The MALE soapbox

Here you have it boys-
Inspired by the "Women are evil" thread...
Get up on your soapbox and let us have your best speech.
Anything you want us ladies to know about men in general..spill it.
We'll be nice about it- I promise..
*crosses fingers.

reply to post by AccessDenied


Well now, it's about time.

***This is in no way reflective of any other man as I can only speak for myself here.***

If a woman gets mad at me and refuses to tell me what's wrong, stop being mean and torturing me, when I say I don't know, I DON'T KNOW!!!!

Talk to me, I'm not a freaking mind reader all the time no matter what you women think! You would be surprised at how often I would jump to solve the problem right away, if I just knew what it was!!!


If you catch me looking at another woman in the mall, did it ever occur to you that I am picturing you in the outfit that the other woman is wearing?? Or maybe it's someone that I know from work?

Or maybe I am just admiring her as she is quite attractive. So what??
I am not wishing that I would rather be with her. Give your head a shake!!!

If I see a girl on the TV and comment that she's cute, guess what, it means I think she's cute...period..

Just because she doesn't look like you doesn't mean squat. She is cute.
Get over it...

I have a lot more, but am getting quite a headache thinking of all I have to say. More to come..............

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/cea6a63672e8.gif[/atsimg]

reply to post by AccessDenied


Do I wanna read this thread?
Yes I do!....dun worry, I'll bite my teeth (for now*eg*)
F for what is going to be an 'inspiring' thread, I'm sure

reply to post by tribewilder


good start..keep it coming.

Oh one more....

When it's your turn to do the cooking, and you try something new, please don't be offended if I say I am not struck on it.

I am not criticizing your cooking skills, just the dish for the love of god.

I don't want to lie and have the frigging thing every week for the rest of my life if I don't like it..

I would expect the same from you.
I will not say I like it if I don't, just to avoid an argument. (even though that would be less painful)

I'll be back....

Originally posted by tribewilder
Oh one more....

When it's your turn to do the cooking, and you try something new, please don't be offended if I say I am not struck on it.

I am not criticizing your cooking skills, just the dish for the love of god.

I don't want to lie and have the frigging thing every week for the rest of my life if I don't like it..

I would expect the same from you.
I will not say I like it if I don't, just to avoid an argument. (even though that would be less painful)

I'll be back....

you take turns cooking??? you mean that is an option? wow!

And another thing!!!

You got me started don't forget..

When you go out and tell me that it's my turn for the dusting and vacuuming and to have it done by the time you get home, and it's a nice day so I take the kids out fishing for the day..

Don't throw a dam hissy fit and start banging around all over the place when you get home and it's not done. STOP for just a minute and looks at those kid's faces, LISTEN to them tell their stories and realize that these memories are going to be with them for years if not their entire lives.

You have already ruined my day, don't ruin theirs..

I will get to the cleaning either later in the day, or tomorrow. I really don't give a dam about the dust bunnies when it comes to children. EVER



Well that felt good..
Still got lot's more though
[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/2f582874f73b.gif[/atsimg]

Originally posted by tribewilder
And another thing!!!

You got me started don't forget..

When you go out and tell me that it's my turn for the dusting and vacuuming and to have it done by the time you get home, and it's a nice day so I take the kids out fishing for the day..

Don't throw a dam hissy fit and start banging around all over the place when you get home and it's not done. STOP for just a minute and looks at those kid's faces, LISTEN to them tell their stories and realize that these memories are going to be with them for years if not their entire lives.

You have already ruined my day, don't ruin theirs..

I will get to the cleaning either later in the day, or tomorrow. I really don't give a dam about the dust bunnies when it comes to children. EVER



Well that felt good..
Still got lot's more though
[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/2f582874f73b.gif[/atsimg]

If I could applaud that post..I would.

reply to post by tribewilder


You cook?!?! Wow! I have only met one guy who really liked to cook and we would take turns making dinner. We were always both very honest with what we made because we were regular cooks and being that we cooked for each other all the time we valued one anothers opinion. Heck if I am going to cook for a man for the rest of my life then I want to know what he doesnt like so I dont have to make it and have him feel he has to eat it. I always ask if someone doesnt like it.

My bf felt so bad when I made a French Stew and he didnt like it. He said it smelled good all day but when he tasted it he literally spit it out. He felt so bad but I wanted his honest opinion. I made him meat loaf and potatoes and his two neighbors loved the stew and fresh home made bread so I gave them some and saved the rest for me. My bf loves that I cook and thank god he has no problem telling me what he doesnt like. I know the stew bothered him most since it was an all day thing, but I was fine with him not liking it.

He on the other hand is the grill master and I let him have it. I do not grill

reply to post by mblahnikluver



Yes I cook and I bake. I was a baker at one time

And if I ever think your getting too thin, I will start baking, and you will start gaining..


MMUUUAAAAAAHHHHHH

Originally posted by tribewilder
reply to post by mblahnikluver

 

Yes I cook and I bake. I was a baker at one time

And if I ever think your getting too thin, I will start baking, and you will start gaining..


MMUUUAAAAAAHHHHHH

OH PLEASE!!!!! Brownies, MUST HAVE BROWNIES!!!!!

I believe there are more differences between individuals than between the sexes. Everyone is different. I'm a guy who cooks & cleans (momma taught me well). Anyway, take a deep breath and pretend you're a guy, and the answers will come. That would be the shamanistic way. If you have a specific question I'll answer it.

Oh, my speech-time. Most guys LIE a lot about stupid stuff. Some guys don't ever lie at all. How do you know if he's a liar or not? Well, see if he lies ever, even small lies, and if it happens a few times, assume he's one of the liars. If you're out with a guy and he's talking with someone else and making up some story that you know isn't true, and later he tells you, "Oh I was just joking. It's no big deal." There you have it! He's probably lying to you too about something. Don't trust those guys.

I never understood why woman got so upset that her man was looking at a girl or thought she was cute. It isnt like he's going to track her down and have an affair with her. I could care less if a boyfriend of mine thought other woman were cute.

Im glad im an easygoing person. I would make a fantastic wife someday.

Now here is another one.

Every time I am out with the boys, whether it is day or night, when I say that I will be home at such and such a time, if I am unablr to be home at that time, I will call you.

Now you never asked me to do this, but I just thought it was the decent thing to do.

Now when you go out with the girls, which I actually encourage, I would expect that if you say you will be home at 9 and don't show up until 2 am, that you would at least call to say you were alright.

I don't think you are cheating on me, nor am I checking up on you. It's just common sense that one would worry.

So why do you refuse time after time to call. You say that you know you are alright and there is nothing to worry about. Go back to a previous post..

I'm not a mind reader.

And yes, I do worry...be nice to know you are OK. huh?? huh??

and NO, I'm not even getting started yet....

[atsimg]http://files.abovetopsecret.com/images/member/67e6a5b7c0a5.gif[/atsimg]

Originally posted by mblahnikluver

You cook?!?! Wow! I have only met one guy who really liked to cook

Wow really? I cook and enjoy it and for that matter lots of my buddies do too.

That said, while my buddy over here is doing a great job and really has taken quite a few of the words right out of my mouth I would just like to add one thing.

Men are not psychic! When you are upset or want us to do something, do not expect us to just magically know what it is... We are only human. Talk to us and let us know what is on your mind!

Also, do not get mad that you have to tell us what it is you want! As I said we are only human and just like you, we cannot read minds. Sit down and tell me what is on your mind and I will be happy to listen and help out as you wish.

My hubby is a great cook....Me, not so much...but I still have to cook...
Why do you guys get mad when we ask you Whats wrong?

Alright ladies...

First off, you outnumber us by at least two to one. If you guys want a boyfriend it's time you started asking guys out. (Maybe buying us dinner once and a while. You know, equality amongst the sexes?)

Second. Ok when you finally convince us that it's a good idea to move in together. This is not license to throw all our stuff away and forcing us to sever all ties to our friends.

Third. Ok your stuff in the bathroom...

You got creams, powders, goop, and glop in there, keep it freaking organized, please, and please for the love of god don't buy anything that comes in a tooth paste tube. If you must have it, don't put it anywhere near the tooth paste. I don't know about anyone else, but I am not that awake when I get up and brush my teeth in the morning. And that is a surprise that no one wants in the morning.

Next, your unmentionables. This is not what the shower curtain was designed for. I have walked into bathrooms after women have been in there and it looks like a chamber of horrors.

And needless to say, TAMPONS ARE NOT FLUSHABLE! I don't care what the box says.

Also you do know that the toilet seat does have a hinge on it right? Look before you leap and put the seat down yourself, what are your arms broken?

In the Bedroom...

Ok what's with the 50 pillows on the bed? Do we need this many freaking pillows? What do you do with all those pillows? Are you planning to make a little fort? Shesh oh Pete!

Foreplay is not just for ladies! (enough said)

Talking...

Ok ladies, we know that communication is the foundation of a lasting and loving relationship. But there has to be something to be said about efficiency.
Really girls, get to the freaking point. While we guys love to hear about Susan's relationship with her husband if you can hurry this along and get to the part where we might care just a little you might get a better response from us.

tribewilder is correct, if your mad at us, tell us why you are mad at us. (remember that communication thing? This is the time to use it) most of us skipped that class at Hogwarts and cannot read your mind no matter how hard we try.

Responses that are just said to start a fight are:

"What's wrong honey?" "Nothing" (obviously something is wrong, freaking spill it)

And the variations on "Well you should know". We don't, spell it out.

If we look upset however and you ask what is wrong, if we say nothing, we actually mean it.

reply to post by whatukno


GUILTY AS CHARGED.

Ok what's with the 50 pillows on the bed? Do we need this many freaking pillows? What do you do with all those pillows? Are you planning to make a little fort? Shesh oh Pete!

Honey..it's so I can be comfortable, and you don't have to look far to find an extra bit of leverage...
AHEM.

Originally posted by The Utopian Penguin

BUTTKISSER!