I was wondering recently about the world's religions. There are so many varied faiths and traditions out there that I began to wonder as to how they
originated. many are manmade, some say that they are the word of God. Others are based on the cycles of the year.
If you could create a religion, what would it be ?
Followers of Pixianity
attempt to emulate the actions of the pixies by bringing laughter and happiness to as many as possible. In doing this,
they receive Pisky's blessings. Pixianity states that every life is sacred, whether it be a bird, a dog or a human being. Each has a soul and can
experience emotions. Causing pain for the sake of it is anathema. Those who do so are subject to the pixies' revenge.
The pixie's revenge is always performed in a balanced manner. Pixy-leading someone into a slimy pond which smells of poo is a perfectly good way to
deal with those with negative qualities. However, hacking off the genitals of the boss for firing you is not an acceptable way of dealing with the
Followers of Pixianity respect all religions. We may not agree with some of the more negative traditions, but we will respect people's right to
worship as they wish.
Pixianity sits best with followers of the Celtic/Pictish pantheon, the Norse trickster god Loki, The Ancient Egyptian 'Pixy God' Bes, and those
followers of the Native American tradition who have Coyote as their totem.
The symbol of Pixianity is a pixy sitting on a toadstool.
Pixianity has no holy book similar to the Torah, Bible or Koran, However the Pixy Folk
are acceptable substitutes
April 1 - April Fool's day:
Followers of Pixianity wander around taking the piss and performing practical jokes.
25 June - Pisky's birthday:
Followers celebrate with pints of Cornish Scrumpy, Guinness and Cornish pasties
31 October - Halloween:
Followers dress as spooks and scare the arse out of the general public. Tony Blair is burned in effigy while pixies
dance and feast on Cornish Scrumpy and Pixy Stix.
- Pixians give presents to their loved ones and invite them to drink mulled Cornish cider and consume the standard fare of Pixy
Stix and Cornish pasties.
Note: During these holidays, remember to leave offerings to the pixies (preferably of Cider, Cornish pasties and pixy stix) or risk the wrath of
Followers of Pixianity believe that at the end of their current incarnation they will visit the astral version of Pixyland (What the Wiccans call
'The Summerland'). Once there they will frolic and caper, dance and drink with the pixies until it is time to reincarnate. Some more advanced souls
will actually become
pixies and will be given the choice to either stay in Pixyland or reincarnate in order to spread the Pixies' message to
From the ATS scriptures :
And the Pisky said 'I shall place dreamlandmafia at my left hand (since KayEm and the pixy padawan are at my right). And dreamlandmafia shall be
sent out to convert the heathens and pixy-lead the sheep.
And the Pisky spoke forth and did say that henceforth his apostles would be called followers of Pixianity. And he did take his left hand and with it
did raise up a glass of beer. And he did drink and saw that it was good