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(CCHWC) Early Halloween

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posted on Oct, 17 2009 @ 09:49 PM
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Early Halloween.



“Why in the hell would I want to do a Tarot reading?” David sneered.

“Lighten up dude, it’s only a game. Hell Susan does it all the time for me, are you a sissy?” Replied Stan.

Stan, Susan, and Robin just stared at David. He ignored their stares and worked on the next bottle in the six-pack sitting by his feet. He had his reasons. Hell, there were six hundred and sixty-six reasons not to do it, but he wasn’t about to tell them.

“Let’s do shots,” said David, “Let’s lighten the frack up. Hell it’s Halloween. You mean to tell me that the only thing we can do on this night is some stupid witch thing?”.

Susan got up immediately and left the room. It wasn’t hard, David and Stan’s apartment was tiny. But going from a college dorm to this has been like moving from the pits of hell to Shangri-la. Their decorated living room was covered in posters they had collected from high school through to their second year in college. Juniors now, both were studying history as majors. David had a brief issue with the Jesuits, but came to the realization that they actually did know what they were talking about and encouraged Stan to finish out when he became the “burn-out de jour” in their second semester of their sophomore year.

None of that mattered now though. Susan, Stan’s girlfriend was pissed and was going to take this whole night down with the rest. And if luck were any part of the issue, David would spend another night wondering what kind of bra Robin was wearing.

Stan left the tiny room and went after Susan, a “wiccan“, a “practitioner” of the “arts”, and be assured, thought David, those quotation marks were firmly in place. He rolled his eyes as Stan left the room and looked at Robin, hoping to salvage something out of this night.

Robin was no help.

“You dumbass,” she hissed, “Why can’t you give her a break? She really believes in this, but ‘oh no’ mister high and mighty Jesuit-learned stuck-up feels the needed to be better than anyone else.” Robin crossed her arms over a very ample pair of breasts, that were not going to be admired tonight and glared at David.

David sighed. “Fine. I’ll do a reading. If it is that important to you, to Susan to Stan,” he rolled his eyes, “Then I’ll do it. Just please don’t be disappointed, or freaked out by this. I have had bad luck with these types of things. Hell, I don’t even read the fortune cookies when Stan and I order out.”

David stared at Robin and prayed that his response was good enough for something, anything that would get her to uncross those arms and have her smile at him again.

He was rewarded with a small smile, and it got even better when she stood up and walked over to sit on his lap.

“Alright, you bastard, I’ll give you another chance, only because you’re going to give her one.”

David smiled, not only for her, and her weird friend Susan, but for the sudden reversal of fortune on his part. This Halloween may prove to be the best yet!

Robin called Susan and Stan back into the living room. Pausing long enough, to kiss and provide some mild groping for David. He followed his part by being coy at first, then bold, then bolder. But before they could get anywhere really compromising, the other couple returned.

“Susan, I’m sorry. I just get weirded out by all this spooky stuff. I guess I’m nothing more than a big sissy.” David smiled sheepishly, and looked at both Susan and Stan, silently asking for forgiveness.

Susan smiled. “It’s ok , David, I know people get uneasy with the unknown, but babe,” she smiled, “I’m a professional. I know what I’m doing.”

Susan then sat across from David, Robin slid off his lap at got herself comfortable beside him. Stan took a chair off of Susan’s right and smiled at David.

Gave him a private thumbs up.

Susan pulled the pack of Tarot to her and started to shuffle. She didn’t say a word, closed her eyes and concentrated on the cards. The other three just stared as she prepared the deck for David. When she was finished, still without a word, she slid the deck across the battered coffee table and presented them to David.

David stared back, said, “What do I do now?” It came out as a whisper.

Susan whispered back, “Shuffle the deck, I don’t care how many times, just do it until you feel it is right. Then hand me the deck. I’m going to channel the fates, see what they see, show what they want to show. Then we can determine what the future has in store for you.”

David did as he was told, shuffled the deck, and slid it across the table back to Susan.

Susan picked up the deck.

And vomited across the table to David. The bile, early dinner, cheap beer, and a surprisingly large amount of blood splashed across David’s chest as he stared at Susan in shock.

The other two stared in shock at Susan. David jumped up and ran to his bedroom as Robin also stood, unsure whether to follow David or try to help Susan. She stayed with Susan as she continued to vomit. But now it was nothing but blood. More blood than a body could hold, but she didn’t stop non-the-less. Robin started screaming and Stan started screaming after her. Telling her to shut up, help Susan, do something. Stan just sat there. Shocked at the frantic turn of events. Susan couldn’t be that sick. She couldn’t have that much in her stomach. She couldn’t have that much blood in her body.

He just sat and stared.

Too soon, it stopped. And Susan died immediately after. Drained of blood, her shell just sat in the chair, staring at the empty space that David held, and slumped.

Caved in on herself.

Totally void of anything internal, the shell that held Susan, the shell that was Susan, collapsed onto itself.

That’s when David started screaming from his bedroom.

“I told you this was a bad idea. I told you this was wrong. Why in the frack didn’t you listen. Noooooooooooo, nononononononononononono, you had to do this. You had to bring in a real witch. This was wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong.“ There was a sob, “It was not the right time. It was supposed to be in December. Twenty-frickin’ twelve. The stuff was supposed to be ready then.”

David walked out of the bedroom. His skin a shell of red. His face, right out of a Dante nightmare. No nose, two eyes, bleeding red. Two giant horns pushing through the bleeding skin of his forehead. A mouth too wide. Too filled with teeth that didn’t belong in anything human.

Before anyone in the room could react, David tore Stan’s throat out, and casually waked the short distance to Robin. Eating the flesh, blood, bones of his former roommates’ larynx, David smiled and said to a sobbing Robin, “Happy Halloween bunny. It’s a little early, but what the frack. Let’s start the party now.”


[edit on 18-10-2009 by mikerussellus]




posted on Oct, 17 2009 @ 09:55 PM
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reply to post by mikerussellus
 


Nice one mikerussellus. I loved the ending. I mean David turning into the Devil or a demon and eating people. That was awesome. Very unexpected and very good.



posted on Oct, 17 2009 @ 09:57 PM
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reply to post by jackflap
 


Thanks. Just threw it together. Wasn't sure where it was going to go. I let the characters decide.

Mike

edit to add; Now I can start reading the other entries. Didn't before, wanted to come into this without any influence.

[edit on 17-10-2009 by mikerussellus]



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 02:55 AM
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Nice one Mike
I really like the gore factor
This one is, I think, the goriest so far



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 06:21 AM
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reply to post by briantaylor
 


Thank you.

I had fun with it.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 08:48 AM
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Definitely heavy on the gore factor. And a little language heavy, but I can deal with it because well, I am language heavy myself.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 08:55 AM
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reply to post by Ahabstar
 


I created the characters, they spoke how they were supposed to. Apologies if it was too heavy. I just hope that it passes T&C.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 09:21 AM
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For the sake of putting the issue of the contentious words in your story to rest, allow me to go over them with how I would relate the Terms and Conditions to their usage:

(note: other staff may disagree)

Frack - a new word coined by a popular television series in order to fascilitate use of common profanities that the MSM would otherwise not condone for prime time. Re: the T&C'S - admissable imo.

Pissed - A common word used to express anger or intoxication. No sexual connotations so therefore not a profanity. Re: the T&C's - admissable as well.

Bastard - a word with a double meaning in that it describes both a birth outside of marriage/union but also connotes a state of social disrespect. Re: the T&C's - admissable.

Frickin’ - the word is used to replace the common f-bomb profanity. Re: the T&C's - borderline and less acceptable than 'frack' simply because it hasn't been promoted by the MSM.

Sh#t- The word typed in full would be censored. This is the most troublesome example of all, not because of the word itself, but because it was typed in such a way as to circumvent the site censors.

On the other hand, it's my own opinion that this word should NOT be part of the 'site automatic censor' simply because it has no sexual basis in profanity and common usage like SHTF is generally allowed. However, that's for admin to decide and not myself.

Re: T&C's - deserves a snip

[edit on 18/10/09 by masqua]



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 09:25 AM
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reply to post by masqua
 


edited. Thanks for the input.

Mike



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 09:35 AM
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reply to post by mikerussellus
 


You're welcome and thank YOU for giving me the opportunity to clarify with my own opinions on such word usage.

As to the story itself, I enjoyed it.
Horror involves some gore. Imagine an Elm Street movie without spilt blood... it just wouldn't fill theaters. The typical bad guys hack, stab, impale, bite, crush, slice and dice their victims. No biggie.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 11:00 AM
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Pretty vivid and creative imagery. Well done there.

Also, I like the twist at the end, that David is a little upset that 2012 has come early, but he's willing to go for it, what the heck, let's start the party!

It holds together well.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 12:31 PM
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reply to post by Axial Leader
 


thanks for reading it.

It was fun to write. Even more fun when someone enjoys it.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 12:31 PM
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reply to post by Axial Leader
 


thanks for reading it.

It was fun to write. Even more fun when someone enjoys it.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 01:17 PM
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Hey Mike..I love the dialogue between your characters. It was most realistic..like I was sitting in the room with my own friends. (yep, swear that much..LOL)
As for the gore factor..one word...
MOMMY!!!!



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 05:46 PM
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reply to post by AccessDenied
 


As for your reading and appreciating, one word.

Thanks.



posted on Oct, 18 2009 @ 10:25 PM
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Very well done... I enjoyed the story, Very good set up too!
Good luck, I know you'll do well.



posted on Oct, 19 2009 @ 07:14 AM
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reply to post by ldyserenity
 


Thank you.

Nice to see that it is well received. Thank you all.




posted on Oct, 21 2009 @ 07:03 PM
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Whoa! Didn't see that coming. OMG it happened so fast.....lol...
(well, it did)! And yikes the 2012 connection and and all things evil and blood and stale beer and quarreling between couples and Susan knew she had the devil in her presence and it made her so ill she vomited up her entire being and then on top of everything else it was halloween! Whew!

I love it! What a terrific entry. I think you will do well in the contest.

(so, is 2012 coming early? Do you have some inside info?) lol



[edit on 10/21/0909 by ladyinwaiting]



posted on Oct, 21 2009 @ 09:29 PM
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reply to post by ladyinwaiting
 


I'd like to say that it involved intense writing and concentration, but I'd be lying.

Just more weirdness from the little grey matter 'tween my ears.

Thanks for reading it. Am glad you enjoyed it.



posted on Oct, 21 2009 @ 10:29 PM
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reply to post by mikerussellus
 


Well that was unexpected. Which is what makes it so scary.


Best of luck in the contest.



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