Am I an empath? How extensive are my abilities?

At 16, even since i was 3 or 4, I've always felt "different" than my peers. As a result I have struggled socially. I have had constant ups and downs. The last few months have been a spiritual awakening for me, as I try to find what makes me different. One thing that makes me different is that I have had a strong passion for the supernatural, even at a young age. I'm also an avid daydreamer.

I've had...odd things happen to me. For example, I often know what people are going to say before they say it. I also can tell people's deep inner emotions even if they try to hide it. As long as the person is within sight, I can tell their feelings by looking at them for a moment and putting myself in their shoes (metaphorically of course). I can also tell when someone is lying or not telling the whole truth.

 I only "feel" people I focus on, but all people influence me in a way. At the end of a school day I always find myself with a headache, and it feels like me head is about to explode with pressure. When I get home, I usually have to have atleast 30 minutes of "wind-down time" to clear my head. I stay away from social situations because they make my moods erratic and my head "buzz". This is also the case when it is bust at the local grocery store I work at. The store was packed today and I had a huge migrane until it died down. My vision was also off with my depth perception. Ironically, the migrane centered on my forehead, right where the "third eye" is supposed to be. A physical symptom of feeling emotions is that I get feelings in my gut. Kind of like "butterflies".

I have a hard time getting to sleep at night and usually try to meditate beforehand. I have sleep apnea also, with many lucid dreams, and often get 9-10 hours of sleep just to feel well rested.

Recently a kid died in a car crash at school. I didn't know him, but all the sad emotions caused me to become very depressed over almost anything.

I think I might be an empath. It certainly makes sense. I mean, I always have people tell me I'm kind and compassionate I am. Recently, I took steps to shield myself, which has been working, except it is still hard to be around negative people in close proximity for an extended period of time (I.e. Class). And it takes much concentration to block a few people, so many people still get through. The hardest part is with negative adults. In society, adults are almost always more "powerful" politically than kids. In other words, kids and teens are powerless against adults. As much as I try to make their negative energy bounce off me, it easily pierces my shield because I am nervous of getting in trouble with them.

Also, I find either people think I'm the sweetest guy ever, or absolutley hate me, for no apparent reason or over something stupid. I find people coming up to me to let me know their problems. The weird thing is my mom says the same thing. She jokes that she is the therapist of her office.

I love nature and animals. My Australian shepard & Chesapeake bay mix ADORES me, as I do her. She comes and curls up next to me, but when I look into her eyes, I see a deep and sophisticated, but pure living thing. I'm not sure if we have a type of telepathic communication, but when I tell her something and look into her eyes, she seems like she understands. Maybe not my words, but what I am talking about. Ex.If I say "I have to go", she looks at me disappointed but submissevly and let's me get up and leave. Dogs I don't even know often try to run up to me from their leashes or yard. Not in an angry way, but an excited way.

I also have clairvoyant dreams. I remembered them more as a kid, but they usually come true. They started out as small things (ex. Doing laundry) that came true, but now they seem to be bigger things (ex. Depression, a death, fired from job). The problem is, I usually have these clairvoyant dreams in the middle of the night. The details are faded by morning, and I can't think clearly enough to write it down in the middle of the night because I sleep like a rock. How can I remember these dreams better? It is very disappointing to wake up and remember that I was revealed "a great secret" but not remember what it is.

Do you think I might be an empath? Also, how could I work on extending my abilities to calm someone else? I  don't even think about influencing emotions, I just do it subconsciously, but how could I do it consciously? 

S & F, i will take a while to understand your post, but what i can tell you is that i empathize with your current position..... Nice first post btw.

Hi & Welcome to ATS!

Originally posted by mossme89
At 16, even since i was 3 or 4, I've always felt "different" than my peers.

At some point in our lives, everyone feels 'different' in some way. That's because we all are. I have also found that people who internalize many of their thoughts/emotions often feel 'different' or separate too. This is simply an effect of internalization. It creates a natural 'barrier'.

One thing that makes me different is that I have had a strong passion for the supernatural, even at a young age. I'm also an avid daydreamer.

Sounds completely normal to me.. but hey.. this is ATS right

I also can tell people's deep inner emotions even if they try to hide it.

Body language or non verbal communication is often much stronger than verbal. This is something we start to hone as babies.

Recently a kid died in a car crash at school. I didn't know him, but all the sad emotions caused me to become very depressed over almost anything.

It's natural to feel empathy or sadness for someone who has lost their life. Most of us do... except for the axe wielding maniacs of course

Your depression is obviously going to magnify this sadness amongst many other things.

I think I might be an empath. It certainly makes sense. I mean, I always have people tell me I'm kind and compassionate I am.

Personally I think you're just a normal person who probably ruminates a bit too much. Let it go, relax a bit and have a good laugh!

IRM

reply to post by mossme89


Hi mossme89. Yes, it certainly appears as though you have some empathic abilities.

I am in the business of psychology, and sometimes am called upon to make assessments of people very quickly. There are situations in which this can be urgent, and decisions, at least temporary ones, must be made very quickly. Consequently, I have deliberately expanded my empathic abilities. I worked on it. I made it happen. It has served me well.

Yours seems to have developed on it's own, or you inherited it. This is something you can build on and use, or let die if you wish.

I have read of people who feel the emotion's of others so strongly, they have a difficult time going into crowed places. They feel so bombarded with emotions they become uncomfortable and have to leave.

I personally never experience anything like that. It is a tool I use by focusing on someone, usually in a one-on-one setting, or sometimes must do so in a chaotic situation. I can call it up. Sometimes a person's feelings, if they are very intense, will "jump out at me", and I don't care for that. I'd rather be in control. But when this happens the person is experiencing very intense feelings, and is usually psychotic, I've come to see. When it happens with a person who is very actively having a psychotic break, it makes me very, very uncomfortable, and I will generally leave the room a couple of minutes to "break the connection". I personally can avoid the "reconnect" (usually, not always) by not making eye contact with them again. It's the eye contact that does it for me.

But this will be what you make of it. I don't consider it "paranormal", or anything of that nature. It is what it is, and can be helpful in helping others.

If the ability doesn't get out of control, and you don't come to hate it, you might want to consider going into one of the helping professions. It gives you a slight edge, but of course other acquired tools through study and experience must be engaged as well.

reply to post by mossme89


I have to say i both respect and appreciate this very deep post by you, i believe it takes a lot of courage to post something so heart felt.

I would like to be as honest as i can with my response. Firstly, i do need to say that my knee jerk reply would be this. Myself included, people can just be good readers of others, i know when people around me are sad, or angry or something is playing on there mind, like you, a lot of people come to me for advice. Some people like you, some people do not like you, that's the way of the world my friend.

However, after taking the time to read and understand what you have said, everything seems to affect you in a very esoteric way. The headaches, the migraines, having to wind down afterwards and then meditate before sleeping.

You clearly are a very emotional, and sensitive person, but sometimes the key is learning to control that emotion.

If i may, i would like to ask you a question. Do you find that certain events which take place in your life, for example, an argument, or a confrontation, do you tend to replay these scenarios in your head afterwards? Do you think about what you could have done differently and dwell on these events? If so, do they also cause headaches, or make you feel down?

A bit of personal advice i could give you in respect to your dreams. For a long time now i have become fascinated with the potential of the mind while dreaming. Dream recall had always been a problem for me, and i found the best solution was this, after waking up i would lay in my bed replaying the event, thinking about the dream as it is fresh in my mind, and after a few minutes of replaying this dream i would write it down in a journal underneath my pillow.

After a while, remembering my dreams became easier, i no longer have to write them down, and my dreams are becoming very real, and extremely clear, i've been having some very strange experiences, but that's not something to talk about here.

You're clearly at a young age, aswell as these empathetic thoughts, you've probably got a lot on your mind and staying positive can help. Even when you speak, speak in a positive tone, think in a positive manner, i hope you manage to stay on top of things, and look forward to how these thoughts develop.



[edit on 6-12-2009 by Skyco]

Your statements are very intelligent, well thought out, seemingly sincere and mature. I applaud you for what appears to be a lot of searching within yourself and research on the subjects you've mentioned. This level of maturity is not seen very often in a 16 year old...

I especially applaud the fact that you seek to utilize your gifts in helping others...

Also, how could I work on extending my abilities to calm someone else? I don't even think about influencing emotions, I just do it subconsciously, but how could I do it consciously?

You have a beautiful head on your shoulders and a wonderful gift... I wish I had the knowledge of these things to help you but can only give you encouragement. Thank you and please don't get discouraged... the world needs more people like you.

Nice first thread.

You remind me enough of me that you must be an empath.
I have a few ideas for you.
Write down whatever comes to mind when you wake up first thing in the morning. It helps dream recall and it stimulates creativity.
And the next idea might be a bit out there; but all my ideas are, anyway

People tell you their problems , right? They tell you things they wouldn't tell anyone else and I theorize it's because they can sense (subconsciously I would say) that you are an empath much in the same way people do that with me.
Want to cut down on people hating you?
Being an empath 101 ; stop listening to their problems.
I'm telling you it works. Don't be an a@#hole with people , but stop listening as if you were their therapist.
I began telling close friends recently that their negative stories are constant within our conversations because of my ability to listen to them. I told them to a certain extent that it's unfair. I don't do that to them.
And they stopped doing it.
Also think about this. Problems socially to a certain extent? Indeed, because once these people who have pored their hearts out to you while in your presence/energy leave you and go back to their lives they often panic and ask themselves "why in the world did I just tell him that?"
They are often so feaked out about it that they suddenly treat you differently than before; a bit more standoffish.
Am I right?
I know I am. It's a lot to process. But I'm certain that being an empath is a gift once you learn to control your mind. Good luck
Flag for you

You are what you believe yourself to be.

reply to post by Aoxoa


that was a comment that needs to be put on the super troll poster board. As for the OP welcome to my world. It took a year and a half to prove my abilities with my college friends that i am what i am. My high school friends still think i am crazy. Their loss i guess.

It takes time. When i was your age, the same issues were mine. Keep searching for answers and i hope you find um. I still havent but it doesnt mean that i will stop. I dont have that luxury. Hone the skills you have and develop new ones. You would be surprised what you may be capable of.

If u want help, to learn this things and evolve, i could help.
If you´re interested, first read my previous posts, by searching.
If you have questions, ask.


Peace

reply to post by mossme89


Your path is your path. Do not judge yourself against others, and you may find some truths from within yourself.

There are plenty of books out there to help in your journey, but if you do not like a book, do not read it. When you get a book, feel it and what you feel within, whether you should read it or not. Learn to trust yourself.

Plus try in life to stay away from drugs, people say they enhance, but i do not think so. Truth of what you asked is within you, its your journey. Do not turn to gurus and all others, as we all live in our own worlds. The truth you are seeking is within you.

I also would not go around talking about this stuff too much in the world, as many others, are too busy to notice and understand what you talking about.



[edit on 12/6/2009 by andy1033]

i agree with andy. Dont talk about it much, but only because there are those who might take interest in it for reasons not beneficial to you... if understand my meaning. And some drugs retard progress rather than elevate. But to be safe, avoid all that you can.

Originally posted by scubagravy
S & F, i will take a while to understand your post, but what i can tell you is that i empathize with your current position..... Nice first post btw.

thank you. I actually typed it up on my phone in the course of two days, as ideas came to me

I didn't want my first thread to be like "Hey!! When are the aliens invading!?" lol

Originally posted by ladyinwaiting
reply to post by mossme89

 

Yours seems to have developed on it's own, or you inherited it. This is something you can build on and use, or let die if you wish.

My guess is that i inherited this from my mother. She is affected in the same way as me, and avoids busy public places (ex. stores during key business hours). She also has people she doesn't really know at work coming up and spilling out their problems to her.

I have read of people who feel the emotion's of others so strongly, they have a difficult time going into crowed places. They feel so bombarded with emotions they become uncomfortable and have to leave.

with me, this has been an issue. I feel bombarded by everything, and overwhelmed with the setting and anxiety. I don't HAVE to leave, but it is to much relief.

I personally never experience anything like that. It is a tool I use by focusing on someone, usually in a one-on-one setting, or sometimes must do so in a chaotic situation. I can call it up. Sometimes a person's feelings, if they are very intense, will "jump out at me", and I don't care for that. I'd rather be in control. But when this happens the person is experiencing very intense feelings, and is usually psychotic, I've come to see. When it happens with a person who is very actively having a psychotic break, it makes me very, very uncomfortable, and I will generally leave the room a couple of minutes to "break the connection". I personally can avoid the "reconnect" (usually, not always) by not making eye contact with them again. It's the eye contact that does it for me.

But this will be what you make of it. I don't consider it "paranormal", or anything of that nature. It is what it is, and can be helpful in helping others.

If the ability doesn't get out of control, and you don't come to hate it, you might want to consider going into one of the helping professions. It gives you a slight edge, but of course other acquired tools through study and experience must be engaged as well.

Possibly. I've always thought i had a great career in computers ahead of me, but maybe i could use this when the oppurtunity comes.

On a side note, i practiced honing in on people's emotions yesterday. Maybe a lot of it is body language, but i almost always found i could figure out someones situation almost immediatley.

Ex. They are frustrated and in a hurry; they are anxious to get out of the store before the snow; depressed over something that happened in the family; lonely, etc.

We are all on different scales of various skills and abilities. But everyone has the same human value whether they are a plumber or a social worker or a cleaner or the CEO of a large corporation.
As for empathy, some people are more 'empathic' than others. Please don't label yourself as 'an empath' because it comes across as egotistical. You are not unique. You are not any more special than any one else.
Some of us are actually pretty good at reading situations and people. But we don't go around saying OMG, I'm AN EMPATH.
The key to success - for yourself and others - is just to live life according to your own inclinations and abilities.





[edit on 6-12-2009 by unicorn1]

[edit on 6-12-2009 by unicorn1]

reply to post by mossme89


so you are saying you can 'see' their emotions. I say see as there is no words in english to describe the experience. Sure our mirror neurons in our brain fire, allowing us to 'experience' their emotions, but that does not allow us to discern their happening. It cant be the whole story. So i say 'see' as that is how i feel when i talk to someone for the first time and i am already predicting their actions and thoughts.

reply to post by unicorn1


that statement is a bit misguided because if Tesla, Einstien, Sun Tsu, or Duke Ellington called themselves special at 16 you would have to say that they too were not special. They obviously were but no one knew they were... yet. They had to prove themselves jsut like CEO's but they did it.

Originally posted by Skyco
reply to post by mossme89

 

I have to say i both respect and appreciate this very deep post by you, i believe it takes a lot of courage to post something so heart felt.

I would like to be as honest as i can with my response. Firstly, i do need to say that my knee jerk reply would be this. Myself included, people can just be good readers of others, i know when people around me are sad, or angry or something is playing on there mind, like you, a lot of people come to me for advice. Some people like you, some people do not like you, that's the way of the world my friend.

However, after taking the time to read and understand what you have said, everything seems to affect you in a very esoteric way. The headaches, the migraines, having to wind down afterwards and then meditate before sleeping.

You clearly are a very emotional, and sensitive person, but sometimes the key is learning to control that emotion.

If i may, i would like to ask you a question. Do you find that certain events which take place in your life, for example, an argument, or a confrontation, do you tend to replay these scenarios in your head afterwards? Do you think about what you could have done differently and dwell on these events? If so, do they also cause headaches, or make you feel down?

A bit of personal advice i could give you in respect to your dreams. For a long time now i have become fascinated with the potential of the mind while dreaming. Dream recall had always been a problem for me, and i found the best solution was this, after waking up i would lay in my bed replaying the event, thinking about the dream as it is fresh in my mind, and after a few minutes of replaying this dream i would write it down in a journal underneath my pillow.

After a while, remembering my dreams became easier, i no longer have to write them down, and my dreams are becoming very real, and extremely clear, i've been having some very strange experiences, but that's not something to talk about here.

You're clearly at a young age, aswell as these empathetic thoughts, you've probably got a lot on your mind and staying positive can help. Even when you speak, speak in a positive tone, think in a positive manner, i hope you manage to stay on top of things, and look forward to how these thoughts develop.

[edit on 6-12-2009 by Skyco]

Thank you. I do replay events in my head. Often, even if i plan out what i want to say, it all comes out in a spontaneous, different way. Many situations i feel i could do better. I don't get headaches, but sometimes feel down.

I do remember some of my dreams. One is repetitive and where i have a false awakening and go up to look in my mirror. Often, i get "pulled through" my mirror like it was made of water and into a seperate dimension. i intrepret this as i am reflecting on myself

reply to post by Aoxoa


so how do you expect to pull me back to earth. I'm much farther along than him and i aint stoppin any time soon. Believing is your choice. I dont know if he is or not. But i do know that he can be given the benefit of the doubt until he has been proven to not be one. I could test him but thats not my place to do so.