posted on May, 2 2010 @ 10:14 PM
OOH! First thread nerves lol!
Last year I got put on to a new way of thinking by a member of ATS. I began meditating for the first time, learning about vibrations, chakras,
energies, higher light magic and all that good stuff. I always in the past tended to stay away from all the organised religion but at the same time I
had a burning desire to believe in something more than this mortal life so this non-religious spirituality suited me down to the ground.
All was going well until I began to awaken, a calm and inner knowing came over me at the start, I was reaching levels of love I hadn't experienced
My brain un-fuzzed so to speak and found I could think much more clearly and perceptively, it was like I had been living my life at 60%.....all indeed
was going well......
After months of seemingly becoming more awakened, I'm at a point now where its becoming a daily battle to keep myself on an even keel spiritually.
Since my inner light became switched on strange things have started to happen to me (Some are off-topic so I'll keep them for another thread!) I'm
at a point where this awakening has attracted things like paranormal events, strange and disturbing thoughts, Feelings of being watched by some sort
of entity, a mocking outlook on the world and a lack of empathy with my fellow man.
To me at this point it seems that you have to pick a side (light or dark) then you are just used as a tool for that side, being thankful for the
knowlege but paying for it though your acts in this world. I don't see the point in taking part and having to become nothing more than a instrument
for which ever side you pick. I'm contemplating giving up and becoming neutral in this unseen game, ignorance is bliss they say!
I don't know if this is connected but recently I've had this tingling sensation on top of my head right over the crown chakra, it feels like energy
or something. Does anyone know what this could be?
Thanks for reading, any advice would be much appreciated because with all the downsides I've been experiencing over the past few months I'm
struggling to see the ultimate goal of it all.