posted on Jun, 8 2004 @ 11:01 AM
Why is it that when adults have multiple personalities it's
schizophrenia, but when a child has imaginary friends it's cute?
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If you swallow a burp does it turn into a fart?
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Can you put a gay man in a straight jacket? -
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Do they have burglar alarms at Christian bookstores?
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Why do bullies always ask "what?s your problem" when they're obviously
not going to solve it?
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Do stairs go up or down?
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When people say, "I'm so tired it's not even funny" or "my head hurts so
much it's not even funny", why would it even be funny in the first
place?
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Why is there a top line on lined paper if we never use it?
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Do coffins have lifetime guarantees?
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Why do the numbers on phones go down while the numbers on calculators go
up?
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If Hooters were to become a door-to-door service would they have to
change
their name to Knockers?
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If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?
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Are children who act in rated 'R' movies allowed to see them?
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Can you make a candle out of your earwax?
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When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
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Aren't the 'good things that come to those who wait' just the leftovers
from the people that got there first?
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If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
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Can a fire truck park in the fire lane?
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Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?
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"Cute as a button" Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are
buttons cute?
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Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time? -
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Are marbles made of marble?
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Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup? -
If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do
you get you money back? (Granted you lived)
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Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
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Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze
these dangly things here and drink what comes out"? -
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Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken over there ... I'm
gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt"?
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Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
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If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? -
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
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Can you get cornered in a round room?
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Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
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Why don't the hairs on your arms get split ends?
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If an atheist has to go to court, do they make him swear on the Bible?
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Why is it illegal to park in a handicapped parking space but its ok to
use a handicapped toilet?
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In that song, she'll be coming around the mountain, who is she?
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How come we say 'It's colder than hell outside' when isn't it
realistically always colder than hell since hell is supposed to be fire
and brimstone?
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Why is it that if something says, "do not eat" on the packaging it
becomes extra tempting to eat?
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Why are people so scared of mice, yet we all love Mickey Mouse?
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Wouldn't it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like
chocolate?
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Why are the commercials for cable companies on cable but not on regular
television? Don't they want the people without cable to buy the cable?
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"Have you ever noticed that if you rearranged the letters in mother in
law, they come out to Woman Hitler?"
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Isn't it funny how the word 'politics' is made up of the words 'poli'
meaning 'many' in Latin, and 'tics' as in 'bloodsucking creatures'? -
Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is
clear??
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Why is it that when you get out of a swimming pool, your urine is hotter
when you use the restroom?
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Can mute people burp?
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What happens if you put this side up face down while popping microwave
popcorn?
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Why is chopsticks one of the easiest songs to play on the piano, but the
hardest thing to eat with?
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How come you play at a recital, but recite at a play? 0 If a fork were
made of gold would it still be considered silverware?
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If heat rises, then shouldn't hell be cold? -
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Why is there that little space inside strawberries, as if it was meant
for a pit, and then the seeds are on the outside? -
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Why isn't chocolate considered a vegetable, if chocolate comes from
cocoa beans, and all beans are a vegetable?
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Do they have girl's bathrooms in gay bars?
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Why is toilet bowl cleaning liquid only blue?
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Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us
we are put into the loony bin?
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Why do you go "back and forth" to town if you really must go forth
before you go back?
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Why does shaped macaroni taste better than the normal kind?
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Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?
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Why can't you get a tan on your palms?
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If you're sick for one week and on one of those days they had to cancel
school because of snow, do you have to make up that day in June?
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Why do dogs sniff other dog's bottoms to say hello, why don't they just
bark in their face or something?
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Why do companies offer you "free gifts?" Since when has a gift NOT been
free?
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If something "goes without saying," why do people still say it? You know
the expression, "Don't quit your day job?" Well what do you say to
people that work nights?