Originally posted by unworldly
I absolutely loathe human beings, yes I know that is horrible but there just seems to be no limit to human stupidity and ignorance and I just honestly
cannot stand people.
And yet here you are, asking ATS members for help
It seems to me that your opinion of other people isn't quite as low as you think it is.
I'm a bit of a misanthrope, looking at people in general, but I'm rarely misanthropic when I'm dealing with individual human beings - if you see
what I mean.
If you really loathe people it's hardly surprising if they pick up on that and can't find a way to be close to you, even those who might be prepared
to give you a chance.
Did you ever hear that expression 'A smile works wonders' ? That's easy to dismiss when you're a miserable people-hating so-and-so, isn't it?
And yet it can help.
If you're shy and socially awkward, try to bear in mind that your awkwardness makes other people feel uncomfortable. They maybe can't work out what
is is about them, personally, that makes you find them difficult to deal with.
Just try to relax your manner a little and smile when you approach people. Of course, some of them will look at you as if they think you're mad, but
that's their problem. Other people, besides you, have difficulties in their lives and may not feel like smiling that day. But many more will be
relieved to deal with a courteous, approachable person in an increasingly hostile world.
Do you want to know who really taught me that lesson? My ex-employer's dog
The workplace could be extremely stressful and yet the dog would trot
into the office, tail wagging, smiling, expecting us to be pleased to see her. And I always was pleased and would stop what I was doing to give her a
cuddle. OK, I certainly don't want anyone cuddling me because I smiled at them, but you see what I'm getting at..... I hope
I'm not asking you not to be you. I'm suggesting that you see yourself as a work in progress. Have a look and see what it is about you that gets
you want you want in life and work with that. Have a look at what it is about you that prevents you from getting what you want in life and target
that as 'in need of improvement'. You are a lifetime's work and there's no harm in polishing yourself up a bit. Not only are those around you
more likely to appreciate you, but you'll find yourself a little bit easier to live with too.