Should I go with my "Master Plan"?

There's a girl I'm writing to from a prison. She's my type and she's want I want in a relationship. A woman who is social, humorous, and want's to have a family. I plan on joining the U.S. Army around next year and she is released from prison in 2015. One question on my chest is should I wait for her? We're both going to be occupied and on schedules with no free time for quite a while. This isn't the first time I dated women who were locked up. I dated girls who had problems and it just went down South very fast. One reason is long distance relationship. The second is that we never really met before. This is so confusing. Can someone help me out here.

One big question to be asked here.

1. What is she in jail for? You don't need to tell us, but YOU need to know. You also need to know the circumstances around the incident/s. Is this something that is likely to happen again?

As far as a "master plan" goes though, a bit premature before really getting to know this person as a "real" person yet, if you only know her through written contact. Get to know her first, THEN make your decisions...

2015 is a ways off, and your Army experiences will change YOU too, so don't try and box yourself in here, for no reason. You may meet someone else in the real world within these 5 years.... For all you know, she's writing to LOTS of guys from prison (makes sense, gives you options for places to go when you get released)...

[edit on 20-7-2010 by Gazrok]

If the "Master Plan" involves continuing destructive behavior, like relationships with chicks in prison, then NO, don't go with that.

There are plenty of manipulative females to push you around that are not locked up. They may even let you have real sex with them every now and then.





[edit on 19-7-2010 by Signals]

Run away..run FAR away.
Like there aren't enough women NOT in prison to choose from?
Get your own life together, stop ALL CONTACT with women who are locked up..and imho you will find happiness.
Any woman in prison is lonely as heck and would say anything, make any promises, just so some nice guy is waiting for her when she gets out.
I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw her.
:shk:

reply to post by Romantic_Rebel


Hey

I don't think you'd have too much trouble finding a chick that you can be with NOW baby

Plus, in my experience, long distance relationships have the odds stacked heavily against them
Not all of them, some do succeed but it really has to be worked hard at in order to keep the relationship alive....

Why waste all those years waiting for someone you've never even met yet ?? Naw, enjoy your life, have some fun, I'm sure there's a real romantic, pretty babe just waiting for you

Anyway baby, whatever you decide to do, hope it all turns out cool ....

yup, just be confident. you are sure to find the right girl

Thanks for the reply's everyone. I wrote her a letter to tell her I want to be friends. Right now I'm not ready for a woman in prison. I need to study and get an shape anyway.

You definetly made a good decision. I can understand you feeling bad for these woman and what not, what they are trouble. And I would hate to see you waste 5 years of your life on waiting on her. There are so many other woman out there.

Just remember, you dont need to save anyone. It seems to me that you like to be these womans "knight in shining armor." But you deserve a good girl.

Here is her picture. What do you guys think of her? I believe she's gorgeous.

reply to post by Romantic_Rebel


I hope you got her permission to post her picture..
It's sounds like you are still hooked and haven't made a definite decision.
Better work on that.

reply to post by AccessDenied


Well I don't think I need her permission. No, I'm not hooked on her. Just trying to establish a friendship.

Originally posted by Romantic_Rebel
reply to post by AccessDenied

 

Well I don't think I need her permission. No, I'm not hooked on her. Just trying to establish a friendship.

A friendship can only be a friendship if both agree that is what is is and work to keep it at that level.
If she has aspirations of MORE than friendship..well

reply to post by AccessDenied


I see what your saying to me. Who knows what will happen. Hopefully she can be mature enough to get on with her life and live it to the fullest.

I'm not too worried for you, you have plenty of time to meet others in that duration, so don't put up any walls to other possibilities. I'm sure you'll find a nice girl (or more) in the next few years, so no need for artificial limits....

Just remember, you dont need to save anyone. It seems to me that you like to be these womans "knight in shining armor." But you deserve a good girl.

Don't I know that...I've been accused of having a "hero" complex by every one of my wife's girlfriends, and took me some time to realize they were on to something. Of course, that doesn't stop me or my cape...

I really think you need to think about why you are attracted to women who are in prison. (And I do think she is pretty, btw) I've heard of this before the way women are atttracted to men in prison, for example. One gal 'fell in love' with Gary Gilmore before he was exceuted. I believe they married. She went around saying, "You just can't understand that, can you?" Well, I think I can. She enjoyed the rush and the attention.

I'm not saying that about YOU, so don't take offense, but I am saying that being attracted to prisoners isn't the most healthy thing you could do. I wonder if part of it is because they are inaccessible to you? I mean, your relationship consists of words only. You don't have to try out and/or risk anything else.

I say this with some experience. I had a year long relationship with someone I'd just met once across country, letters only. We decided we were in love. I moved across country. We got married and had a kid. But it really wasn't a smart thing to do. We didn't really know each other well and should have worked some things out, like, for example, religion. To make a lomng story short, she committed suicide and left me with the kid.

Be careful.

Stop watching all those womens prison movies on Cinemax, those places arent nearly as exciting as they would like you to believe.

Sounds like your gal has quite a long stint to pull, must have been for something pretty severe. In all seriousness I would tread lightly and be very careful, prisons are full of desperate and lonely people with a lot of time on their hands, including some of the slickest con artists you will find.

One minute you are in love, the next minute you are sending her money or walking into a womens prison with a keester full of meth.

Best to leave it alone.

reply to post by Romantic_Rebel



Their all gorgeous till you've lived with em six months ...

Love is blinding Daniel-son.

Have you ever considered that love finds us ? The more we actively persue it the more we push it away. The universe replicates what we "think" we have, ... or have not.

Thats why often guys can go a long time without suitors, yet once they get a girlfriend the flood gates open. I think this has to do with mental attitude and confidence, once you have a gf you don't care what other girls think, and act naturaly.

This is the lesson for today,

Now paint my fence !!!

reply to post by IntastellaBurst


Paint your face? I know what all of your trying to say to me. Trust me I have been with women with problems before and have known people who dated women with problems. Most likely a friendship will come from it. I doubt anything else of the sorts. She doesn't seem like a keeper to me.

R_R - she was obviously in prison for doing a bad action.

Love as Bursty has said, is blinding. Well from what I hear. You won't see her bad faults...but do remember, one day you will...and you may regret it.

I can't actually tell you what to do or what not to do. It's your decision.
But a woman in prison?

I don't think that's good news :shk:

If you do...be careful mate.

reply to post by BlackPoison94


I can see her faults. What else would she be in prison for? Love is a mysterious word. Hopefully I can find it one day. Thanks for asking me to take it easy. Being pen pals is good enough with me.