My Cat Bentley has passed away

I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. My parents had a cat and he too was around for a little over 14yrs. These four legged critters dogs too have a knack of getting into your heart and become members of the family. They still miss him and I miss not seeing him around.

I lost a cat too about five years ago. I got her from an animal shelter when I was a teenager. They told us she was found in a snowstorm at around 7-8 months old with a litter of kittens. When we took her to get declawed, the vet found that she had a damaged knuckle which had to be completely removed and that she was FIV positive. She lived a little over ten years and she died on my 25th birthday. I found her dead with the kind of look on her face like she didn't want to go and had fought it to the end. It broke my heart. She had been having trouble breathing for a couple months leading up to that, but there was nothing that could be done and I kinda knew her time was coming. I imagine she died of a heart attack or heart failure too.

At the end of November of last year, I got a four month old kitten for free from someone that used to be a friend and she reminds me a lot of my old cat in personality. I didn't get her declawed and aside from rabies and distemper, I will not be exposing her to vaccinations. I'm happy I decided to take this kitten. I'll never forget my old one (her name was Gotcha, new one is named Fasha), so just give it time. I've been around pets my whole life, so I couldn't stand not having one around anymore and I'll bet that time will come for you too. A new cat could never take the place of a deceased one, but it would create it's own place in your heart and fill you up all the same.

I'm sorry for you.

14 years... that is a long time. Keep your cat and these emotions separate.
Don't fill up the gap with another cat, because it will always be the other cat.

It's just hard to loose a loved one, even if it's just a cat.

OP, my heart goes out to you. I have a very special relationship with my feline. She came close to death once and it was not pleasant.
She has been with me through the roughest parts of my life and I know it will be heart-breaking when I live on after she passes.

Hang in there!

Hayden,
I'm in the veterinary field, have had, loved and lost many pets. My fiancee passed away in March and I can onl tell you that time will help you. My last dog was only 10 when he passed and I had to make that decision. I know where you are coming from and trust me at some point you will be ready for a new fur ball. It WILL NOT be a replacement but you may see some of the same qualities in your new friend.

I wish you all my best.

R

reply to post by Kratos1220


My Cat also had breathing trouble a couple of weeks before he died, i used to cuddle him and he relaxed and fell asleep, his purring was so loud and it looked like he was smiling at me, he used to wink at me alswell

Been there myself and will be there again. People who havn't simply won't get it. But we do. It hurts. More than it should even.

May I suggest you post a tribute to Bentley on:

Youns.com

and

www.mogdoggy.com...

It's a small gesture but will memorialize Bentley. Made us feel a little better. And we go back there to visit every now and then.

Just know where the source of your sadness is. Self-pity is natural at times like these but it will pass, as will your pain.
Time does heal all wounds.
Very sorry to hear of your loss.

Time is really all that will help...but getting another pet can help somewhat...as long as you don't look for a replacement, just another companion.

My two cats are both up there in years (both are about 15) (and a couple of years ago, we lost a 17 yr old cat)...so won't be too much longer until I lose them.

Occasionally, I've had to have pets over the years, put to sleep as they were in pain for medical issues, so much nicer to see them go naturally..

reply to post by Haydn_17


R.I.P. Bentley...

How can you get over it? Easy, I have 4 cats. What color and gender do you prefer and how do we work out shipping?!?!??

Fourteen years is an exceptionally long time to have a cat.
After such a tragic loss, only two kittens can heal your hurt now. After watching them fight and chase each other all over the place, you'll be over it in no time and soon the day will come when you can laugh at things Bentley did.

Originally posted by Haydn_17
My 14 year old cat, my first and last pet has died of heart failure. He was my best friend, nothing can replace him, he had a great and unique attitude, almost human. Please, how can i get over it, what helped you. RiP Bentley xxxxxx

Nothing but time will help you get over it, I know the feeling

When the time is right I totally recommend getting a another cat, not to replace him, but because the cat race are just so great!

You must be so heartbroken - time will heal. You have to go thru the grieving process - it is only normal. When you feel the time is right - get another kitty and you will find a new friend for many years to come. May you find peace and good memories!

You can take comfort in knowing that all the time your cat was with you he was loved and well looked after.

You gave him a good life and, sadly, not all pets are treated so well. Bentley was lucky to spend his life with you.

You saw him safely through life and over to the other side.

I am sure you will know when another little one needs you. You'll know exactly when to start looking.

Let yourself grieve - it will take as long as it takes. One day, you'll remember him and smile and it will dawn on you that you can think of him happily again.

reply to post by Haydn_17


it is an unusual relationship we humanzees can have with our "pets". i don't really care for that term "pets" too much, though. it seems to me they are much more like our friends and family. we don't own them, and they are not really our property. they can sense our moods, and react accordingly, often showing that they can feel for us. they can warn us of possible dangers, if we can listen to them.

it can be a unique relationship.

the first "pet" i cried over was a guinea pig. it was more than 30+ years ago. It wasn't really my pet, though. It was a classroom pet, and my third grade teacher Mrs. Yates gave her to my family to take care of over the summer. during that summer it had passed away, and i was under the impression i had failed more than just the guinea pig.

nearly two years ago i was going through alot in my life. i had been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Dissorder associated with Traumatic Brain Injury due to being too close to some stuff that went boom. i was a firefighter in the united states air force, and after 11 years, i just could not do it any more. i was depressed and worried about my future.

i was living outside Nellis AFB in Henderson Nevada with my parents and my 90 year old grandmother. my parents were on a cruise and i was "grannysitting" while they were away, and i was waiting to get medically retired from the usaf.

it was around noon, and i was going out to the front porch to smoke a cig. the temperature outside was 112 degrees. when i opened the solid front door, there was a small boston/french terrier mix dog sitting and shaking and panting. he was shaking because the fireworks the neighborhood children were lighting off.

i opened the screen door, and he ran into the house (he'd never been in before) through the living room, through the kitchen, through the dining room, down the hall, and into my grandmothers room. she was sitting in her chair playing crossword puzzles, and i was following behind him.

he entered her room, and just plopped down on her feet like he belonged there, still panting and still shaking. seemed like a nice enough dog. i got him some water, and went outside and had my smoke.

then i went around to a few neighbor houses to see if anyone knew who he belonged to, but to no avail.

he had his animal shelter tags and registry number, but they were closed due to the national holiday (july fourth).

he never barked, but he obviously didn't like the fireworks.

the next day we found out who he belonged to about 16 houses away down another street.

a few days later my parents returned from their trip. My grandmother, who suffers from some memory problems and rarely remembers too many details, but she is in excellent health for her age, kept asking about where the dog went to.

my grandmother can't tell you what she had for a meal five minutes ago, but she remembered that dog for a week and kept asking about it almost every hour.

so, me and my mother late on a Friday evening went to the dog owners' house to see if we could just "borrow" or babysit the dog for them ever.

the owner said she had picked up the dog from the pound about a month ago, and that her big black lab had to get stitches in his face because this little dog and it got into a fight.

She told us she had just given him a bath and that she was taking him back to the pound the next morning. he obvously did not like other dogs too much, little dog syndrome some say.

thing is.... due to all the foreclosures at the time, the pound was overwhelmed, and any anti-social dogs were being put down after 3 days in the pound.

we took him home.

grandma said "Guido" was a stupid name and she said his name is "Fido", not "Guido".

F.I.D.O. = Found Independence Day, Oh.

he makes a good friend, and definatley has personality, and after some work has a better relationship with other dogs these days.
he has helped me alot. he listens well, and doesn't interupt me, and talks back in his own way.

he had a rough puppyhood, and that is apparent. his tail is broken in a few places, like another dog chomped down on it. he spent god knows how long in the pound, and had some emotional problems. he was skittish and scared and shook alot, but not any more unless it thunders outside.

now he is here snoring next to me on the couch as i type these words.

funniest thing is, i have rarely heard him bark when he is awake.
he barks more when he is sleeping and dreaming.
and when he is sleeping with me in my bed sometimes he wakes me up with his loud dreams.

last summer when we moved back to illinois, me and my brother live on the edge of town, sorta. woods and wildlife around us.

3 acres of land, he took off chasing a mother deer and her three fawns.
it was hillarious to watch. at one point i couldn't tell who was chasing who.

three deers and a dog, evenly spaced and running around in a big circle, the mother off to the side looking at them, and looking over at me. it was like they were playing, no one kicking Fido, and Fido not biting any of them.

i think it helps to share stories we remember about our pets, to honor them and recognize they too have their own stories. i think you may find some level of relief from your loss if you were to share some stories and how your cat made you feel.

here is a little poem for you and your friend:

forgive us if it is your soul we attempt to coax
but, we are pretty sure death is just a hoax

and we remember his purrs and how he loved us so gently
we honor our long lost friend, our companion named Bentley


pleasentries,
ET


[edit on 29-6-2010 by Esoteric Teacher]

Oh So sorry for your loss, I really know how this feels,

HUGS to you ok xxx and if you need an ear please know that im here for you,

Originally posted by Haydn_17
My 14 year old cat, my first and last pet has died of heart failure. He was my best friend, nothing can replace him, he had a great and unique attitude, almost human. Please, how can i get over it, what helped you. RiP Bentley xxxxxx

Am so sorry for your loss... Yes RIP, Bently...

It will take time for things to be a bit easier. I, too, had a dog and cat for 14 years and lost them. I love and still miss them dearly. They both died within months.

Got rid of EVERY pet item in the house, vowing to never have another animal... It hurts...

Approx., one year later, I was reading a county paper and came across an article with pets for adoption from the local animal shelter. The photo of this cat reminded me of my other... I felt something for this cat and wanted to adopt but was torn and didn't want to start all over with pet supplies, ie litter box, etc. plus I didn't want to be hurt again if I were to lose another pet. I talked myself out of it, but still one week or so later, I found myself down at the shelter adopting him... and since have another rescue.

How much love and joy, they DO briNG!

One pet can never replace another... But there's always room for loving another... and vice versa :-)

You'll get through this...I promise. Again, I am so very sorry for your loss. All we can do is hang on to/treasure those beautiful moments we've been allowed.
May you find comfort ...

RIP Bently

I feel your pain, my friend. I too know what it is like to lose a furry friend after a life-time of companionship and love. The only advice I can give is this: Cherish the memory of Bentley in your heart and thank God for giving you the chance to have such an awesome cat in your life. It is natural to grieve, so let yourself do that; do not try to get over it too soon...it will get easier with time but you will never forget him or the love that you shared; that is his parting gift to you.

[edit on 7/14/2010 by lightseeker]

[edit on 7/14/2010 by lightseeker]