A random writing of mine (Please Read and give feedback)

You and your friend are part of an anti-government militia that thinks the government is too powerful, so you plan scenarios of terrorist attacks at your house (because its bigger than your friends, so there are more places to put maps of fallout, bio-terrorism attacks, etc) and one night you had this huge meeting because you thought the government was planing a false-flag attack, to take out major cities and reform a new government, You highlight areas on your maps. The next morning you turn on the news, and DHS has raised the NTA (National Threat Advisory) to red (or severe). You look out your window and see a S.W.A.T. Team standing there with fully automatic M4s and two FBI agents, along with a huge team of US Marshals. You grab as many maps as you can (the one from last nights meeting) and you get out of there using your trap door, which has an underground tunnel system. You try to go and get your friend, but the JTTF already got to him, and when you get to his house you see him being loaded into a van. So now your on your own, you MUST get out of the city or face death from the attack, but there are military search points everywhere, so you decide to get your stuff, and abandon your car. You do that, and run through the Forrest, once your out, you know some friends out side of the city, so you go to them. They give you a ride to a rural area outside of the city, about 90 miles away, where you will be safe from attack. Then, the next day, you are standing outside and hear something go off, You look to the south-east, and where your home town should be is a mushroom cloud. Although you expect it, you fall to your knees because of the emotional overload, all your friends, everything you've ever loved, is gone, in a blink of an eye. Whenever you regain consciousness, you get up from the ground, and get on your ham radio, and find out that almost all major cities are gone, and even other countries have been attacked. Then you go over too your friends, and tell them, they say to keep it a secret. So you make a hideout in your basement, and start making everything EMP Proof. You venture out to other cities and help people. One night, the US sends nuclear warheads out to N.K. and China, from various military bases. A few weeks later, power and order is restored, you get an automated phone call from DHS telling you they are coming and sending military support. Military arrives, and the city is under martial law. Within a year, there is a new government formed. Three new governments, one with the south east , One with the majority of the eastern seaboard, and one with the mid-west, south-west, and what remains of the western states. There are a few states that are still under there own government (TX,NY,AZ). The government in the eastern seaboard and the south east decide to combine, because they are trying to remain with the same fundamental rights as the old US government (Constitution Democracy). The other government, which still has more power, is under a restructured constitution, which removes rights to bare arms, and other fundamental rights.

Yeah, this is VERY much like Jericho and Operation BlackJack (I know) but, this is one of the first drafts, the further along I get, It will be more unique.

I want your feedback, if its good or bad. Suggestions, etc.

:bash:

J/K

It's pretty good. It is kinda hard on the eyes due to its formatting. Try separating it into paragraphs. Also, when you mention he goes home, is that the home that was blown to smithereens, or a new home?

I'd like to see more of what you got.

reply to post by loveguy


It'd have to be his new home . I'll change it and write more. Whenever I do, I'll post it in this thread.