Rape? It's the fault of the victims, say 50 per cent of women

reply to post by antonia


what do you mean it's not a trend? if you research a bit you'll find lots of stories of women who at one point remembered they're ladies and decided to accuse someone of rape. there are women who do it for all sorts of reasons.. to prove that they're not trashy to their friends or bf who started to believe otherwise, because they have a grudge or simply to make money.

here's one of the HUNDREDS of documented cases

to be honest, i think that most of the cases that get reported are false because real rape victims are often to traumatised and just want to get that episode behind them

Absolutely OUTRAGEOUS. One I want to know where this survey group was found, and who it consisted of, because NO WOMAN I KNOW (and I know a bunch of em) have EVER said it is the womans fault she got raped.

Not even if her friend was drunk.

Not even if her sister was wearing a miniskirt.

Not even if her mother got lost driving in a new city.

Not even if her grandmother trusted the wrong caregiver.

Not even if her aunt's car blew a tire on the wrong night while driving home from work.

RAPE IS NEVER THE WOMANS FAULT.

There is NOTHING ELSE TO SAY.

If anyone here thinks a woman can contribute to her rape, GET RE EDUCATED.

A woman is drunk at a party and gets raped. IT IS NOT HER FAULT her rapist was such a filthy pig he committed the heinous crime of RAPE against a vulnerable woman. A REAL MAN would have helped her, put her in bed, let her sleep it off,etc. A RAPIST RAPES HER.

RAPE IS ABOUT POWER NOT SEX.

Deny IGNORANCE, and get educated, men, this is frightening.
*************************************************
I am very skeptical of this survey.

FIRST.

Its in the Daily Mail, a UK Rag.

SECOND.

I cannot find an independent source for the survey.

reply to post by Ionut


Ok, present your hundreds of cases then. I don't want one. One is not enough to constitute anything.

Ask them again after they are raped themselves.

Second

Third line

Originally posted by hotbakedtater
RAPE IS NEVER THE WOMANS FAULT.

there have been cases, although few, of women overpowering men and doing things of a sexual nature to them

and let's not forget about the made up cases which we can blame on the women

You have to consider the age of the women asked. It says the age range that most likely will blame their fellow woman is 18 to 24. That crowd are what? PARTY GIRLS, COLLEGE GIRLS, SOCIAL GIRLS

The RAPE they know or think about is all revolved around going to the bar, the club, the frat party, etc... which in my experiance would tell me they have experience with their fellow girls getting trashed, hanging out with jerk offs for men, living that lifestyle of thinking getting high and drunk is cool, and NOT being mature enough to understand that there are animals among them looking at them as prey. Then those at that age who hear about someone being raped will automaticlly assume she is just crying wolf because she slept with a guy she shouldn't have, or in their minds she should of been more careful consuming alcohol or trusting the hot frat guy who sleeps with as many chicks as he can, but on this night made susie feel special by saying all the right things.

Again I think the age of those in this survey explains A LOT...IMO

I cannot believe all of the muddying of the waters with the Faux Rape what if false accusation scenerios. Maybe that should be a different thread, because those cases are NOT RAPE.

If you as a man willingly put your member in a woman who is NOT SOBER, and the next morning she leaves, goes to the police and files RAPE charges against you, guess what?

YOU RAPED A WOMAN.

If sober consent cannot be given, and you as a man go ahead, YOU ARE A RAPIST.

There is no excuse.

It boils down to responsibility for your own actions. The only ACTION the female is responsible for is GETTING DRUNK not GETTING RAPED.

I cannot BELIEVE how uneducated so many people are on this subject, and how disgusting the attitudes of some men towards females really truly are.

Thank you for this thread, Dock.

Very educational.

reply to post by antonia


sorry dear, I don't keep records. if you look into the matter, you will find tens of cases in the last decade in north america alone and it's fair to assume that only a fraction get reported on by the media.

Don't know if the UK tv-series, 'Ladettes to Ladies' has been shown in the US. If so, you'll gain an idea of the sort of female behaviour that I suspect (could be wrong of course) the article linked in the OP is primarily referring to

For example, in one segment I watched, the girls were permitted to go into the village for a girls' night out, as a reward. Yes, it was undoubtedly exaggerated for the cameras, but the girls hit the alcohol like mad, one glass after another, straight down. And binge drinking females is a topic that seems to get a lot of publicity in UK publications, etc.

So there were the girls, some of them wildly drunk, in tiny little skirts, playing pool with a group of village lads, bending over the pool table like wannabe porno stars and writhing against the guys aggressively

The men didn't know what do to. And who could blame them ? They were being issued explicit invitation, yet obviously if they'd responded, they'd be accused of being 'opportunists' and 'animals'. So they were being deliberately teased, yet knew that society expected them to play the role of good little soldiers

One of the girls jumped up on a table and did a cheap writhe and grind. She may as well have been naked

This is a double standard. If a man goes into a bar and deliberately provokes a group of men by slapping their faces or insulting them, no-one would champion his cause if he was rewarded by a few good punches to the jaw. People would say, ' He asked for it '. And that would be true

So I suspect the 50% of women in the UK survey who believed some women were at least partly to blame for their rapes were referring to the sort of behaviours detailed above, rather than unprovoked attacks on women going about their daily lives

You know, if the burqa would actually protect a woman from sexual assault, it would ALMOST be worth it. But, sadly, it does not.. Here at the ripe old age of 55, I still won't go for a walk at night without my 100 pound dog at my side, even in the relatively safe little town that I live in. If only men could understand how the threat of rape limits the lives of women. Well, I know there are plenty of men who get it, but why are there still so many who do not?

Originally posted by Ionut
reply to post by antonia

 

sorry dear, I don't keep records. if you look into the matter, you will find tens of cases in the last decade in north america alone and it's fair to assume that only a fraction get reported on by the media.

Firstly, you don't know me. Don't come over here with your sexist patronizing. If you can't back up your claims do not make them. I can prove my claims by showing you at least 5 studies with wildly different results-in other words there is no consensus. If there is no consensus it is because there is no hard data or there happen to be agendas at play.

[edit on 15-2-2010 by antonia]

if you get really drunk at a bar and leave with some random guy and he ends up raping you? sorry. thats just as much your fault as it is his. it was preventable if the woman was acting responsibly.

reply to post by devilishlyangelic23


NO.

That's like telling someone "You left the bar with some random guy and he killed you? Sorry, that's your fault."

Rape is the responsibility of ONE person....the rapist. Period.

Guys, think about this. If you want to blame the woman for "dressing or acting provocatively," what does this say about you? That you cannot control yourself? In my opinion, this is the reason why some folks want women to wear a burqa.....gotta protect those weak men from any lustful thoughts.

I'm a rape survivor. I knew my rapist. I went with him into the woods to play some card games. We didn't play games.

In retrospect, I should never have gone into the woods. Does that make me as responsible as this guy who raped me?

What if I tell you he was 17 and I was 13? Does that change your views any?

How about if I tell you he was a friend of the family, someone I viewed as a brother, and that I'd known him most of my life? Does that change your view?

If you want to start blaming victims for crimes, then carry this over to ALL crimes. And that includes robbery, murder, etc.

reply to post by Dock9


I worked in bars for years. Do you know how uncommon that kind of behavior is? Dance floor antics are to be expected but general lewdness is only tolerated in the cheapest of places. Most women are just sitting at tables drinking and occasionally dancing. This sensationalized crap you see on TV is just that-sensationalized crap.

If you walk around flashing your cash, you'd be more likely to get mugged. If a woman walks about flashing her 'assets' then she's increasing her chance of being raped.

The blame doesn't lie with the victim, but with the victimiser. But women need to protect themselves more and try to avoid bad situation.

I've seen women rolling about the streets drunk and alone at the weekend with mini-skirts on and no jacket. I've heard stories of women accepting lifts from strangers after clubbing at the weekend. I've seen plenty of woman walking home alone very very late at night. As a women, i would never do any of these, but i see them a lot. These are all situations that can go bad if you're in the wrong place at the wrong time. It's not worth the risk.

Perhaps the ones that blame themselves more blame themselves for getting into a stupid situation in the first place. The ones that say it's their own fault obviously haven't been raped and are just being bitchy.

As long as there are men who can't control themselves, women need to be more in control of themselves to avoid nasty situations.

[edit on 15-2-2010 by Nammu]

I will share REAL statistics with you all. These stats are from the last quarter of 2009 (October, November, December) at my agency.

Rape Claims Filed: 11

Rape Claims w/ evidence: 2

Rape Claims made within 24 hours of accusation: 2

Cases with leads or forensic data for warrant: 2

Evidence of false statement by accuser: 7

Cold Cases: 2

Cases Solved w/ arrest of rapist: 2

Claims to be found fraudulent or without probable cause: 7

Charges filed on false accusations: 4


So that is what we dealt with in the last 3 months at just my agency. So yes false claims are made ALL THE TIME. And just to give you some insight. The 4 women charged for false accusations/statements were broken down as follows:

1 - Charged after admitting she lied because the guy she had sex with told her he just wasn't interested in her as more than friends.

3 - Charged after admitting they accused their partner of rape because they did not want their husbands to find out about their affairs. All three cases were found that a fellow girlfriend informed the husband of each that their wife was cheating, and when confronted they said they had been raped and the husband was found in all three cases to push the criminal charges, which makes sense, but it ended up bckfiring on the women.

So yes it does happen, but it DOESN'T affect they way we go after the real scumbags and help those who truly need it.

reply to post by Dock9


OMG you are NOT serious?? She was INVITING RAPE?

No!!!

She was, as one of those commenting observed, a SAD DRUNK OLD WOMAN!!

So by her drunken behavior, which was CLEARLY NOT turning anyone on, you say, she INVITES RAPE?

I say a RAPIST rapes.

I say REAL MEN do what REAL MEN do...they try to sober her up, call her a cab/the police for public intox so she can sober up safely in the drunk tank, there are 1000000000000000000000000 things a MAN can do in this situation before he CHOOSES to rape.

Deny ignorance!!!! Please.

Originally posted by Koolcdj69
I am not saying the blame is on women, but when or if women dress in like a manner that would interest a crazy lunatic guy, it gets him which can be in a way a women's fault, knowing what they are wearing or exposing of themselves may suade a crazy guy into doing something.

That is saying that it is another person's fault for your decisions. uhm. No way. Every single adult is responsible for their own choices and behaviors. To blame another for that is called narcissism.

Rape, under no circumstances is the fault of the victim, it is ALWAYS no matter what the "fault" of the perpetrator.

Until people learn to take responsibility for their own actions, this will be a society that will continue to blame someone else for the choices made.

A terrorist bomber? It's the enemies fault for not believing as they do. A war? It's their fault for not giving away their oil. A murder? It's their fault for being in the way. A break in? It's their fault for not having a stronger lock on their door. A rape? It's the victims fault for wearing a skirt, standing such a way, drinking such an amount, smiling at the rapist.

Get it?

In all actuality, it is the PERPETRATORS fault in every single case. Not the victims.

Harm None

reply to post by rcwj1975


No one proclaimed it didn't happen. What is being disputed is the frequency at which it happens.

[edit on 15-2-2010 by antonia]

Personally I am not sure 1,000 Londoners are representative of UK attitudes, tho I am sure there are situations where men and women could be a bit more cautious..

But then agian I was young and about as cautious as a bull in a china shop..

I was in the South of Italy with my girlfriend, we where offered free drinks in the bar where we where staying and only saved from kidnapping by friends who understood the danger we put ourselves in..

"Who in the right mind thinks drinks all night are free to tourists! doh"

Sadly there are some unpleasant people in the world who will take advantage of anyone they can with any means at their disposal..



[edit on 15/2/10 by thoughtsfull]

Originally posted by Agit8dChop
Its a very TOUGH subject to distinguish.

Women have a lot of power here, and can seriously screw a mans life up if she's vindictive about something.

1. False rape claims. If a woman cries rape, people usually believe it.

2. If a women walks down a dodgy street in a miniskirt that might as well be a belt, a strapless top showing more than the imagination can ponder, while walking seductivley, then.. im afraid to say but your just attracting scum..

Is this the womans fault if she's raped? NO.

But she must take SOME responsibility for putting her self in that situation.

Put a roast chicken in front of a starving man he will eat it.
Put a skanky clad women in front of a bunch of horny drunk men in a dark alley, your going to get raped.

I can't believe I actually starred one of your posts, but I did. I completely agree with what you said.