So I'm Ready To Meet Someone New..

I'm probably inviting all sorts of trouble by starting this thread, haha.

My stomach has finally settled from the last roller coaster ride I was on so I'm ready to purchase a new ticket and line up again. However, I need a little advice on where to start.

First of all, every single one of my previous boyfriends were "random encounters". I either met them through a friend of a friend (typical scenario) or happened to bump into a guy I hadn't seen for several years. For this reason, I've never actively searched for a new partner. I always figured that I'd meet someone when the time was right.

I've read many suggestions from previous threads on the same topic. Dating websites are out of the question! I'm not the type of girl you see in a club or bar either. Then again, I'd never enter a relationship (other than friendship) with someone I met at that kind of place anyway! My hobbies aren't extensive enough to join a "common interest" social group. On top of that, I live in a relatively small city. Everyone knows everyone - literally. And if they don't know you, they know somebody who does.

Those of you who live in Australia will understand that younger people don't really "date" here. I'd barely known any of my previous boyfriends for a week before we decided to become an item, geez.

Help out a fellow ATS/BTS member? *grins*

reply to post by Pandapple


Here i am baby! Oh wait....you're in Australia.

Hehehe only kidding.

Well you never know what's around the corner in life. I am sure there is someone out there who is right for you. Just don't give up hope that you'll find someone new and don't rule any possibilities out.

Apologies that i just came out with the typical cliched rubbish.

I posted as i remember reading your other thread, Learning the Hard Way.



[edit on 20/12/09 by Kram09]

Relationships seem to find you, so you just might want to see what luck has in store...rather than take an active interest in "the game".... A few trips to neighboring towns may open up the field a little bit though....

Gazrok is right, travel. If your town is so small you know all the prospects there than the 1980's way of meeting in the supermarket or at the post office wouldnt really be an option. If your not into the bar scene, and what have you, do what you are interested in whatever it is and strike up conversations with people partacking in whatever it is.
For me thats the number one thing just striking up a conversation with someone. Hello is my go to opener and it works fine. Most importantly if you are looking to meet someone go to groups of people, it will take alot of courage but be that wondering soul that can make friends with anyone they see. You'll meet so many people that way, wont gurantee you'll find Mr Right, but if 6 degrees shows us anything its that someone out there may know him. You just gotta get on his "scent" (gross choice of words replace "scent" with "trail".)

What's wrong with dating sites?

I met my true love over 5 years ago and we are very happy together.

I got tired of the bar scene and had been married 4 times already so I felt safe on a dating site.

We talked for 6 months before we met. We both had voice and a cam so we saw and talked every night.

I finally met him in a public place and we dated a few months
and finally realized we could not live without each other so he moved in with me.

I retired and talked him into doing the same. We feel we are meant to be together and are both very happy.

If you are ready to find a girlfriend you will need to take some positive action. Either get out and socialize or get on a dating site. I don't recommend bar hopping because that's where I met all my husbands.

Good luck. Hope you find what you are looking for.

Don't search for relationship. Relationships will search for you, if you are wise and lovable. Try to behave softly and gently with others. Smile whenever you meet any person. Smile will speak more than the words could.

According to me there are three basic qualities for making a good relationship. They are
1. Smile
2. Kind & gentle heart
3. Not expecting anything from the other except love

I hope you will get a nice and charming boyfriend.


[edit on 28-2-2010 by mohan4u25]

Sad truth of life: Any woman on earth can at least get SOME man to fall in love with her. He may not be an ideal specimin, but at least he will be a living, breathing man.

Unfortuantely, not every man on earth can get a woman to fall in love with him.

That's just the way it is. So simply by being female you've already upped your chances of romantic success considerably. Just keep your standards realistic.

Originally posted by silent thunder
Sad truth of life: Any woman on earth can at least get SOME man to fall in love with her. He may not be an ideal specimin, but at least he will be a living, breathing man.

Well in that case she can just go visit the local coma ward...

Unfortuantely, not every man on earth can get a woman to fall in love with him.

That's just the way it is. So simply by being female you've already upped your chances of romantic success considerably.

Just keep your standards realistic.

I do not think you are talking about getting a man to fall in love with a woman but getting him to have sex. Yes I agree most women can find a man willing to have sex with her she won't have to look very far. Women are generally more discriminatory when it comes to choosing sexual partners as subconciously they are looking for the ideal genetic specimen to create a baby with not a dud who will disapear after doing up his pants leaving hercarrying the baby.

"Falling in love" is a different subject as it includes mating and pair bonding which makes the foundation of a protected and provided for family unit. You cannot fall in love with just anybody.

[edit on 28-2-2010 by riley]

I feel for you. I feel like ive just read my situation on your OP. All i can really say is good luck, and when you find that relationship...give a girl some advice

i find it hard to meet people at the best of times, most nice guys I have met have always wanted something they can't have and use us nice gals as a stepping stone to the next

reply to post by jumpingbeanz


..because they weren't nice guys just actors.

just look into his eyes^^ you girls are way better at sensing our desires. you can sense what i want just from making eye contact,looking at my body language,its not that hard. just dont fall for the nice guy/bad guy.
i dont thinks its so hard to find a nice funny creative guy,who can give you a better present then "flowers"
just keep searching

The universe creates your reality. If you "want" something, the universe will create just that "Want'.

When you tell the universe you " have" something, ... it makes it true. so you will gain it. this is the idea behind faith.

This is why people can never find a mate but once they do it seems like all of the sudden tons of girls are interested in them. It's not because their taken, ... its because their mental outlook has changed.

so let me tell you this...... stop searching. Want creates want. take time to work on yourself and become completely happy with who you are, .... and when your ready, it will happen.

Hi there!
I totally understand what you are saying -
how frustrating it is to feel like choices or circumstances are limited by where you are from or how you've met someone in the past.
But don't worry, aussie boys are the best - although sometimes they seem like they are pretty slow off the ground lol.
I wish you the best of luck finding that special person, it may take time but I'm a big believer in quality not quantity myself, and these things can take a while.

Wag x

I SAY TRY SOMETHING NEWWW.
MEET A GUY AT A CLUB..
NOT ALL OF THEM ARE BAD. ( IVE MET ACOUPLE NICE GUYS AT CLUBS AND SUCH )
UHMMM .. AND IF U DNT WANNA THEN DONT.. JUS WAIT FOR THE RIGHT GUY TO COME AT THE RIGHT TIMEE.