posted on Jul, 12 2010 @ 09:12 PM
Well I'm doing yet another round. No need for the sixth rite this time. Each time I do this it gets easier and easier! I'm on day 9 now. It's an
incredible feeling to say the least. I'm not sure if it's simply hormonal balance or what. I have been doing what I see to be as energy work. I feel
my belly fill with fire, then pull it up into my heart, and I usually get such a rush that my sight nearly turns solid white with blissful light. An
incredible experience. I have to cut it out if I'm in public, because the increase in energy becomes too noticeable, and some people freak a little
I've figured out that what my problem was these last times was not truly committing in thought. I still have sexual notions that arise from time to
time, but I simply let them pass as fleeting thoughts instead of allowing them to build. If they build, I go hard and then there's serious problems!
So I learned to not get to that point, and to express my sexuality towards myself and nature. I can't really begin to describe how my perception has
changed .. I do this touchscreen game at the local bar. One of them is this game called tai-play. I've probably got the highest score in the state,
but now I've topped my best recently, and the speed is ... freaking amazing using both hands. I feel as if my feelings alone are moving my hands ..
very difficult to properly describe. When I see the trees, or the birds, or the sky .. it's different. A greater quality of harmony is experienced,
and I .. feel .. everything!
I feel as if my feminine side is fully free to integrate into my psyche. I'm not gay or anything. I see a previous poster alluded to that.
Nope, I've always been attracted to females, but now it's as if my whole self is free to play and interact with nature and society. As if I'm born
Well, I hope this thread may help someone. If you're struggling with depression, or any other emotional/psychological issues, you may want to try
this out. Just be easy on yourself, and if you have to release, do it. It's much worse to hold it in if you've started the sexual looping process
and aren't able to sublimate properly.