Exactly What IS The "Gay Agenda"? By a Straight Woman

I am writing this as a heterosexual female, whose limited knowledge of the so-called "Gay Agenda" comes from my friends, (and family members) who are Gay.

Now-I am friends with this Lesbian couple, now in their mid-sixties, who have been together since 1971. They are "Gay Activists". When they were younger they marched in "Gay Pride" Parades. I love these dear friends, as they have always been loyal, caring, and kind to my children & I. They are also very moral ladies.

The activities they have been involved in are: there is a Catholic Church in the Tampa Bay area that gives Communion to Gay Members, and the majority of their Members are Gay. they have fought to change the law(s) so that same-sex couples can be insured like a married couple, (life-partners on each other's health insurance). They have fought for laws concerning same-sex couples being able to make life & death choices about removing a partner from a life-support machine, and donating organs.

*Tris &* Margaret have been careful to take the legal steps that they were allowed to be each other's Power of Atty, and make the life & death decisions for each other. What is so unfair, and this is my opinion too....is without taking these steps, family members, even family members who have not spoken to their "Gay" family members for years, can legally step in & claim ALL of a deceased Gay Relative's belongings, make life & death medical decisions, collect the Gay family members life insurance & claim the estate & inheritance, DESPITE a partner being in the picture.

When a female member of the Tampa Sheriff's Dept. was murdered by Hank Earl Carr in 2001, her life partner could not collect her pension (the partner is on the Tampa force too), nor her insurance, and could not collect her social security. HOWEVER....the State of Florida recognizes "Common Law" marriages, of opposite sex couples living together for 5 years, AND A OPPOSITE SEX COUPLE COULD HAVE COLLECTED THE SAME PENSION, AND INSURANCE BENEFITS. Now, before you say "Well, a couple living together should not have those benefits either", think of this,......the female couple in question here, DID GET MARRIED!!!!! This is not a case of "shacking up". THE STATE OF FLORIDA REFUSED TO RECOGNIZE THE CEREMONY OF MARRIAGE AS LEGAL! Now, that does put thing in a slightly different light, doesn't it?

I have seen not a few remarks lately on other discussion boards, about the "Gay-Agenda". The ONLY Gay Agenda I am aware of is: EQUAL RIGHTS, not "special rights".

Now, individual homosexuals may support pro-choice, sex ed & condom education in public schools, etc.....the same as individual heterosexuals may support the same issues.

Gay people do not have an Agenda to turn teens gay. Guess why? Maybe because they realize being Gay is not contagious. Maybe because they know either you are Gay by birth, or your NOT???

Oh, yeah, Margaret & Tris also try to help Gay friends adopt, or even keep custody of their own children (some dinosaurs still believe that somehow a "Straight" parent, no matter how abusive, or neglective, are the "Better" parent.) Do I have a problem with that? We have so many children who desperately need loving parents, does it REALLY matter if they have two Mommies, or Two Daddies? I mean the example being set would be two loving adults.

So, my point is: it sounds like the Gay agenda is EQUAL RIGHTS.....

Where does the SPECIAL rights come in?

*NOT REAL NAMES

I to have gay friends and if a gay couple moved in next to me I would only be a good neighbor to them. The thing that I don't want to see though is for schools to teach my children that it is ok or normal. The rights that you speak of may just be human rights and I would probably be ok with that if there is some standard. However Gays are not a race they are a choice and many people probably won't see it that way. I think what scares people is what choice will be legalized next?

The gay agenda is equality and acceptance as far as I understand.

Rather than gay people being called gay people, they would like to be people who are gay. Much like a Black Man from 1950 wanted to just be a man who is black.

It will happen with time. A children are exposed more to the fact that homosexuals exist they will grow up with it being a less of a issue than the previous generation until only small pockets of hate groups are left. And eventually even they will die out much as those that hated the british after the American Revolution are now gone.

Personally I have no issue with homosexuals or my children knowing they exist. I have no problem with schools teaching that some time people of the same sex are in love as they do men and women.

If someone think teaching HOW to have gay sex is a good idea i would say that just as bad an idea as teaching them how to have heterosexual sex. Depending on age and the child's curiosity.

People who think there is a gay agenda as in wanting to make other gay are about as worldly as some one who thinks slavery will make a come back.

In the end what counts is love. I don't care if a person is straight or gay, if they are a decent, loving human being then they get my respect. It's as simple as that. Since people are born equal, they should receive equal rights. I have no problem with gay marriages - why shouldn't two people who love each other be able to dedicate themselves to each other for life ?

And its not possible for a gay person to 'turn' another person gay. You are either gay or not. I had a gay friend but there was no way I'd become gay, just as there was no way he'd become straight.
There's no 'Gay agenda' just a wish to be treated fairly.


[Edited on 22-5-2004 by Pisky]

Nice to see some of the views in this thread, Quest and Pisky

Factfinder, you get a

Saying you have gay friends, yet calling homosexuality a choice, and saying that it's abnormal does not balance well.

It's the old "I like Black people, I have some black friends" statement.

I have to chime in and say that the idea that a person "chooses" to be homosexual is counter to all my life experience with the friends and relatives I have that are homosexual. Not one of them has ever given me this faintest hint that there was a decision involved in their sexual preference. Some have know from their earliest recollections; others came to realize it through their own, often traumatic, life experiences. It is painful to watch sometimes as people struggle to sort out their identities, trying to deal with the urges and attractions they feel toward people of the same gender while facing the stigmas and social pressures so often placed on homosexuals. I don't think there is any kind of agenda at work. There is merely a community.

Originally posted by Spectre
I have to chime in and say that the idea that a person "chooses" to be homosexual is counter to all my life experience with the friends and relatives I have that are homosexual.

Yes...but how bout the trend of teens "experimenting"?....I can honestly say more then 1/2 of the female friends I had in High School and College had more then one "gay" experience....yet....none of them consider themselves to be gay nor are gay anymore...I find this puzzling...I think the popularity and "hipness" of this whole gay agenda lead to many of these things...Im not in the least anti-gay....and my HS and College experience where both within the last 10 years....so this is recent...I just dont understand the whole experimenting thing with teenage girls...

Originally posted by BasementAddix

Originally posted by Spectre
I have to chime in and say that the idea that a person "chooses" to be homosexual is counter to all my life experience with the friends and relatives I have that are homosexual.

Yes...but how bout the trend of teens "experimenting"?....I can honestly say more then 1/2 of the female friends I had in High School and College had more then one "gay" experience....yet....none of them consider themselves to be gay nor are gay anymore...I find this puzzling...I think the popularity and "hipness" of this whole gay agenda lead to many of these things...Im not in the least anti-gay....and my HS and College experience where both within the last 10 years....so this is recent...I just dont understand the whole experimenting thing with teenage girls...

You can't blame gays and lesbians because silly straight girls want to impress guys at parties. Pointing to stupid straights acting out and blaming gays makes no sense.

Im not blaming the gay groups...Im blaming the media for over commercializing the entire issue...sorry if I didnt say it in a clearer manner...

If you can prove to me that this is natural and genetic I will be the first to accept it. As I see it for now though it is no different than someone who has sex with their siblings or maybe animals or other objects. maybe they to have had these feeling all their lives so how would you explain that. But you are very wrong to compare these people to any minorities who are kept down only because of the color of their skin.

Originally posted by factfinder38
If you can prove to me that this is natural and genetic I will be the first to accept it. As I see it for now though it is no different than someone who has sex with their siblings or maybe animals or other objects. maybe they to have had these feeling all their lives so how would you explain that. But you are very wrong to compare these people to any minorities who are kept down only because of the color of their skin.

Homosexuality in men:
Many homosexual men have been found to have a reduced sice P3 region of the hypothalimus just as women do. While researchers are attempting to determine if this can be caused by genetics it has been linked to mother experience mental stress of trauma while carrying a male fetus. (This is why so many men born durring and just after major wars tend to be gay compared to peace time)

Additionally, other homosexual men adopt the gay life style based on preference set on thier views of the sexes growing up.

It can be both develepmental and social based.

Homosexuality in women:
To date there is no know physical or genetic marker for homosexuality in women. However study of human culture as well as other primates shows that women tend to be more open to homosexual relationships apparently a method of bonding and staying satisfied while men were out hunting. This also helped prevent women from being unfail to thier male mate by having a sexual relationship with other women of a group or tribe rather than going outside a tribe to find other men.


Old stuff I remember from anthropology and sociology in school. Look it up i'm sure you can find the info.

People don't like change. They also don't like what they don't know. So, gays pushing for equal rights is going to cause more of the flurry of feelings than awe've already seen.
I guess people need to be educated on gayness, in real life. Not the stuff you sometimes see on TV. Most gay folks looks and act nor different than their straight counterparts, IMO.

Personally, I live in a non-common law state. I am straight and have been with my partner since 1992. Why shouldn't I have these rights, too. And, please don't say weel you can just marry. That's not really the issue.
People shouldn't have to do a state-regulated BS ceremony to get partner rights. You.ve been together x number of years, you're entitled. The govt doesn't need to be in our homes on this one. Sorry.

I agree that life partners regardless of sexuality should recieve the benefits they deserve.

What is the deal with gay men being discriminated by the government, I just read a few days ago that sperm donations from gay men are being rejected by a national law in fears of spreading disease. I feel that everyone who donates blood/sperm should be screened for disease and unless gays are more than significantly at risk for disease this law in unmoral. Even if they are, those who have been tested and are clean should be alright.

I also believe homosexuality is a way for nature to balance things out in this chaotic world.


[Edited on 22-5-2004 by jrod]

True, jrod, about the balancing.
We all receive different gifts when we are forming in the womb. These gifts manifest themselves in different ways. Different traits, talents, dispostions, sexual orientations.
There is a purpose to everything created. So, who are we to judge??

thank you for all of the excellent replies

I would point out that even if some people's worst fears "that homosexuality be taught in the schools, as an alternative lifestyle", it would make no difference. Because, either you are attracted to the same-sex, (or not). Yes, many teens experiment with same-sex behavior.

(This was even refered to in the movie "The Color Purple", when Whoopi Goldberg's charactor experiements with the woman her husband is having an affair with).

But, even then, it is experimenting. A "true" homosexual has no more control over their desires, than a heterosexual does.

What happens between two people, in their personal life, is not our buisness. That they ,(same-sex couples) ,are not allowed the same civil rights that we enjoy, IS our buisness.

There was a time, not very long ago, that certain Fundamentalist Christians, and the LDS(Mormon) church taught that "dark" (ie:black) skin was a sign of dis-favor from God. That this was a "sign", a "mark", like the one put on Cain, to mark him as undesirable in God's eyes.

In my lifetime, (I was born in 1961), there were still laws on the books that did not allow African-Americans to marry Angelo's. These were actual LAWS, here in the United States!

Why am I comparing the two examples? Because a person is born with a certain skin-tone. It is a part of their genetic make-up. As is their sexuality.

I have not yet met a homosexual, who WANTED to be born "Gay". It was not a "choice". It was as much a part of them, as the color of their skin.

Another point:

during the early sixties, there were people who simply wanted "Negro's" to stop stirring-up all this trouble, about voter's rights, and who sits where on the bus! Hush-up, and behave.

During my lifetime, I have seen the changes.

Hopefully, during my lifetime, tolerance will be the norm.