posted on Jul, 5 2010 @ 02:22 PM
So here's the problem, and I would greatly respect feedback, be it welcoming or blunt. I am a 22 year old male, a college graduate with everything
going for me right now. I have been a Proud Christian follower for several years now and I have never thought of straining from my faith until now. A
couple years ago I was introduced to the most wonderful person on the face of this earth (only one mans opinion I know), and our friendship grew into
a strong love. During that time I was diagnosed with manic depression. It hit me like a truck and literally destroyed the relationships I had worked
so hard for in my life. The one person I cared about most was hurt so much but trusted me to seek help.
Long story short, help was working and I foolishly thought I didnt need help anymore (first mistake of anyone recoving from any affliction), and just
resently everything came crashing down, and I again diagnosed with clinical bipolar disorder. I look back now and wonder why? Why would a God so
loving and caring give me someone so lovely only to push her away and make her be disgusted with the person a have become. Yes it might be a mental
sickness that many people on this planet deal with, but it is no excuse for the pain that has been inflicted, which I think to be true. I have been
turning to God more than ever before in my life and I receive nothing. I am no close minded "religous" freak as some may believe most Christians to
be. I accept all walks of life and do not believe my faith in a being to be better than anyone elses. I also understands the limitations of God's
powers on mankind and the endless possibilities of Satan's ever extending hand.
I am seriously considering to sell my soul to Lucifer, the great Morningstar, the Prince of Lies. I would sell it for understanding and forgiveness of
my lovely girl in which I want to spend the rest of my life with happily, eternity be damned.... literally. Lemme know what you think.