I'm Tired - I'm Exhausted

reply to post by gwydionblack


It is as if I wrote that myself about my own trials and tribulations of what is happening all around us everyday - WELL DONE

reply to post by concernedcitizan


I'm not sure if that was meant to be a reply to my post but if it was I'd say the only thing I'd actually be an advocate of is further self awareness and understanding the world how you personally see it. I don't try to "wake people up" and I surely have no agenda to push my own ideas. I do however use my own personal view and understanding of the world to try and relate to other people's views and problems.

reply to post by gwydionblack


I notice how YOU said that.

This entire thread is full of people calling you immature.

So there's a difference.

You need to buck-up and realise we're not all out to get you, though you are an easy target, but that instead we all see the exact same thing:

a ranting, arrogant, self-important, immature kid

I've yet to read all the posts on this board, but I definitely hear where you're coming from. It gets frustrating trying to spread the truth to ignorant people. It's hard and I totally see each side of the battle.

On one hand, some of the things we try and explain seem completely far fetched and down right impossible to believe. So I understand why people might not take to the truth right away.
Unfortunately we've been "programmed" to believe in a false truth and some people find it harder than others to get past this. The longer you're in the dark, the harder it may be to come out of it.

On the other hand, there are things we can explain with complete proof that are much easier to comprehend, and we'll still get laughed at.
That's what the battle is all about! Trying to help people to come forth and be a part of the BIG PICTURE. We're all on this earth, we all want to be happy, and live /at least/ moderately. I'd be more than happy to live moderately and spread the wealth, than have rich and poor.

From what I've learned, through research, opinions of my peers, social networking, etc. and what just FEELS right to me, I feel like I know what to do, and I know what I'd like the end result to be, but I'm unsure how to get there, and how to help others get there! I know it's hard, but some souls have already chosen their paths, and we just have to let others form their own opinion. But once you've got the seed planted, once they've heard all these truths, there's no going back. It's embedded into their DNA, it's learned, and it cannot be unlearned. Just keep planting those seeds, and in their own time, their soul will lead them to the right path, whatever it may be.

It's hard to get shut down, once somebody laughs and mocks your beliefs, you don't want to try again. Don't let these people influence your truth! Just feel it, know it, and live it. That alone will help the collective consciousness. We all need to think alike and work together if we want to achieve our ultimate goal!

And that would be Freedom with a capital "F". (:

reply to post by Bobbox1980


I do sound co-dependent. However, it seems the co-dependency is linked to an individual, not to the entire world. That would be a situation that I would question.

Most of all, I don't believe in "mental disabilities" of these types. I believe the experiences we have make us who we are in life, and that there is no such thing as abnormal mental behavior (besides in the course of physical injury or problems).

Living in a word of mental health issues, co-dependency to me sounds like an excuse for somebody who cares too much compared to the rest of society. If that is their definition then count me in.

reply to post by Maarius


Tis life. I honestly have moved past the point of self indulgence to work towards change. I think others could do well by doing the same.


reply to post by djusdjus


Well I DO practice what I preach. Unlike most I maintain a 100% open mind, denying nothing until proven wrong. At the same time I accept no fact as my own unless properly researched, and even then I hold my regards and own opinions towards such.

I have become an activist. I revolt, I spread little known truths about politicians, I write my papers and congressmen. I post flyers, I hang flags, I do everything I can short of armed revolution. What do people say about me?

"You need to stop. You are going to get yourself into trouble."
"I'm worried about you."
"You can't be openly opposing the government like this."

Like hell I can't. I live my philosophy and thought it is easy to say that I don't, I assure you I do. I do everything within my power and then some to set the example.

reply to post by custom2006


I'm glad you could relate.


reply to post by seethelight


I've seen YOU and one other person call me out based upon my age. If that constitutes the thread being "full of people calling me immature" then I can understand why you don't understand the concept of freedom I propose.

You need to buck-up and realise we're not all out to get you, though you are an easy target, but that instead we all see the exact same thing: a ranting, arrogant, self-important, immature kid

You see, the difference between myself and you is that I speak for myself, about myself. However, you take it upon yourself to speak on behalf of everyone. The posts in this topic clearly prove you wrong but allow me to do so even more.

dis·crim·i·na·tion
-noun
treatment or consideration of, or making a distinction in favor of or against, a person or thing based on the group, class,or category to which that person or thing belongs rather than on individual merit: racial and religious intolerance and discrimination.

For example: race, religion, political affiliation, age, gender, beliefs







I honestly thought that through the sentiments of many that I would see the "light" so to speak and I would realize the fight was futile. Perhaps that once I realized how many people have failed in the same attempt, that I would hang up my hat and that would be that.

However, it is through the arrogant people who like to tell me what I can and can't do, and it is through those that would like to call me a self-proclaimed messiah, that I have instead found a rebirth.

You see, criticism, especially when used in ignorant ways and through attacks, such as ones I have received in this topic - only fuel my fire and my vision for why we need a change in this world. The world we live in now is ruled by popular opinion - the world we move towards will be ruled by the individual - those unafraid to stand up and exercise their opinions.

Those who truly cannot respect that calling for true Freedom - FOR EVERYONE - shows to me their lust for power and dominance over a group. If not then they would have no fear, for in a system of true Freedom, they would still be able to practice and harp on their beliefs, however, they would no longer be able to supply them onto the masses.


The old world was based on the mindset of a populace. Thus, civilizations, tribes, religions, and political parties were formed on the basis of common opinion. These groups used their combined influence to enforce their opinions onto others and frankly, that is where the world went wrong. I will change this world, first by setting an example.

I will go against the grain of what society deems acceptable. I will fight for the virtues of true Freedom, and I will let nothing stop me from that fight. I needed a pick me up but now I got it. I am reassured now that my mission is more important than ever it has been and it shall continue until my dying day.

know that for every person who listens to you, and for every person that turns you away, that we are slowly drawing a CLEAR separation between "us"...and "them".

when they degrade you or slander you for trying to help them, just brush it off and shovel 'em to the "them" pile. "they" dont want to be saved.

in the end when everybodies devided up both sides can then progress without the frustration or disapointment or feeling that they "didnt save everybody".

but can at least feel content in saving everybody who wanted to be saved.



(note that this goes for any arguement with 2 opposing *mixed* forces. i only use the word "saved" to emphisize perspective)

I understand where you are comming from and when i get Frustrated I just try and remember the "The Allegory of the Cave" by Plato. If you haven't read it please check it out here is the link. I hope you have a great day. Remember most people don't understand...



webspace.ship.edu...

There is an old saying that says, "You can't save people from themselves." It is the truth. People don't want to deal with things that they feel they are powerless to overcome. They don't want to know, they don't want to fight, they don't want to make waves and draw attention to themselves, and they don't want to prepare. They will deal with whatever comes along just as they always have, not realizing the seriousness and scope of what they will face.

Honestly, when the time comes, it will be too late to help them.

reply to post by gwydionblack


Op,

Even the most casual walk through of the threads of ATS will tell you why your attempts at "education" have failed.

We live in an era of subjective reality.

Nobody wants to hear what you have to say because their own personal reality tells them yours is a lie.

Was the Norway spiral a Rocket? A wormhole cause by Haarp? A wormhole caused by aliens? a test of project bluebeam?

You will find in nearly equal measure people willing to defend each and they will call you a disinformation agent if you do not believe as they do.

Truth has been deemed "deadly dull" and people have replaced it with dial up psuedo-facts from the internet that support their worldview.


[edit on 22-2-2010 by Helmkat]

This city is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Save us!"... and I'll whisper... "no."

i feel ya brother.

Originally posted by gwydionblack
I wanted to help the people... I really do. I have prepared myself for the worst

I'm tired of fighting a losing battle. The people can have the truth smacking them in the face and they will still ignore it.

But now I can't. I can't rightfully move on with my life without trying to do something about it. I can't just go on as if nothing ever happened. I have this idea in my head that I will change this world no matter if it costs me my life and I will not back down from that.

However, from the people... I don't know. I am exhausted from fighting so hard with no results

Then the people will turn to me and those like me... they will call out for help and finally admit to the truth. They will beg - "Save us!"

They will then hear the most frightening reality to ever cross their minds...

"No."

If you need to argue, make smaller points. Talk about the people in the east without no electricity or heat due to two 30 inch snowstorms in a week. Talk about the people in the southwest who couldn't buy water/milk/bread and who had to drive 150 miles or more to find a hotel room because the whole area had electric lines downed by ice for 10 days. Talk about the people in New Orleans who died because they had no diabetic drugs with them.

Or just decide to feed anybody who shows up at your door until the food is gone.

reply to post by gwydionblack


Stop trying to change the world.

CHANGE THE WORLD : LIVE FREE !

You ( and nobody like us ) will never get the power to "speak" to the sheeple ...

But between speaks and acts, I prefer acts : be free : you are your own world : if you are not at the level of your opinion : don't try to be a model.

Understand what i am saying : for the third time : the sheeple allways follow : they don't think , don't try to speak to their consciouness : they refuse to have one : but if you become a model in the reality : with the reality you live : maybe some of the sheeple will follow ( even if they don't really understand why ).

And for the last time : you don't need 6 billion people to be like you : be right and you will be the right man, who will accept to live, and to die.

I can understand what you are saying and feeling. I started my truth journey about 5 years ago. I was so shocked that I wanted to share with everyone - I even gave a seminar at the church I attended at that time on 9/11 and why the official story was full of holes. But people just backed away and thought I was a conspiracy loony. I became depressed and realized that I could not force anyone to know what they did not want to know. I have not stopped but now I focus on my own research and if an opportunity presents itself I speak to another.

As an adult, I had 2 primary wake up calls - the assassination of JFK and realizing it was a coup by usa insiders and then 9/11 - Both were shocks to my system but 9/11 opened up the flood gates and I began to read the real history of this country and the industrial world. After that nothing looked the same to me - nothing.

One thing to realize is that each person comes to this in their own time - when they are ready to know about this system - I was not ready in 2001 and could not fathom that this was done by those inside our system - granted they are part of the shadow govt but I did not even understand that there was a shadow govt. - So, I look back at myself in 2001 and try to have a bit of sympathy. Yet, I have no sympathy for those who just refuse to question because they are so frightened and cannot look at the controllers and war mongers and intelligence agencies, etc.

Don't quit this journey of discovery - actually, I don't think one can quit once you begin traveling this pathway. And don't get discouraged because more and more people are waking up each day. I believe this is a spiritual battle - there is a battle for the human soul - it truly is good vs. evil - Satan is working overtime but God's has a plan for the earth and for us - and it is God's plan that will stand - never forget that.

Originally posted by LurkerMan
when they degrade you or slander you for trying to help them, just brush it off and shovel 'em to the "them" pile. "they" dont want to be saved.

Can you sweep me too while you are cleaning up? I'd like to go into the pile who doesn't NEED to be saved

-Kyo

Here's the thing you are missing.

You believe that it's incredibly important to be "awake" or "maintaining reality" whereas, these other folks feel just as important about "maintaining reality" as well, it's just a different perspective on reality.

Thus is the lament of the prophets...

"Johna was a prophet... ooo... oooo.... but he never really got it... sad but true..."


The real issue here though, is that you seem to have an issue with sales. Honestly, you are in the business of sales, but just can't deal with rejection. You are selling an idea, a concept, a meme, but many folks just ain't buying... why? Because you haven't showed them anything about their current meme that isn't working except for the fact that it might be wrong.

Think of the parable of the sower... some seed lands on the rock, some on soil, some gets watered, and some dries up and drifts away...

If you don't like sowing... or in this case "Selling an alternate reality", then stop. It's as simple as that... nothing says you should do this or that... life is completely up to us... allow your fellow man to be happy in his/her beliefs... it's really not that important that everyone wake up, unless you just need companionship :-)

As it is, you seem to have put yourself on a "high horse" as your post appears to condescend people who don't see things the way you do.

It is possible to be just as sure of your own reality and still allow others to be just as sure of theirs... it's called individualism. If you own your own reality, really take the authority over it, then it doesn't matter who does or doesn't agree with you...



[edit on 22-2-2010 by HunkaHunka]

reply to post by gwydionblack


Grass (life) grows trough the asphalt, or on it. It does not fight the asphalt, it just grows where it can. Just be yourself, remain "alive", ignore the machine. If you feel you want to keep spreading the truth - do it, if you feel you want something else - the same.

"The world is full of people who stopped listening to themselves" - Joseph Campbell

[edit on 22-2-2010 by pai mei]

I feel you man. I officially awoke at 16 although I was suspicious of why society is the way it is since I was 15. All I can say is, instead of going all out at once, try to start with yourself. Teach your wife and your children what you know, what you know in your heart and mind to be the actual reality that everyone lives in, so that they may know what you know and suffer the massive ignorance and apathy that the majority of society suffers. Also, another big problem that humanity has as a whole, is the thinking that they cant do anything, aka low self-esteem at its extreme. People underestimate the power that they have alone, let alone the power that the people could have if everyone came together.

[edit on 10/5/09 by OutlanderHuman24]

Hi, Gwydionblack

Haven't read every single post yet but decided to post anyway

A few years ago there was a guy on the Isle of Wight who'd invested everything he possessed (including his inheritance, according to him) into his website, 'Stop Chemtrails NOW' (I think that was the title)

He desperately wanted to make the world aware of Chemtrails and put in endless hours online

I first encountered him in a forum. Read some of his posts. And accepted his open invitation for people to visit his website

Read his website and yes, he'd put a lot of work into it. You could tell by the way he wrote and what he wrote that he was deeply committed

He'd apparently also made arrangements for online-friends to contact him at his home and otherwise on regular basis, because he believed he was under threat. So he was tired and exhausted, but he kept pushing himself

I emailed him in token support and suggested he devote a bit of time to his own health and welfare. I mean, you can't run a mental and emotional marathon every day when there's nothing left in the tank. Anyway, I sent what I believed to be a friendly, supportive message

In response, he emailed back, basically chastising me for not making a donation. He said he'd lost everything, that he'd put everything into exposing Chemtrails and now had nothing, while the rest of us were doing fine --- benefiting from his efforts and sacrifice but sacrificing nothing ourselves

I didn't respond because it was clear he was very despondent, burnt out and turning on the world he was trying to save. I felt sorry for him and especially so if he responded to others as he had to me, because it would mean he was alienating people

If you're tired and exhausted, take a break. Make it a conscious break. Declare in writing, if need be, that the next three months will be 'world problems' free. And stick to it. It will provide you new perspective and recharge your battery, realign your priorities and provide incentive for you to devote time and thought to your health, relationships and future

Anytime the old thoughts and anxieties try to sneak onto the screen of your mind --- erase them with an imaginary blackboard eraser or windshield wiper ... erase, erase

And be assured that all the old problems (and more) will still be there should you want to return to your quest

Best wishes

reply to post by gwydionblack


Yes my friend.
This is happening to me also.

I can relate. I totally understand. The frustration, the hopelessness and I have no doubt you really want to wake people up and do good. Just like me.

I've had several recurrencies of nervous breakdown, and I mean it, no more no less, just because of that. because of the utter frustration of not being listened to. And I wasn't even trying too hard.

People live in a bubble, I think we can agree with that, and when it will burst, they're #ed. Unfortunately, we must accept that it is right, courageous and even heroic to struggle to wake them up - but maybe, not the wisest thing to do.

Maybe it is wisest to keep our health for what is impossible and limit ourselves to NON VIOLENT positive action towards what we believe is good and right. This is a HUGE and heroic struggle by itself: not giving in, not becoming a stupid. Standing there as an example, while all act strange and don't recognize that we're the only or on of the few non-idiot persons they can talk to, and they would benefit much more from being close to us, rather than keeping having their utterly fake fun with their current toys and people, which to them, is the same thing. For many people a girlfriend or boyfriend or just friend are merely toys, they do not recognize the true virtue, the quality of people which is not the one of a toy or object. They seem not to be able to distinguish, anymore, between something that is priceless, and something that is cheap. For them, one or the other is the same. Just like a kid, who doesn't certainly distinguish a very "expensive", sophisticated toy from the #in' plastic bull# they buy today. The kid actually prefers the ugly toy, he likes it more, because his mind is as cheap as the plastic toy. His mind does not deserve the privileged toy. He wouldn't know how to enjoy it, it's just beyond him.

Still, the amazing toy he leaves in the corner has immense worth. But he'll never recognize that.

This is, indeed, sad. This is the challenge of good people today, staying there, in the corner, unrecognized, and still be there with love, never lower their standard. For the actual social situation privileges low profile behavior, relationships and lifestyle, let alone the philosophies, entertainment and culture of the mass today, that are of an equally poor level. Somebody in the board mentioned how even videogame of today are three hundred times less entertaining, producing less contentement and exhilaration than their retrò counterparts, those throghly enjoyable videogames made in the 80s and 90s. Even entertainment isn't really entertaining, with very few exceptions - generally, movies and music of yesterday are simply better, and people were enjoying themselves much more.

Today, it's simply a manic delirium, people force themselves to have fun with that utterly unentertaining entertainment, they fool themselves into thinking it's fun, look at them. Can you count the fake smiles, the laughs about nothing that people perform every day? It's crazy. People just don't have fun anymore. They're just numb.

So I mean, I think you know it all already. See, I feel tired just writing about this. I don't know why. Maybe it's the beast that wants to discourage me from fighting it.

And you know what. I'm not gonna fight it. I'll just make it die. Because this is what I see. A dying beast. It's not in health anymore, it's in trouble - but of course, way too proud of itself and his low quality, to admit that it's struggling. But it is. And we can rejoice in that. For soon we'll win. I know at times it's hard to believe. But I'm sure, most of the time you know that it's all gonna pass, and that you'll have your reward. Justice does exist, even when people don't believe in it or don't know what it is.

(continues in next post)

reply to post by gwydionblack


I could have an easier time of accepting your message if it wasn't delivered in that goofy literary style. Talk to me man to man without all that phony, pompous, self aggrandizing, arrogant, patronizing manner.

If that is the way you talk to your friends and family; no wonder you meet resistance.

and I'm with Kyo

Can you sweep me too while you are cleaning up? I'd like to go into the pile who doesn't NEED to be saved

I'm perfectly capable of making my own decisions without being saved.






[edit on 22-2-2010 by whaaa]