediately followed by a look of confusion about who the hell these people were that were honking at them. Now I live just outside of a major city and I keep threatening my wife that I'm going to start playing the game again.

Originally posted by Sherlock Holmes
reply to post by Blazer

 

Blazer,
That's a strange, yet highly believable, story.

A lot of people seem to not just dislike interactions with their neighbours, but actively seek to avoid them !

Although, are you absolutely sure you didn't do anything that may have upset her previously ?

Heh, I don't think so. I don't venture out of the house too often (in fact I have only had to fill my gas tank twice within the past 6 months), so I doubt I could have run into her on the street or anywhere else. I usually say "hi" or "howdy" to folks but I have noticed in the past couple of years that people have stopped saying hi to others or returning greetings with eyes down, slight head nod, instead of a cheerful reply like in days past.

Another thing to consider is that some people are just self-absorbed and genuinely rude and uncaring.

Even in a controlled situation such as interacting with a shop worker, many people will just completely ignore any kind of communication, other than a few mono-syllabic grunts.

I always say ''hello'' to a cashier or shop worker when I am being served, but I think I may be in the minority here.

EDIT: Double Post.


[edit on 16-8-2010 by Sherlock Holmes]

reply to post by Tarrok


you are the suspicious new guy, they are aware that you are living there, but don.t know how your are.

i am living in a small "villiage" in the north of berlin, it is part of berlin but managed to preserve its village character. i am a friendly person who loves to get to know her neighbors, but beside the young lady in my house nobody talks to me
i am nodding, smiling, saying hello but the guys here prefer to keep their own company.

before i moved here i lived a bit more south (still in berlin, still in the same borough i am in now)
distance 3.5 km - a little settlement of terrace houses - i knew everyone, everyone chatted to me.

when we first moved their back in 2000 we were all nearly in the same situation, newly moved in, small kids

people said hi to each other, that.s it

than i established a monthly ladies night at a local italian restaurant – yay that.s was the key
the girls went out together, chatted and the guys got friendly to with each other so later on it was like living in a big family.

still miss that – may i curse my ex now?

reply to post by Sherlock Holmes




do the cashier notice your friendliness?
i usually also say hi and treat them as human beings, but i realized that some supermarket bosses don.t like that.

there was that nice cashier at the local supermarket who mysteriously disappeared.
she always had had a friendly word for everybody at the check out counter and now she is gone and replaced by some grumbly dragon

reply to post by orange-light


Yeah it's fairly difficult for me here as well. The community here is the typical urban sprawl that the Americans will know.

I had some really friendly neighbours when we bought the house originally but they have moved since then. The new neighbours in that house are very reclusive and seem to always want to retreat and cut conversations short when I start them.

Same thing with the neighbour on the other side. He lost his wife to cancer but two months later he's involved with his new big love and they hardly ever talk, they never seem to have the time.

It's interesting but sad at the same time. People are just more private these days and it takes a lot to break that ice and get them to a personable level. Just like what you did with your Ladies Night. That's always a great way to get everyone involved.

Ex cursing is sanctifying but the best remedy is to try and set your sights on your next goal, whatever that may be.

Easier said than done though, I know. Hah!

reply to post by Tarrok


oh cursing the ex now and then refreshes me

still focusing on the new life

just don.t give up being friendly with the neighbors, maybe they will think you are a bit eccentric which isn.t the worst

as a girl it is sometimes easier
other girls talk easier to girls than to boys - they never know what the guy is up to ……

maybe the MSM.s goal is to get us more and more into privacy , sitting alone in front of a TV set and get our daily dosage of mind control.

people who are talking to each other aren.t that easy to be controlled …… just a thought