Living in the Present

I have been thinking on this subject for some time now and I've read The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle and a few other books along my way on this subject, but never have I experienced actual living in the now to the extent that I did the other day while driving home from Sedona.

I had been talking with family members about it and that sparked my desire to experiment with it again.

As I sat in the car driving along a 30 mile straightaway with no other traffic in sight, I started thinking about forgetting my past. How neat it would be to not be carrying all the 'stories' and negative experiences of my past! And then I started thinking about my future and how I sometimes worry about my 'stuff' and my husband's 'stuff' and everything else in my life.

As I sat there, I felt a wave of what I can only call amnesia come over me. For an instant, I forgot my past and my future... I really kind of forgot who I was... (No, there were no mind altering substances involved) I saw my life laid out before me and felt the left and right side, representing the past and the future, slough off and drip down and away... And all that was left was me. Now. I can honestly say that for that moment, I didn't know who or where I was. I was high on now. I felt extremely joyful! Free and floating.

I have never experienced that before, but I was able to repeat it a few times before I reached the next town. I felt like I was in a hot air balloon and all the guy wires that were holding me down were popping one by one, allowing me to let go of the attachments I have to 'stuff' in my life and soar into the unknown.

Since I've been home, I've been drawing on this experience. Anytime I start feeling worry, regret, sorrow, anger, sadness, anxiety, panic or ANY of the so-called negative emotions, if I examine it closely, I find that it's because I'm thinking about or engrossed in the past or the future.

I'm not advocating complete and constant amnesia, as nothing would ever get done, but a few moments of this feeling a day have been wonderful for me.

I was just wondering in other ATS members have had this experience or other thoughts on the subject...

I'm happy for you, it is a great experience and hope you find many more in your future. I'm not aware of your philosophical or religious beliefs, but regardless I would suggest starting a meditative practice. This is essentially what you are already doing. In Zen it is called no mind, allowing things in the mind to rise and fall away experiencing only what is left without the illusion we see on a normal basis. This is somewhat of a rudimentary explanation, but I'm sure you understand my meaning. There are many forms and styles of meditation, so be free to experiment. The benefits to understanding the true nature of yourself, and to the ever changing illusion we call life is immeasurable. Namaste.

I have tried this before while driving but I never got as far as you have, I'm glad you shared this experience though because I know what you mean when you describe it but I have never really put much effort into inducing this experience on my own, I think I will give forgetting a shot.

BH, I have been applying this slowly to my life for awhile now.
Some things in my past NEEDED to be eliminated in order for me to simply continue to function normally.
Some things my mind buried on it's own, and others I buried deliberately.
I DO live for now..but live for the future as well.
Each day I leave a bit of the negative past behind, and focus on remembering happy memories.
That may seem extreme to some, but for me, it was something I had to do, and continue to do.
I was suffering from depression and always used past events in my life to justify why my present and future would always never be good or better.
BAD, BAD, BAD!!!!
It makes all the difference too when you have people in your life who support you fully, and lift you up when you start to feel down.Especially if they recognize the signs you put out there without even saying a word.
S&F BH...

Originally posted by AccessDenied
I was suffering from depression and always used past events in my life to justify why my present and future would always never be good or better.

This is my husband. Not only using the past to say, "Well, if I do this, this bad thing will happen", but to say, "What has happened in the past prevents me from moving into the future"... We can get all kinds of tangled up in thoughts of past and future.

As a side note, when I came home with all this woo-woo, I had a great talk with my husband and he is finding that living in the present is helping him with depression to a great degree. If you have forgotten that you're depressed, it's easy to move into joy.

XxZenTruthxX, I do meditate often and am familiar with most of the "new age" concepts, but I had just never experienced anything like this, even in my deepest meditations. It surprised me that I could actually "forget" the future. Pretty neat.

I wouldn't call this a new concept it's old really old in fact it might be the only thing that exists the "moment" and everything else like past and future is just used to define the "moment" and we like to think that those definitions are real and they are but they are but "definitions" of the present moment. And like XxZenTruthxX says its called no mind or the nothingness or mu or whatever. Its been used throwout history from people like the Buddha to the samurai's like musashi to the dude who wrote that book the art of war, to Greeks like Socrates or Socrates friend Timon to even Julius Caesar if my impressions of some things he was saying in his book/notes is right. We all do it in one form or another. Its were the saying "thinking clear" or "seeing clearly" originates from. Like it says in zen when you squash all the voices in the mind the path becomes clear, or something like that.

Or what this guy said...Spiritual seekers look for self-realization or enlightenment in the future. To be a seeker implies that you need the future. If this is what you believe, it becomes true for you: you will need time until you realize that you don't need time to be who you are.

- Eckhart Tolle



I to had these moments were things become clear...but like everything else it fades away...or more like changes then fades.

reply to post by galadofwarthethird


Thanks for the response.

Yes, I wouldn't call this new at all. It's just the first time I experienced "losing myself" in the moment. I mean, really forgetting who I was. It was pretty amazing.

By the way, since this experience and deciding to be present, I have found it easy and natural to return to this state in meditation. My life is a lot calmer and there's VERY little worrying, regret or negative feelings at all, really.

When I was a Kid my parents made me a special Present...they gave me a Tent for my birthday. So for days I went out living in the Present. I did present it to my friends. They were present one night with me in the tent when I presented presents. Those were happy days. But the present is also happy. When in the present, remembering the past, the remembering is laso in the present so there really is no such thing as living in the past or future is there?

OK figuratively speaking I guess being preoccupied with events long gone or worried about a future to come is kind of not being present. Waiting for better times is not being present. Saving ones love toward someone or something for another day is not being present. So I kind of get it. Yeah. But that tent, that was an amazing thing...when we get something new its almost like we have more presence then when living in a routine of what was expected...

I enjoyed writing down thoughts in your thread Benevolent Heretic and I hope this post finds you healthy and well and present forevermore

In all of time there is always only Now Here. Where ever you are it is always Now, and it is always Here. The Now Here at any given time is NowHere, and that space and time of NowHere is where we are at any given time. While the past can sometimes be a nostalgic place where genuinely sweet memories remind of us a happy time, all to often the past is a place for regret and memories that remind us of how difficult life can be. The past can be a dangerous place to go, and it is a place that is definitely somewhere other than NowHere. Going back to the past will not change the past, and even if that past brings up memories of nostalgia, it is indicative too often of the fact that we are not creating nostalgic moments NowHere.

The beauty of the NowHere is that it is the Present. It is a genuinely a gift to be in the Present, and each new moment is a moment Pre-Sent to us by us. We create our NowHere's and they are always Pre-Sent to us by us. It is better that these Pre-Sent moments are Presents we send to ourselves, and that our whole future is filled with Presents, Pre-Sent to us. When we understand that Now Here is a gift, and it is Pre-Sent to us by us as a genuine Present, then we can not help but be happy with the Now Here. We become giddy with anticipation for the next Now Here looking forward to our Pre-Sent Now Here's as if each moment is either Christmas or, at the very least, Christmas Eve.

What wonderful Presents will tomorrow bring, or the very next moment bring? With such happy giddiness how can anything other than wonder and beauty be a part of our future? No matter how trying life may get, if we can understand the beauty of Now Here, and that each passing moment is gone and no longer any burden, and that each coming moment is yet another opportunity for the future we truly desire, then Now Here becomes that special place in space in time where we begin to focus on creating future Presents. The more Presents we send to ourselves the more enjoyable each Now Here becomes, and the more we enjoy each Now Here, the more likely we send ourselves even more Presents in the future. This is the beauty of Now Here, NowHere, and this is the beauty of the Present, Pre-sent to us as a gift, a Present, NowHere.

reply to post by Benevolent Heretic

For an instant, I forgot my past and my future... I really kind of forgot who I was...

I know what you are saying, but remember, your past is a part of your persona, and helps to define who you are now, in the present. What I did with all that baggage is file it away in a hidden fine, back in the recesses of my mind. Oh, I can still open the file, and look at it again, but I am not forced to. It's about forming new brain synapses, new highways of thought process that bypass that old stuff. I have yet to meet a woman who does not have a little man baggage. Some carry it like a big suitcase, too. I can relate to this, because I once carried some woman baggage.

Originally posted by autowrench
I know what you are saying, but remember, your past is a part of your persona, and helps to define who you are now, in the present.

Yes, whether it's pleasant or unpleasant, my past helps define who I am. Many things come from the past:

Anger
Love
Fear
Compassion... So, I'm not advocating denying the past or getting rid of it altogether, I just don't let negative experiences of the past dictate how I respond to today. I don't say, "Well, last time I tried to help someone, I got snubbed." Instead, I say, "I want to help that person." And so I do. For today.

When I say I 'forgot my past', it was only for an instant. My memory is still intact. I just do my best to experience each new day free from the encumbrances of the past and concerns of the future.

There is no such thing as present, future, past. If you consider those things to exist, then think about the fact you never live the present. Once you think about something, it comes from the future, once it happens it is past. So, you run behind the future and in front of the past without ever being able to live the present.

That is like that and in reality all happens at same time and you move trough it and live it at a certain moment.

It is the will of Allah in some way since AL means in jewish ALL or GOD and LA means NOTHING or IS NOT.

So, ALL is NOTHING and NOTHING is ALL. Inch Allah, in the view of Allah.
The old scriptures relate this quiet good and if they write that it is the ALPHA and the OMEGA means it's at the end as at the beginning, on top as on bottom, above as below and inside as outside.

All is just energy that manifests in a certain way of perception due to the fact that different parts of the whole swing at different frequencies. It is an Illusion only and it never dies or disappears, it just changes aspect and disappears from view and comes back under another another perception again.

So, why be worried about the future and relate this future to the past.
All is written, follows the agenda and we can not change anything to it.

So, live your life with ease, let the horses think since they have bigger heads and enjoy the present moment, the HERE and NOW.

This is interesting. I have been a dabbler in meditation for a couple years now and have had some experiences like this. Thing is I think the state you mentioned, where you have an amnesiac feeling, might actually not hinder your everyday functioning. You should actually try it out while doing some normal work and then see if you can maintain an outwardly normal life while being in such a mindstate. The way I see it, if alcoholics can be drunk all the time, **** smokers can be high all the time, etc. why can't these mindstates gained though meditation become our normal usual mindstates while we go about our daily business?

I'm pretty sure Eckhart Tolle for example said that basically he never has normal thoughts anymore, and that only when he's dealing with a problem that requires "the practical mind" does he ever think. I'd like to whittle my thinking down to this level. Using my subconscious for almost everything and only using my practical mind for tasks that are better solved in words or some other format that must be thought through.

reply to post by Merle8


Interesting you should mention that. I have found myself in this state of mind often, where I am not thinking at all, but just being. It's like I catch myself 'wondering' and then I say, "I'm OK. I'm here." Like I lose touch with myself and then grab a line to ground me.

It's becoming a habit. In most of my day to day activities, a lot of thinking isn't necessary (how sad is that?). When it's necessary to plan for the future (even dinner) or remember something, I can call on my brain, but otherwise, it's just kind of snoozing as I go about my day. There's a lot of spontaneous behavior (and LOTS of laughter) in this house now.

The inhibitions that I was carrying around, that I used to tell me the proper way to behave, are all but gone. I find myself wondering, "Am I forgetting something? Is there something I'm supposed to be doing or taking care of"? But it seems that my life is working just fine without the constant scrutiny of that part of my brain that 'checks' everything I do for appropriateness.

It's really very freeing. When I think about it, it seems like I might "forget" something important, so I have to stay in touch, but I haven't yet. Or if I have, it must not have been that important...

reply to post by Benevolent Heretic


yeah - i think of it as 'detachment' for a lack of a better term.
you will get more proficient at it, without losing the part of you that is a result of the GOOD times.
that part of you is the real you.
the worries and fears and anxieties are NOT you.

you are joy, as you know!

it will become more like a habit or maybe even just a way to live.
but now that you've experienced it, i doubt that you'll ever go back to the other way even by lack of diligence, so to speak. i don't think it is natural and therefore doesn't persist itself.
you have to be diligent in meditation but not in just living for the moment!
joy comes far more naturally than any negative emotion, certainly.

just my opinion.
well, from personal experience, that is.

i'm glad for you and your husband.

depression, as i learned it in nursing school psychology, is "anger turned inward" - which i later experienced on a one-time situational basis, in my own life, and i realized it was 100% true!

and that being the case, there is no amount or type of chemical therapy that can resolve it. anti-depressants cannot work because the chemical imbalance in the brain does not cause the depression - it just shows that it is there, a symptom or indication.

the very nature of being mad at one's self precludes the discovery of the anger, for most people. it's not easy to be mad or disappointed with one's self - what can you do?

but if you forget why you are mad or disappointed, *poof*.
there's no need to do anything about it, anymore, anyway!

reply to post by Jean Paul Zodeaux


Now I'm feeling wrapped in pre-sent presents and feeling quite claustrophobic.

Edit to add: Have you been taking your corexit supplements or did you finally get that hot and cold running cough syrup tap installed?

[edit on 7/29/2010 by EnlightenUp]