reply to post by zbeliever
First off, I didn't lose custody of my children, I'm a full time parent, thank you. Also, just because a child wants to live with one parent or
another, doesn't mean anything in the court's eyes. Sometimes it may influence a decision a little, once the kid is a teenager, but it does not mean
that the child gets to choose.
The courts frown on letting/making the child choose a parent and since they are minors, their decision has little, if any weight with the courts.
Also, no matter what a man says, the child will almost always go with the mother, irregardless of what the father says or wants. It really isn't up
to him. As long as the mother isn't video-taped blowing crack-smoke down a child's throat, she isn't going to lose custody, period. If the mother
wants to press the issue and be a # about it, she can completely void the father out of any visitation, irregardless of a court order.
A judge is highly unlikely to punish a "single-mother" through a damaging contempt charge. It's just bad politics and that's what it's about for
almost all judges, if not all and regardless of whether the judge is appointed or elected.
As far as the situation getting bad enough for a parent to kidnap the child, it's all relative. I happen to personally think that a mother alienating
a child as being bad enough. If she is willing to do that, then she obviously isn't mentally or emotionally ready to raise that child and the child
could be in danger. While a mother is allowed to alienate a child from the father, the father has no means to do so, legally, In a situation such as
this, it is beneficial to remove the child from the parent doing so and since a father has no legal ability to do such a thing, he is left with only
Many men will protect their children no matter what and I can only commend them for it. You can't just say, "well the government is forcing my child
to remain in a dangerous situation and their is nothing I can do". You do what you have to. Again, there is often no other recourse for men in that
situation, while women have many options, for the most part.
reply to post by toolstarr
As far as your situation, I'm sorry to hear that. However legally, that mother didn't do anything wrong. If there was no court order dictating
visitation for the father, she is not kidnapping the child in the eyes of the law. This actually happens allot.
However, it would be illegal kidnapping for a father to do the same. Really, the only thing a father can do in a situation like that, is try to find
the mother and order to her court in an effort to win visitation. However, this will pretty much mean that the father will have to pick up and move to
wherever the mother went. This too happens quite often.
With that being said, it is rare that a mother will pick up and leave, never to be heard from again. Usually, the mother will move someplace and
quietly file paperwork for child-support, claiming the father can't be located. This gives the mother time to be alone and build an offensive
strategy while allowing her to fight for child-support since the day that she filed the paperwork. In other words, she will be able to claim child
support for the entire time that she was in "hiding". The guy will eventually be served with court orders, ordering him to pay a large sum of money
in back child support, after his child has been technically, though legally, kidnapped.
Generally speaking, when a mother moves away and doesn't file for child support or anything, it means that she is truly trying to hide from the
father, possibly because she is frightened of him for some reason. I'm certainly not suggesting this to be the case with your step-dad but generally