What made you gay or lesbian?

1.Some feel they are born gay/lesbian.
2.Attraction to another person's soul.(my favorite answer so far)
3.How they were raised.
4.How they were treated by the opposite sex.
All very good answers.When you have a better understanding of people,
you will become a better person as well.

reply to post by yzzyUK


Yes,there are people who still think like that and I'm one of them!

Originally posted by yzzyUK

Originally posted by jinx880101
We even shared a room at hostel, but never ever did ANYTHING. Now why would we still have the hots for each other???? The only thing I can think of is energy. Or, you want what you can't have... but I'm leaning towards the energy.

Interesting, my best friend knows I have the hots for her and has admitted she gets turned on by me but nothing has ever happened [have known her since 1991] She says she fancies me but is straight and wouldn't go further than fantasising about me [which she does a lot of apparently both when alone or with her hubby!]

She was incredibly jealous when I was with my last GF and can't understand how my husband can just sit back and let me live this 'double life' ....

Double life!?! some people can't seem to understand that some men actually love us for the people we are, including sexual preference, and would rather love us and live with us and see us happy, if that includes seeing women too, then to have us pretend that we aren't interested in women too.

If you have to hide who you are, then that's the real 'double life'!

reply to post by yzzyUK


Maybe she doesn't want to spoil the mystery or she is hoping by saying she wouldn't go further than fantasizing, you will test her on her statement? I know that's something I would do If I wanted to kiss Allisen...I would make her think I'm not that interested so that she would make the first move, to test me.

Sorry OP, I know this is off topic

Originally posted by jinx880101
reply to post by bkaust

 

I honestly think it's odd that more women don't want to check other women out! There must be something in THEIR water eh?

Woman are beautiful creatures! They are so sensual, soft, caring and passionate... they are so irresistible, that their own sex can't resist them

But seriously, she looked out for me...protected me. Got jealous when I dated a guy... We even shared a room at hostel, but never ever did ANYTHING. Now why would we still have the hots for each other???? The only thing I can think of is energy. Or, you want what you can't have... but I'm leaning towards the energy.

same again. The girl i was talking about, we talk about how much we want to be together alot, but i've gone down there and stayed a week with her, shared a bed etc, and nothing, nowdays, i don't think it'd be nothing, but sometimes it's just nice to share those thoughts and feelings and have them returned without any pressure or disappointment. Keeps the magic alive!

reply to post by bkaust

and would rather love us and live with us and see us happy, if that includes seeing women too, then to have us pretend that we aren't interested in women too. If you have to hide who you are, then that's the real 'double life'!

So true... I wish that were the case with me. I hate carrying this around with me and not being able to talk about it. Very jealous boyfriend... and suppressing what I really feel, absolutely tears me apart. Makes me wonder if it was just a ''crush' or something more...

I can't understand why it would be of any interest to anyone other than if they were interested in same sex love making... Kinda like people dont care if a person is married or not unless they are wanting to get in closer IYSWIM?

Does it matter what people do in the bedroom... do you ask heterosexual friends if they enjoy doggy style or oral sex?

I'm not meaning to be disrespectful .. I genuinley do not and never have understood why what i do in the bedroom interests people.

the only time my sexuality is mentioned is if

a) I am asked outright
b) I'm interested in another woman and think perhaps me mentioning it might.. you know.. get me noticed! lol
c) If I hear someone talking about 'those gays' I feel I need to stand up and say "Hey you.. I'm one of 'those gays'"

With respect, it seems an unhealthy obsession of certain religious types what 'other' people do in bed!

Originally posted by jinx880101
reply to post by yzzyUK

 

Maybe she doesn't want to spoil the mystery or she is hoping by saying she wouldn't go further than fantasizing, you will test her on her statement?

We've been in situations many a time where I have outright said 'lets get it oooonnn' she goes red and says no she can't because she is straight.. drives me mad!

in a nice way...

reply to post by jinx880101


That is one of the reasons for this thread,feel free to express your thoughts about the topic.Just remember to tone down any sexual
talk.This thread is being run by a christian lady.

Originally posted by jinx880101
I wish that were the case with me. I hate carrying this around with me and not being able to talk about it. Very jealous boyfriend... and suppressing what I really feel, absolutely tears me apart. Makes me wonder if it was just a ''crush' or something more...

that's awful!

Your relationship with your man isn't an honest one and is hurting you!

When I met my husband and realised he was interested in more than just friendship I said I was BiPoly.... he smiled a wicked smile and I said "NO, not a swinger!!" lmao

he understands that I only have one man in my life, him, and that from time to time I have a woman in my life too... It's who I am. It is who he married....

My ex on the other hand back in 1991 wouldn't let me talk about it and said what happened before I met him was just 'sillyness' ... I left him sharpish! lol

reply to post by yzzyUK


I never mentioned having any interest in what others do behind closed
doors.I am not a voyeur.

reply to post by yzzyUK


I disagree that the obsession with who is having sex with who is wholly a religious obsession. The recent Tiger Woods obsession had nothing to do with religion and was a media obsession. Furthermore, I have known plenty of gay people, and the main reason I know they are gay is because they told me so unsolicited. I have never asked another man or woman if they are gay.

I have known several gay men who can't shut up about their sexual escapades, and what it means to be gay and blah, blah, blah. Indeed, if I get prudish with them and ask them to tone it down, they begin accusing me of being homophobic. I was once invited to go to the "gay parade" with a few of them and I explained I didn't like parades, and they insisted it was because I was homophobic!

I am not saying all gay people are obsessed with being gay, and for all I know I very well may have friends who are gay and not know it because they've never felt compelled to tell me and I never asked. But, there are plenty of gay people who are just as obsessed with talking about their gay behavior as there are straight people obsessed with talking about it too.

As I have said, it is not just gay sex but sex in general that sells, and sells and tends to permeate the social fabric of our times.

Originally posted by jinx880101
reply to post by bkaust

 

and would rather love us and live with us and see us happy, if that includes seeing women too, then to have us pretend that we aren't interested in women too. If you have to hide who you are, then that's the real 'double life'!

So true... I wish that were the case with me. I hate carrying this around with me and not being able to talk about it. Very jealous boyfriend... and suppressing what I really feel, absolutely tears me apart. Makes me wonder if it was just a ''crush' or something more...

I'm sorry that you have to feel suffocated by holding it in. Maybe if you explain to him that you love him and your feelings don't make you care for him any less? My relationship is what it is because i flat out said 'look this is what i am and if you dont like it not you can leave' and i mentioned said friend and said that i have always liked her, always will, and he will not get in the way of that relationship, no matter what.

It's up to you, but it's not good for you mentally or physically to hold in your true feelings. It can lead to resentment and all sorts of things, i hope you can work towards being more open with him, but it takes time, U2U me if you ever wanna chat

Originally posted by mamabeth
reply to post by yzzyUK

 

I never mentioned having any interest in what others do behind closed
doors.I am not a voyeur.

Yeah sorry I put it wrong and dramatised it.. but when it comes down to it it is what is done behind those closed doors that makes them 'different' enough to ask what the cause was.

I guess I mean... will you start a thread on here asking

"What made you heterosexual?"

reply to post by yzzyUK


What made me heterosexual? A very good question,here is the answer.
I accepted Jesus as my Saviour and turned my life over to Him.

reply to post by mamabeth


Serious question - had you not done that, do you think you'd now be a lesbian?

reply to post by MrDesolate


No,I would probably have turned out bi,but I didn't.I have devoted my
life to my Saviour and my husband.

Originally posted by mamabeth
reply to post by yzzyUK

 

What made me heterosexual? A very good question,here is the answer.
I accepted Jesus as my Saviour and turned my life over to Him.

Hm.

My thoughts about this thread and your postings: I think you feel uneasy and a little afraid of the increasing sings of homosexuality in the world. Quite logical, considering your relatively strong Christianity.
I'm from The Netherlands, as you can see, and reading this thread evokes a very strange feeling in me. But troubles accepting the natural cause of one's sexuality always evokes a strange feeling. Why is it so hard to understand?

Let me give you some advice: try to be a little more open minded. I don't mean to be offensive or even negative about the whole thread, for I think everyone has plenty to learn in life. but you might want to step outside the box sometimes, and see what's out there. I'm a religious atheist (I don't believe in a religious-like god), but nevertheless I keep my mind open, and I believe in a system, or a general 'power' in the multiverse.
By the way, the reason you see more sings of homosexuality is plainly because it becomes more accepted. Not something in the water.

Try to keep an open mind

[edit on 13-1-2010 by -Thom-]

Originally posted by mamabeth
reply to post by yzzyUK

 

What made me heterosexual? A very good question,here is the answer.
I accepted Jesus as my Saviour and turned my life over to Him.

Are we to assume then that you were 'born again' before you reached a point of sexual awareness, or did your orientation resolve itself as a result of conversion.

Barring that, is this to say you were born a Christian, and everything else just followed?

We seem to be entering a discussion of nature or nurture...and according to Christianity, nature dictates that we are born in sin. Homosexuality seems generally to be nature...not sure where nurture fits in, though it can apparently be a factor.

Do we understand, Mama Beth...that we are discussing two different things here, and that sexual orientation and religion are as compatible a discussion as...shal we say, Buildings and Food?

It seems to me that 'seeing the light' wasn't quite the thirst quencher mama thought it would be.