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What is Your Number 1 Pet hate?

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posted on Jan, 25 2010 @ 07:52 PM
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Urgh.. I have another major pet hate.

Looking at facebook albums that I should be avoiding like the plague, damn my nosyness! :bnghd:




posted on Jan, 26 2010 @ 04:39 AM
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Personalised car number plates. People spend thousands on these things, which have an instrinsic value of about £10, so that they can have something that vaguely resembles their name emblazoned on the front of their mundane German car. How vain.



posted on Jan, 26 2010 @ 06:28 AM
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Well this is very specific and you don't play left 4 dead you won't know what I mean but I HATE RAGE QUITTERS!! they should have the game taken away from them and be made to sit quietly for a while and think about what they've done!

(for the enlightenment of those not fortunate enough to own left 4 dead or L4D2, A rage quit is the act of leaving a game in progress midway through a game because one's team is losing and one cannot take it)

I want a little zombie emoticon thingy but there isn't one...

:shk: (best I could do)



posted on Jan, 26 2010 @ 11:26 AM
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reply to post by Bluebelle
 


I've actually never seen those movies and I am stunned they used your obviously inferior cathedral for it! Da Vinci...Da Vinci...wasn't he the ine who came up with the idea of dusting slippers for cats? Amongst other strokes of genius of course.

Haha, I must congratulate you on 6th place, pretty darn impressive. "Car crime and high burgulary rates.........but cheap houses!"
You have to take the rough with the smooth I suppose. What are you planning to do to improve on 6th place? Smash up a few phone boxes? Or maybe get yourself an ASBO? Perhaps even start your own little street gang and target the elderly? You might even get a visit from Ross Kemp if your lucky. Mansfield is your lobster!


Couldn't believe The Kyle news.



This show isn't about me; it is about their issues and problems and how we can face them together


That was a joke right? It's even called 'The Jeremy Kyle Show' it couldn't be more about him if he tried. Which I reckon he has.

You'll never guess who I saw today.......www.hope.ac.uk...

Rolf Harris....in the flesh


* Just realised that list was from 2005! In 2007 Mansfield had slipped to 9th, tut, tut. Quit living in the past


[edit on 05/08/2009 by LiveForever8]



posted on Jan, 26 2010 @ 06:05 PM
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Pet hate for today - solicitors. Went to one with my sister today as she's going through a custody battle with her ex, because he wants the children full time. Bloody solicitor spent about 30 mins telling my sister who's moving to a different house next week not to do it because the court will see it as the kids being uprooted & wont like it. Even though her exes house is about to be repossessed anyway so either way the children will be moving house.
Stupid bint. :bash:

reply to post by LiveForever8
 


You've never seen The Da Vinci Code?!... Actually, you've probably saved yourself a couple of precious hours by not watching it. With all the drama that goes on you'd think there would be a decent ending. But no, Tom Hanks doesnt get laid, and the girl who *might* be a descendant of Jesus has no cool powers. Let down.

Haha, Im not living in the past! Im merely celebrating Mansfield's wonderful history. I think we need more drive-by's & gang warfare to up our place in the list. Maybe a serial killer or two as well.

Its ALL about Jezza. There's no shame in him admitting it. The shows purpose is simply to stroke Jeremy's ego. I cant wait to see him putting some insane, gangster type men in their place. 'Look sunshine, I dont care if Tyrese showed you disrespect, it is not an excuse to pop a cap in his ass'.

KEN DODD! eeeeee... that almost pleases me as much as Rolf.
What the hell is it with Liverpool.. why do you get all these amazing celebrities?! I bet its something to do with that laser.

*Edit - has anyone seen DarkCyrus recently? He's not posted anything since his delightful 'so this thing went into my brain' thread on the 15th. I hope he isnt dead, or worse, kidnapped by fairies.


[edit on 26/1/10 by Bluebelle]



posted on Jan, 26 2010 @ 07:12 PM
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reply to post by Bluebelle
 


Well thanks for ruining that for me! I rushed out today and bought the films and couldnt wait to watch them...I wont bother now
Tom Hanks never gets laid......his kid in Forrest Gump is questionable, did he get laid in 'Big'? Even that is borderline paedophilia.

Serial killers and gang warfare seem to be big plus's when considering this list. My area has nothing like that
The big news in my area recently was that a tree fell over, nobody was even hurt, lame. No it was not in the woods and yes it did make a sound.

I can't help thinking Jezza has bitten off more than he can chew with this bold step. Our version is going to look tame compared to those rootin' tootin' shootin' yanks. I hope he goes out in a blaze of glory and joins those legends like Gandhi and Lennon who tried to make the world a better place.

Haha, it was magical. A friend of a friend got pictures with him and everything. Ken Dodd is a winner too. It's true ever since the laser we have had legends flock to Liverpool


There is a distinct lack of 'I am an alien' threads lately, are we missing something? All of ATS's resident aliens have been quiet of late, hmm......

It is a bit worrying that DarkCyrus' last thread was titled 'so this thing went into my brain'......maybe he was being serious



posted on Jan, 26 2010 @ 08:35 PM
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reply to post by LiveForever8
 


Ive actually sent him a message enquiring as to his current dead/not dead status:

'from: Bluebelle
sent: 26/1/10 at 07:27 PM
Dude.. are you alive? Sorry for being nosy, just mildly concerned after the content of your most recent thread/posts.

If you havent passed over, let us know.. and if you have, well... RIP.

That is all
'

The only time Tom Hanks ever got laid was in The Green Mile.. but that doesnt count really because it was his wife and she was a minger.
Its only Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt that get all the women, and rightly so I think!

Haha, a 'friend of a friend of a friends second cousin, twice removed hairdresser' was it


There's never anything interesting going on in Mansfield, Lincolns the place to be for exciting news stories. There's this group of lads I know who steal the funny one's from the board outside spar, there's been some absolute gems..

'MAN LOOSE WITH HAMMER AND BLOWTORCH'
'MAN HAD 2 MILLION VOLT STUN GUN'
'KITTEN KILLED WITH 12 BORE SHOTGUN'

Delightful.

Completely unrelated, but Im buying a new tshirt and cant bring myself to choose just one as they are all equally brilliant:

'Paul Gadd is my Dad'
'Trust me I have a beard'
'1984-2008 Practical Joke World Champion'
Decisions, decisions!



posted on Jan, 27 2010 @ 07:59 AM
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Pet hates today......

People who used their credit card to pay for small items like the man in front of me in the queue who used his to pay for some crumpets that cost 50p! Or the woman who used hers to pay for 69p grease proof paper!

Also, people with dogs who say they don't bite only to find out at my own expense that they do! In general though all people who say their dog doesn't bite are lying......

I love women, but I feel like you can’t trust some of them. Some of them are liars, you know? Like I was in the park and I met this girl, she was cute and she had a dog. And I went up to her, we started talking. She told me her dog’s name. Then I said, “Does he bite?”. She said “No.” And I said, “Oh yeah? Then how does he eat? ... Liar.” - Demetri Martin



reply to post by Bluebelle
 


Oh you are a worrier, I'm sure he will appreciate you being concerned. The smiley face is an inspired touch.

Tom only got laid then because that mental fella cured his penis stinging problem. I bet Leo and Brad would have gone through the pain barrier and carried on as usual, they can't help themselves. The Beach was on the other night, quality film, and yes of course Leo gets laid...twice!

Haha, noooooooo, actually it was my cousins friend who I sort of know. Do I need photographic evidence of all these things to please you? Where is the trust?


Bromborough, where I am at the moment, is dead.


In Bromborough Rake there is "The Archers" which is Bromborough's longest standing pub which has plenty of history, with a warm and friendly atomosphere.


The person who wrote that either owns The Archers or has never actually been there. Most of that 'history' can be found in police records and as for it's 'warm and friendly atmosphere'......have you ever been to Baghdad?

Apart from the school pedo teacher there has been nothing of late. 'MAN LOOSE WITH HAMMER AND BLOWTORCH'
I love the use of the word 'LOOSE' in that headline. Where exactly was he LOOSE from, his cage?

Haha, those shirts are brilliant. If I was buying one, and I'm now seriously considering it, I would opt for the 'Gary Glitter Is My Babysitter' one, controversial yet funny. Although the Jospeh Fritzl 'Practical Joke World Champion' shirt is also brilliant. Both maybe?



posted on Jan, 27 2010 @ 03:02 PM
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reply to post by LiveForever8
 


from: DarkCyrus
sent: 26/1/10 at 10:01 PM
Thank you, I'm alive and well. And I'm still here.



I was genuinely worried for a while there.. I should set up a suicide watch for ATS members.

Yea, he only got any that night because he needed to celebrate the recovery of his winky! It is his own fault sometimes though. If he wasnt so stuck up in Castaway he could have discovered the beautiful, loving relationship between a man and his volleyball.
I will NEVER understand why Leonardo cheats on the french girl. :shk:

'Sort of know'..

Of course you need photographic evidence for such wild claims, it is Rolf Harris we're talking about here.. and lets not forget that you still have provided no evidence of this alleged 2nd meeting with Dr Karl, so I can only assume that you are telling lies in order to appear well connected with the world of showbusiness!

Bromborough looks WILD. At least there's more women there then men though, so to every man theres 1 woman AND a foot, or a hand. Happy days!
Just looked on Mansfield's page, its amazing.. although Im 99.9% sure we dont have a museum.
I really like this quote from it:



D. H. Lawrence, in Lady Chatterley's Lover, described Mansfield as "that once romantic now utterly disheartening colliery town".


Right, thats D.H. Lawrence on my hit list!

Im currently leaning more towards the Joseph Fritzl tshirt... Have you noticed that you can buy the 'Gary Glitters my babysitter' tshirt for babies as well?



posted on Jan, 27 2010 @ 05:28 PM
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reply to post by Bluebelle
 





from: DarkCyrus
sent: 26/1/10 at 10:01 PM
Thank you, I'm alive and well. And I'm still here.




That would be a administrative nightmare! I reckon about 98% of ATS are suicidal. One quick look in the 2012 forum proves that.

Yer, that volleyball was definitely 'the one that got away' so to speak, Wilsoooooooooooooooon! He has to cheat on her cos that horrible woman knows he told the potheads about the map. Well he doesn't have to I suppose, I wouldn't have of course......

Yes 'sort of know', I know his name and have spoken to him a few times but I wouldn't say we've ever shared a bed or anything drastic like that! Look what ATS has done to you, turned you into a dis-trusting pessimist
You'll be starting your own 'Humans are a disease on this disgusting planet' thread next. I will find those pictures for you, hopefully they will bring you to trust people again.

Haha, not quite happy days, the vast majority of those females are on the brink of death. I was hoping this ice cold winter would kill a few of them off but if anything they have come back stronger!

I've always liked D.H. Lawrence, very, very wise man
I couldn't help notice some of the places Mansfield is twinned with. Stryj which doesn't seem to actually exist and Heiligenhaus which is, well, Wikipedia says it all really. To make matters worse you share Heiligenhaus with Basildon


I say, buy the Fritzl one for yourself and buy the baby version of GG's one and save it for when you have your own little sprog. It's best they learn early about legends such as GG



posted on Jan, 27 2010 @ 07:22 PM
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reply to post by LiveForever8
 


Hmm, Id say its more like 15% suicidal, 43% too insane to function - those are the one's who go off on fairy hunting missions and end up getting lost & dying at the bottom of their garden. 41.5% overly paranoid - these people will end up either getting arrested for murdering their postman because they believe he is the antichrist, or just die of starvation because they're too paranoid to leave the house.
And then there's the 0.5% left who are completely normal.. and thats me.


Thats actually one of the things that bugs me about that film. He didnt have to tell the truth! He could have just claimed that the man who died showed them the map and not him.



'Humans are a disease on this disgusting planet'

:bash:
Single most annoying sentence in the world. Im guessing you've seen those threads floating round recently related to that?
Makes me want to stab myself in the eye. Cant stand people putting their extreme view of it across and bleating on about it for hours on end... if you feel so strongly about it then get off the internet and do your bit!

On the brink off death? Of what, AIDS?


I dont understand why we have twin towns.. Basildon can have Heiligenhaus if they want. However, if anyone tries to muscle in on our imaginary Russian town then there will be hell to pay!!

Also, please consider my latest blog post.. Im considering making a thread on it, I have a feeling Rolf Harris may be behind it all. Geoffrey Leonard wants a secret boys school in the mountains, Rolf Harris wants a zoo that resembles twycross after a few dozen bombs have been dropped on it.

One more thing - www.facebook.com...#/group.php?gid=269512464297&ref=nf
I like this.


[edit on 27/1/10 by Bluebelle]



posted on Jan, 27 2010 @ 09:12 PM
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reply to post by Bluebelle
 


Exqueeze me but where do I fit into this grand scheme of yours?


Very true indeed, I think Leo just fancied a bit of mature cheddar and so overlooked that possibility.

Oh yes I've seen them, got angry because of them and lashed out because of them. Needless to say the neighbours' cat has got another black eye to explain to its owners. So many people on here moaning about how sh*t their lives are and how much they hate people blah blah blah. Here is a wonderful example. Basically some sad act moaning cos girls don't like him, his remedy for this?



and now i got the greatest idea. in work today morning,i was reading a news site,and i readed about how in denmark prostitution is legal,and the women loose.


And...



for god sake i deserve it, its not only the relaxing of the beach and prostitutes,ill try to visit a local mason lounge,and by some enchanted items from the bazaar.


As mad as a basket full of badgers.

Obviously AIDS! What else would a community of elderly pensioners die of?
Not just your run of the mill AIDS either, but Bad AIDS.

I can't see anyone trying to be honest, it's as elusive as McDonaldland apparently.

That 'Zoo' is monstrous on an enormous scale and yet it has swiftly become my favourite zoo in the world!



'Would it be nice not to step on the grass?' - I dont know, would it?


What a brilliant way of putting it! If you tell someone not to do something, what do they go and do? Exactly. This way of putting it just bamboozles any prospective grass steppers and forces them to ask a deep and meaning full question. Another win for Chinese philosophy




Please abide by the rules above.
Otherwise, the breaching tourist should be responsible for all consequences.


I don't like the vagueness of that part. Over here, a small fine perhaps. Over there, execution by rabid wolves.

What a lovely list. I used to own a t-shirt that said 'If it doesn't give me Cancer I ain't interested' on it. My personal favourites are: BEING A BLACK PERSON, BLOWJOBS, BUBBLE BATH, FLIP FLOPS, LARGE HEADS.

What if your a flip flop wearing black person with a large head getting a blow job in a bubble bath?
Asking for trouble really aren't you.



posted on Jan, 28 2010 @ 11:58 AM
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reply to post by LiveForever8
 


Hmm, well today for the 3rd time in about 8 months Ive managed to put my phone in the cutlery draw for no apparant reason, had no recollection of doing it and only realised where it was when my phone started ringing/beeping... so I think that cements my place in the 43% of people who are too insane to function, so you can take over my place in the 0.5% of normal people if you like?





all my life i wanted a nice girl,i didnt even want sex so much,i EVEN skipped a sex once couse i wanted a girl to be my girlfriend,not just drunken sex night. and i learned my lesson. now its time to show them the middle fingers.



I have NO idea why girls arent falling over themselves to become this guys girlfriend!
I enjoyed the dancing flea, but clearly it is nothing in comparison to 'enchanted items' in the bazaar, and the 'loose' women of denmark.


I really enjoy the latest post on this thread:


Originally posted by russ212
reply to post by usereightthousand
 


I don't understand, why don't you people that want humans to die just go ahead and kill yourselves. It would make much more room for animals. And I know I would be happier.


I like this guy.


I spent a good 5 minutes pondering over the possible answer to that question.. came up with nothing! So yes if anything they've created a good distraction for any evil tourists wishing to trample all over the grass.

Best thing is though these insane/generally odd translations arent even a rare occurance over there... my friend has literally about 30/40 photos just of these amazing signs. I'll probably add them to that blog entry later, they seriously need to employ a decent chinese-english translator over there.

Well if your unfortunate enough to be all those things then you've probably got approximately 3 minutes left until you get cancer and die. And thats being optimistic.
I particularly liked candle-lit dinners & broken hearts. If I get taken for a candle-lit dinner anytime soon I will most definately bring the cancer thing up mid-dinner.

And next time one of my friends breaks up with someone I'll be telling them to cheer up, otherwise they'll get cancer!

Oh and best story Ive seen on the sun website to date - 'I fear my sis SuBo will be assassinated like Lennon'
Susan Boyle and John Lennon - definately the same.



posted on Jan, 28 2010 @ 03:27 PM
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reply to post by Bluebelle
 


Haha, well I would gladly take your place although I must confess that I too have fallen victim to such mind numbing stupidity. I spent about 2 freakin' hours a couple of months ago looking for the TV remote only to discover it in the fridge!


Not even Cilla could find that guy a woman, well, at least without paying first. I thought the dancing flea would cheer him up somewhat, obviously I failed, probably because he looks more like Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo than a flea. Still, I'd like to see him try and buy some dancing faeces from this magical bazaar of his


russ212 - couldn't have said it better myself.

Haha, yes please do add them, if they're anything like that one they should be great. You would think that a country with, what is it - 50 billion people I think, would have at least one decent translator
Jackie Chan is missing a trick, it could be a decent little side line of work, although I don't understand half of what he says most of the time. I just think he adorable.

What a wonderful conversation starter that would be. "You do realise that by bringing me here you've probably given me cancer don't you? Thanks."



And next time one of my friends breaks up with someone I'll be telling them to cheer up, otherwise they'll get cancer!




Haha, how ridiculous!


I think he got more of a scare than I did because he ran off.


I don't blame him!


She MOONWALKED across the London studios before spinning around for the famous crotch grab. A witness said: "It was hilarious. She's more agile than she looks.




Going from that she is more likely to die from a massive morphine overdose whilst being cradled by her pet chimp. Fingers crossed.

Jezza tomorrow!



posted on Jan, 28 2010 @ 05:52 PM
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reply to post by LiveForever8
 


Haha, yes!! Ive done that before, except it was the phone charger that went in the fridge.


Dont be mean, Id go out with him! Well, as long as he bought me a magic lamp and a flying carpet from this bazaar first. I think the main problem with the flea was that it didnt appear to have a gender, if it was female he would have loved it!

I love when people just turn up in threads and start saying exacty what everyone else is thinking but dont say out of politeness.


Blogspot is being a little bitch tonight, so Ive uploaded them on here for safekeeping - China/Twylight Zone
Ive lost interest in the signs slightly so theres some other pics that I found highly amusing from his china fb albums!

It would be amazing, I love making awkward situations even worse.

Plus, what with valentines day coming up it would be an original gift to give. Teddy bears and flowers are out, cancer is in!
Actually that reminds me of this amazing game on msn called 'charming holly valance'. You have to basically chat her up, when me and my friend discovered it we of course spent a good hour just saying absolutely vile things to her... But, after we did it properly and got to the end it shows a picture of her wearing a tshirt saying 'Hollys loves (your name)'. So when we played again we put the name as 'cancer'. I had actual tears of joy seeing her wearing a tshirt that said 'Holly loves cancer'.


Susan Boyle is a terrible human being, I hope someone does bump her off, but they cant actually compare her to John Lennon! The only celebrities that can be compared in anyway to him are Jedward.




Jezza tomorrow!


I massively dislike this.



posted on Jan, 28 2010 @ 07:31 PM
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reply to post by Bluebelle
 


Haha, I thought the TV remote was bad but a phone charger is just mental! You raised the bar, well done


Oh, you'll go out with him will you. I'll just give him a quick u2u and see what he thinks to this development. I think you might live to regret those words too as it seems he might well have a magic lamp and flying carpet......



thank you man,but its like im a paladin or something


Pretty sure he meant Aladin there, so...well done, you've pulled!

The link you provided turned out to be a dead end, merely taking me to my profile page. Luckily for me I used my infinite intelligence and guile to locate said pictures
They are truly outstanding!

I want to go on this slide more than ANYTHING - but what those poor unsuspecting children don't know is that slide goes direct to Gary Glitters underground lair.

the cutest little china man in the world! - Cute, yes. As long as he isn't saluting his first dump of the day which resides in that bowl/hat thing he's holding.

- "Yer I'm holding a bag full of chicken heads, what of it?"

I wanna go to China now, it's like a none stop comedy show


Making awful situations even worse is kind of what I do, it's my calling I reckon. It actually makes me sad when somebody misses that oppertunity to stick the knife in and twist it. Finding that split second moment of silence during a cringe worthy episode and filling it with verbal tactlessness is a fine art. We are artists you and I, destined to be ignored by history


The effort and thought that went into that is commendable, well done
I just can't believe I have never heard of this game. The amount of hours I wasted doing work when I should have been forcing Holly Valance to wear a shirt proclaiming she loves anal, what a wasted youth


What I don't understand about Boyle is that she's actually a sh*t singer. If she wasn't so ghastly looking she would never have gotten past the first stage! Sympathy vote methinks? Your right only Jedward come close.

Jealous
What's going to get your goat even more is that we have 2 extra spaces going to waste. Can you believe that!?



posted on Jan, 29 2010 @ 10:00 AM
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Pet hate for today - Pretentious media students who think talking about obscure 1970's french films makes them look good.



reply to post by LiveForever8
 


Thankyou, I do try.

As for the TV remote, that always manages to run away.. its got to the point where I lose it and automatically start searching for it in random places like in the bathroom etc, when it was just next to me the whole time. I think Im going senile!

Haha thankyou, make sure you mention that I like going on romantic trips to denmark.


Or a one way trip to Geoffreys special school

I think the possibility of Gary G waiting at the bottom of the slide with a net would just make it more fun!

Are you by any chance familiar with the awkward turtle?
I get so much enjoyment from awkward situations, this is my absolute favourite one that happened last year:
My friend had to go to the doctors so I went with her, I sat in the waiting room while she was having her appointment.. and this happened to be the most rammed/silent/awkward waiting room in the world. So when my friend came out I asked what the doctor said and she replied 'Im dying.. Ive got 3 days to live.'
Literally everyone heard her say it, the looks on their faces were priceless.


Aha, well done sherlock

Im at a complete loss as to why ATS randomly decides to cut links off half way, its mildly irrational.

Yea I never thought she was any good either! I remember watching it on youtube expecting to be absolutely blown away after it had been in all the papers... and I only ended up watching half of it because it was so dull & boring. The only good thing to come out of it is the amusing break downs she keeps having, I enjoy reading about those.
However I am dreading the day where she'll be in the newspaper giving her account of the night she finally lost her virginity. Shudder.




we have 2 extra spaces going to waste.


Im disgusted, and have completely lost faith in humanity. :shk:

I am extremely jealous, and I expect a minute by minute account of what happened when you return!


[edit on 29/1/10 by Bluebelle]



posted on Jan, 29 2010 @ 12:22 PM
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Originally posted by Chonx
Well this is very specific and you don't play left 4 dead you won't know what I mean but I HATE RAGE QUITTERS!! they should have the game taken away from them and be made to sit quietly for a while and think about what they've done!

(for the enlightenment of those not fortunate enough to own left 4 dead or L4D2, A rage quit is the act of leaving a game in progress midway through a game because one's team is losing and one cannot take it)

I want a little zombie emoticon thingy but there isn't one...

:shk: (best I could do)


YES YES YES YES YES!!!

YES AGAIN!

I see this in Call of Duty and LFD

One game I play (MMO Tank Game) has mods and if you rage quit a couple times they ban you from their servers

I thing if you rage quit it should count as a loss. The problem then comes what happens if the person simply disconnected?

-Kyo



posted on Jan, 29 2010 @ 12:38 PM
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reply to post by LiveForever8
 


So for fun I looked up Katie Price...I know nothing of her personality but MAN is she ugly

-Kyo



posted on Jan, 30 2010 @ 08:58 AM
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My pet hate for the day......bouncers. How to be a bouncer: 1) Be an a**hole. 2) Stand near a door.


reply to post by Bluebelle
 


Haha, your not the only one. Even worse than that is the...
"Oh no, where is my phone!?"
"Its in your hand."

For thirty seconds yesterday I actually patted my pockets in panic thinking I had lost my phone whilst talking to a friend on said 'lost' phone


I remember seeing it on some program but none of my mates knew what it was, can't say I've ever used it. Haha, doctors waiting rooms are the opportunists dream ticket.

I'm able to restore your faith in humanity as those priceless spaces were filled up with Kyle lovers. Ah, Jeremy Kyle...where do I start?

After waiting outside Granada studios in the FREEZING cold for over an hour we were finally allowed in. We did however see Fizz and Dev from Coronation Street as we waited outside, small mercies and all that.

We were told what the subjects would be and the ground rules were laid down. Subjects:

Geordie Smackhead

This guy was an absolute legend. Crowd pleaser and king of the comical put down. He was basically being stalked by his ex whilst trying to change his life with his new girlfriend. Calling his ex a 'stinker' and saying 'look at you, you look like a raccoon!'


Sh*t Mum

Some young girl who wanted to tell her mum that if she didn't stop drinking she would disown her. The highlight here was the story of how the young girl had gone round to her mums with her boyfriend because her mum had locked herself out of the house. Upon arriving at her mums, the girl found her in the back garden completely naked because she had pissed her pants. The mum was angry that her daughter had brought her boyfriend onto her premises stating 'If I want to walk around my house naked I will, its my house!' Another highlight was when Jeremy asked the audience to raise their hands if they thought the mum was in denial about her drinking, everyone raised their hands. He then says 'You're in denial sweetheart, everyone agrees, you're in denial!' To which she retorted 'No I'm not'......briliant


It Smelled Of Sex

Some man who was accusing his wife of cheating on him. This man was a moron, genuinely retarded. Jezza asks where his wife was at the moment, meaning where she was living. This man says 'Well, she's in there isn't she' pointing to the room next to the stage
He tells of how his wife, who spends all day on the playstation and watching television, had two men in the house at 2 in the morning. He says 'I woke up to the sound of slapping, flesh on flesh. Like sombodys arse being slapped. When I went downstairs I saw two men smoking outside the front door and my wife was lying on the couch. The room smelled like sex' The lie detector results prove she is a 'dirty little lying trollope'...Jeremys words.

There were two more I shall tell of later, I'm massively hungover at the minute. As for The Kyle......speechless. He genuinely doesn't give a sh*t about the people on the show. He walks on stage at the beginning and starts a bit of banter with the audience.
'Anyone been here before then?'
A couple of people say yes.
'Get a job'


He is sooooo skinny and has a MASSIVE head. He looks plain odd.

He'll be ripping into someone in the audience and mid sentence he'll turn to camera, do his piece effortlessly, then just turn back and continue his rant. It was so surreal. Graham was there and there abouts but never actually got directly involved. Jezza informed us that Graham had recently become godfather to his latest kid, yes... Graham is literally The Godfather.

Did I mention he sat next to me? Yer, that's right
I also had the camera repeatedly shoved into my face so I think it's safe to say I'll be on tele


There is so much more but at the moment my head isn't functioning because of post Kyle celebrations. Said celebrations included a 2 hour drunken arguement on the train home about the differences between trains, buses and trams whilst drinking straight from bottles of wine. It's fair to say we weren't the most popular people in our carriage


I'll finish with what Jezza's last words were as he minced out of the studio (which was absolutely tiny by the way)......

"Live everyday like it is your last because one day, you'll be right."


[edit on 05/08/2009 by LiveForever8]



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