New Study: Children Adopted by Homosexuals Are 'More Prone to Suicide'

reply to post by KevinHavoc

Are you suicidal?!?

How do you mean this?

(Second Line)

Edit:

Oh.... you mean because the topic is suicides from gay parents?

Yeah, I guess you could say that I USED to be suicidal...

I got over it though... I found a Calling, and it keeps me going.

-Edrick

[edit on 25-2-2010 by Edrick]

Homosexuals act like they don't have any control over themselves.

Same as murderers and rapists. It is never their fault. It is just the way Mother Earth sprouted them. Of course you can't blame a snake for biting you. It is after all a snake.

Free the rapists. Free the murders. Free the pyramid schemist Ponzi cons. Free them all to be themselves and spread their joy and love of aberrant behavior, and let's not judge them. Let's all marry our hedgerow. Pledge allegiance to the mulch pile, grass clippings and potato skins and all. It is all beautiful. I'm heading outside now to have sex with my mulch pile while wearing a mask.

Where is this model of needing two separate gender parents come from?


I'm a single father raising my two daughters on my own. Both excel in school and socially. Are often commented on for their manners and politeness and both love all things girly.


If you have a family around you who can help then what's the problem? Isn't that what family is for, isn't that what the church teaches about family?


You only have to look at the studies in to the Cinderella Effect to see how often remoulded separate gender families can be detrimental to children. I know that may be slightly ingenuous to the argument but I write it to show that no matter what model you have there will be problems.


For example look at the Bridgend Suicides in Wales and see if you can find a connection.

Originally posted by The Teller
Where is this model of needing two separate gender parents come from?


I'm a single father raising my two daughters on my own. Both excel in school and socially. Are often commented on for their manners and politeness and both love all things girly.


If you have a family around you who can help then what's the problem? Isn't that what family is for, isn't that what the church teaches about family?


You only have to look at the studies in to the Cinderella Effect to see how often remoulded separate gender families can be detrimental to children. I know that may be slightly ingenuous to the argument but I write it to show that no matter what model you have there will be problems.


For example look at the Bridgend Suicides in Wales and see if you can find a connection.

But your daughters don't have the pressure or social stigma attached to them because they have gay parents.

I don't know how old they are but I also presume they understand the reasonings behind your family life situation and have obviously adapted and adjusted to it very well.

You are correct in saying there will always be problems regardless of which family model is used but that logic can be applied to anything.

r u suprised, school must be hard for these people, its somthing that people pick up on, and will use it against the person making it hell for them.
people may get scared of the world will be like if it carried on.
its sad to see humans inflicting pain on humnans mentally or physcilly

Ya know what? Screw that.

I dont need to sit here and explain my life to you. I provide my daughtor with what she needs, and shes a happy little girl. Our family is, and will always be perfect for us. I dont care at this point what you do or dont agree with.
[edit on 2/25/2010 by KevinHavoc]

Ironic isn't it that someone a few posts up who proclaimed be be cool & calm while writing his post has lost his temper a few minutes later?

As far as I'm aware I haven't said anything offensive or been rude to you so why your taking the defensive "I don't need to explain myself to you" route is beyond me.

You was quite happy giving your views earlier in the thread to other but you won't answer a couple of my simple questions?

This is ATS, people here debate and question each other every day ,don't take it personally.

If I said something to offend you then I'll apologise but at the end of the day my opinion is my opinion and I'm entitled to it, just like you are with yours.

Originally posted by mike-harris
r u suprised, school must be hard for these people, its somthing that people pick up on, and will use it against the person making it hell for them.
people may get scared of the world will be like if it carried on.
its sad to see humans inflicting pain on humnans mentally or physcilly

A child with two homosexual parents would have been picked upon and teased to a point beyond crying at my old high school, there life would have literally been livng hell.

Before someone comes out with a clever replie about that being my choice of high school or my geographical area I can assure you the same thing would happen in any high school around the world.

reply to post by Death_Kron


No they don't have the stigma of coming from a gay family, whatever that stigma may be. But they have the stigma of coming from a single parent family. There have been a few issues with this which my daughter dealt with brilliantly, as you correctly say they have adjusted to the situation and we have dealt with that as a family so they are reassured as they grew up.

But how is that any different from being gay? The way I have raised my daughters and the way they deal with the situation would be the same no matter what the differences.

It's up to parents to teach their children how to deal with adversity and for parents to teach their children how to deal with differences in people.

Kids will be cruel no matter what differences you have, they know no different. What about kids who commit suicide because their parents enforce high pressure on school grades?

What about children who commit suicide because they are racially abused? Should we try to stop them being black?


Look at another and see yourself in them and you will never do harm to others.

reply to post by Death_Kron

Here are your points...

Secondly, no gay man can sit here and watch a film with his daughter while its her time of the month and her hormones are all over the place - of course they can do it physically but its a womanly thing, thats what mothers & daughters do together, do you know why?

I can watch the film later. Whom do you think told her about what products to buy etc? I know all about "time of month" and it is not a problem. If it was so terrible I would have sent her over to my mom's.

Because both the mother and the daughter experience it every month of every year so they can comfort each other as they each know what it feels like.

Can you go shopping and look at makeup with your daughter? Again, of course you can physically but its a woman thing, girls sit and look and discuss make up with their mums!

HAHA and I can do her makeup and show her what looks good on her. I take her shopping nearly every day.

What about when your daughter just wants some female family company?
My mother lives next door, but that hasn't happened yet. Her friends also visit. My female friend lives up the street. Lots of females for her to interact with.

I know you mention aunts but once again its not the same relationship that a mother has with her daughter.
My niece's relationship with her mother is bitter. Her mother is a crack head and a drunk. She was pawned off on me because she didn't want her. My brother had no place to go when they divorced so I got her.

Your a male obviously and I presume you had female friends at school/in your teens so you've surely seen a teenage girl have a loving relationship with her mother?
I had a loving relationship with both mother and father, know how it is. Most teenage girls I knew hated their mother until they became her.

I think your really mistaken if you think you can provide that bond.

The bond is very strong. We lie at opposite ends of the sofa with the tops of our heads touching and she tells me all her girl secrets. My brother isn't even half as close.

Let's go over it.
Diapers Check
Food Check
Shelter Check
Clothing Check
Make Up Check
Feminine Hygiene Check
Sympathetic Ear Check
Patience Check
Tutors Check
Strong Bond Check
College Savings Check
Custody Check

What else can her mother offer her that I cannot except perhaps a hit off a crack pipe and a shot of vodka?

reply to post by The Teller


I understand your point and your probably correct in general but its my personal opinion that I don't think homosexuals should be allowed to adopt children.

I just don't think two men or two women for that matter can provide what a man and woman can for a child.

Generally in homosexual relationships one partner is the more dominant while the other is the more submissive/passive. To a degree I can understand that adopted homosexual couples children understand this and treat one partner in a more feminine role as a child would to its mother in a heterosexual relationship.

I don't know, call me old-fashioned. Peronsally I believe a child needs its mother & father, you sound like your doing a good job in your personal situation however but call me bias I believe a child would be better off with one single parent rather than two homosexual parents.

reply to post by toochaos4u


Okay, I'll admit you've countered that argument very well and from what you say you obviously have a close and loving relationship with your daughter.

In your personal circumstances your right to say that your daugthers mother could provide her with nothing you couldn't, fair enough.

Let me ask you a question though, without sound disrespectful but you sound a feminine gay and seem to have adopted all the roles a female childs mother would.

With this in mind how do you in the same instance provide the roles a female childs father would in a heterosexual relationship?

Originally posted by Death_Kron
reply to post by The Teller

 

Generally in homosexual relationships one partner is the more dominant while the other is the more submissive/passive.

Same thing with hetero families. That is a big argument. Lots of times one parent will be dominant in comparison to the other

-Kyo

Originally posted by KyoZero

Originally posted by Death_Kron
reply to post by The Teller

 

Generally in homosexual relationships one partner is the more dominant while the other is the more submissive/passive.

Same thing with hetero families. That is a big argument. Lots of times one parent will be dominant in comparison to the other

-Kyo

Correct, But in a heterosexual relationship the women usually adopts the more submissive role as men are the stronger sex, we are expected to do the heavy lifting etc

In a homosexual relationship, from a gender based perspective, there is no submissive partner so usually one of them adopts that role i.e. a more feminine, submissive role.

However, I will concede that in heterosexual relationships one partner can be more dominant in terms such as financial status, intelligence or physical looks.

But I wasn't talking about those types of things, I was talking from a gender point of view.

How many homosexual relationships contain one partner who appears to be heterosexual and the other who acts like a member of the opposite sex?

[edit on 25/2/10 by Death_Kron]

Originally posted by Death_Kron
reply to post by toochaos4u

 

Okay, I'll admit you've countered that argument very well and from what you say you obviously have a close and loving relationship with your daughter.

In your personal circumstances your right to say that your daugthers mother could provide her with nothing you couldn't, fair enough.

Let me ask you a question though, without sound disrespectful but you sound a feminine gay and seem to have adopted all the roles a female childs mother would.

With this in mind how do you in the same instance provide the roles a female childs father would in a heterosexual relationship?

She is my niece, not my daughter although I do have custody. I am middle ground between masculine and feminine. I can do both roles whenever either is required. I can be tough if she is making bad grades,misbehaving, being rude.

On the other side of the coin my younger nephew also lives part time with us. I practice karate, football, and baseball with him. He's taken an interest in hunting so we pack up my dad and we go hunting. My partner takes him to Nascar races (both are fans). My brother handles most of the school work and such.

It all depends on the children's need. I try to take the best aspects of my own parents and leave behind their mistakes. I'm sure she'll find some fault in her upbringing just as I found in my parents.







[edit on 25/2/10 by toochaos4u]

reply to post by Death_Kron



You've lost me mow. You seem to be defeating your own argument inside your argument. Could you please clarify. Not being funny I just seem to see two points which defeat each other in those statements.



It's a nonsense that a child needs a male and female figure as parents, just the same as they need two parents at all.



Yes there is a lot to be said for the traditional model but as there is a 50% divorce rate that is no longer looking so traditional.

You said you would rather a child be in a single parent household than with two gay parents. So does that mean you don't oppose a single gay man adopting a child then?

reply to post by toochaos4u


Apologises for the mistake, I thought we was talking about your daughter.

Once again I'll admit you've answered the question well and fair play to you for making it work, you sound like a caring parent.

Couple of more things then; if you can adopt both roles between masculine and feminine then what role does your partner play with regards to your niece?

Also, how does your niece deal with your relationship to your partner?

Is she completely happy with it and at ease? Does she understand it?

I'm not trying to be personal just trying to look at the situation in a variety of ways in order to try and understand it better.

Originally posted by The Teller
reply to post by Death_Kron

 

You said you would rather a child be in a single parent household than with two gay parents. So does that mean you don't oppose a single gay man adopting a child then?

I find a single homosexual man adopting a child even stranger than a homosexual couple adopting one to be completely honest.

I don't think its correct for a homosexual couple to adopt a masculine role and the other partner a feminine role in the upbrining of a child, I think thats a mother and a father is for.

I'm trying to understand how the relationship works as per my conversation with toochaos4u.

reply to post by Death_Kron


It's simple really. If the parent(s), whether that is adoptive, gay, single, single gay, traditional, foster or family member with custody really love the child then it will work.


Being a parent is very hard work but the basics are simple. Instil pride, trust, tolerance and love into the child's life and it will all be okay. The only important thing is that we make sure we have safe and well looked after children and they become valuable members of society when they become adults.

Anything else is just piffle really.

[edit on 25-2-2010 by The Teller]

Originally posted by Death_Kron
reply to post by toochaos4u

 

Apologises for the mistake, I thought we was talking about your daughter.

Once again I'll admit you've answered the question well and fair play to you for making it work, you sound like a caring parent.

Couple of more things then; if you can adopt both roles between masculine and feminine then what role does your partner play with regards to your niece?

Also, how does your niece deal with your relationship to your partner?

Is she completely happy with it and at ease? Does she understand it?

I'm not trying to be personal just trying to look at the situation in a variety of ways in order to try and understand it better.

It is amazing you ask the questions instead of attacking.

We are very similar. That is what I looked for in a partner believe that or not. I was never attracted to very feminine or very masculine people. He treats her as I would treat her. It is good to have a set standard for children no?

My niece understands everything about gays. She asked and I sat her down and told her. No, it was not sexual talk.

Something like this...

Sometimes a man and woman fall in love and sometimes two men or women fall in love. We cannot control whom we fall in love with so it is who we are. Some people hate us for this and that is sad but, they will be this way until they find compassion in themselves.

She seems very happy. Last year she asked to be placed with us permanently at a hearing on her well being. Our home is comfortable.








[edit on 25/2/10 by toochaos4u]

reply to post by toochaos4u


It's nice to know you have a stable home life and that she is comfortable

I don't have a problem with homosexual people although I'll admit that I find it strange and I don't understand it however I have spoke to many homosexuals who have said the same thing!

Simple question, although it may sound like an obvious one; I take it that homosexual couples want to adopt a child and to treat it as their own just like heterosexual couples do.

Well biologically the only reason we are born is to reproduce and obvious two members of the same sex cannot do that so it wouldn't be unfair to assume they have no natural desire to have children.

In a heterosexual sense isn't the whole reason to have children to create life with the person you love and to carry on your bloodline.

Like I said gays cannot do this and even if they adopt a child as their own in will never physically or biologically be theirs (without sounding cruel)

So I suppose I'm asking why would they want to adopt ?

Edit: Just thought aswell, what would a gay couple think about their adoptive child's future sexuality?

Would they prefer their child to be homosexual like them or wouldn't they care?

I only ask because without sounding disrespectful but being heterosexual is considered the norm and many heterosexual couples would be shocked to discover their child was a homosexual.

[edit on 25/2/10 by Death_Kron]