Originally posted by ProtoplasmicTraveler
Rape is definitely never the fault of the victim but ...
Learning street awareness, situational awareness, common sense and even learning to listen to one’s own sixth sense is something all women and men
should actively develop as a helpful deterent against all forms of violent crimes.
An ounce of prevention is after all worth a pound of cure.
I agree with your statements ProtoplasmicTraveler. ...When I think about where I've been, and walked, and the strangers I have talked to from Jamaica
to Montreal to New York and LA,, I know I could have been raped, even killed, hundreds of times. Didn't happen though. For example:
1. - A man once held a 10-inch butcher knife at my throat for about 3 hours while we talked. In the end, he threw up his hands, called me a "lamb"
and let me go.
2. - In the middle of the bussing riots in Boston, I sat in the black section at the back of the bus (I'm white) then got off at a deserted part of
the arboretum - 2 angry black guys got off with me, and frankly, it was a threatening situation. But we talked, and parted "friends." (I did tell
them I was Canadian. Often a trump card.
...I have the "skills" you talk about, and a weird blend of strength, respect and innocence. But I'm also incredibly lucky and I think that's
what's always saved me...
Few rapes occur when a "nice guy" loses control. Rape is about
control, not sex - certain predators need to rape to get off. They NEED the
fear, they need to know that they are imposing their will on someone weaker. That's what it's all about - not sexual need.
So - dealing with nice, decent guys and full-out predators are 2 different things. ...and most women are not able to recognize real predators, never
mind handle them.
Education - "learning street awareness, situational awareness, common sense and even learning to listen to one’s own sixth sense" - all help.
So does isolating oneself in one's sewing room, and avoiding the real world.
Which I suspect is why
so many women blame rape victims for being victimized - because those victims had the temerity to try to live
It's an envy thing.