As bad as life can be sometimes, it's all worth it:

I've been meaning to create this thread, but I was worried about how I was going to assimilate it. It's all jumbled up here, so please bear with me.

I am going to cover two topics: Pain, and the lessons to be learned from life in general. Like I said, it may be jumbled. Maybe not. Lets see...

I've gone through alot of pain in my life. I'm sure you have, I'm sure the sole survivor of a family massacre does, and I'm sure that people in 3rd world countries have it bad as well...

But I used to think, "Oh, poor me" all the time. Sooner or later I realized what I typed in the previous "paragraph".

I don't want to beat you all over the head with my sad stories, because that's not exactly the point of this OP. What I want to share is my current mind-set about my "ride in life" and what I've come to realize about it all.

The pain I am talking about in particular is mental pain. Physical pain applies as well, however.

So let me say it like this: While I still deal with some hardships to this day, I've come to realize that it's all about learning. Every time a traumatic experience happens to us and we make it through, we really are stronger on the other side. It's all about experience. The more pain we feel (IMO), the more experience we have about life.

And I used to laugh at the saying, "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger". I laughed because the pain and uncomfortability of life was still destroying me even when the smoke cleared. I never felt better, and that saying seemed like nonsense to me. It all made sense once I shifted my paradigm.

Now some of us (especially myself) may not understand the first time or even the 20th time (me) why bad things happen. My conclusion is that I really think the point of life is to just literally "feel".

Check it out: That body that you and I are wearing is especially known for "feeling". We complain when we deal with pain, but we don't complain when it's all good. But no one can go through life and stay right in between happiness and sadness, or pain and joy, however (and obviously). Life is always going to be a roller coaster ride.

Another thing I have noticed is that there are lessons to be learned EVERYWHERE. Now, I will admit right now that while I may see them as they come, I may not learn from them right then and there. And as it happens, I will acknowledge the fact that, "Hey, I should learn from this", but no. My emotions, feelings - my body in general will go against it. It seems after a millions tries, however, I will finally learn that lesson, only to be confronted with another one. And another...

I am not talking about anything like "God giving us lessons". That's a moot point concerning this OP (at least that is how I am asking it to be, if you religious folks would let me). Besides, I'm an Atheist and there is not going to be any changing that.

Like I said, I'm sorry if this came out in a jumble. This was a hard one for me to put together for some odd reason.

So, anyway, I am not too fond of pain. I also have Anxiety Disorder (feels pretty bad), and that is what really drives me crazy. But I've learned to embrace not just that, but anything bad that comes my way. I am actually starting to see the good things about this "pain". The more bad things I deal with, the bigger my "pain bank" is. I consider that "pain bank" wisdom of some sort.

Also, we all know pain is extremely subjective. Who am I to say that I have it the worst? That's not the issue. Me losing a loved one could be the same as Paris Hilton getting her dog stepped on and dying. There's no way to measure it, and it's not even the point. It's all comes down to this: If you make it through a painful situation, you have the opportunity to learn from it - however that is possible...

Of course this is just my perception.

And I'm not even close to having this down to a tee. No one is - that's what makes us Human! I still curse the skies when the anxiety is ripping me to shreds or when something bad happens. But when all is said and done, there is peace of mind gained from it.

More pain = more wisdom in my eyes.

I think we are hear to learn - anything and everything - as much as a finite being can. Life is boot-camp for the soul!

I hope this hit home for some of my fellow ATS'ers.

And I just wanted to point out that me making a post like this is incredible for me. I was always the negative guy, and the one who didn't give a flying you-know-what about ANYTHING. But I decided to hang in. I even made it past wanting to kill myself, and THAT was my turning point.

[edit on 10/10/2009 by impaired]

Great post! I'm proud of you for having the courage to express yourself freely and put it out there. I think many people have felt varying degrees of pain and alienation their lives, and I think that we're all equipped in our own ways to deal with it depending upon our level of maturity at the time. I'm unsure if the purpose of life is learning to feel through pain all by itself because there are many different emotions and different levels of those emotions to feel.

I've often wondered about the purpose of life and my latest conclusion is that it may be about overcoming the dark emotions of the 'animal, or beast' and learning to love ourselves and others, forgive ourselves and others, and pass on the lessons we learn. My favorite quote is one by Ghandi when he said, 'Be the change you wish to see in the world'. Jesus said the same thing when he said, 'Love thy neighbor as thyself' and 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you'. All of the great Teachers taught basically the same message: Love others.

If everyone in the world put aside their egos, dropped their prejudices (if only for a little while) and cared for and respected other people (not just our families), we'd have peace on earth. I know we would. That's why they call it 'inner' peace. We have to create it ourselves through self work and stop seeking outwardly for it or expecting someone outside of us to bring it to us or to make us happy. That's JMHO.

Something that I've learned so far in my life is this: Happiness never meets anybody halfway.

[edit on 10-10-2009 by gazerstar]

It kind of reminded a little bit of some elements of Dianetics, but it was a good OP.

Over the past year my world-view and perspective on life has changed so much that I doubt I could encapsulate how I now feel in such a succinct way, so well done.

Sometimes, from many different angles, life can look pointless and it is all too easy to quickly grow apathetic and pessimistic. However, it is as simple as writing two lists.

List the good things in your life. List the bad things in your life.

99% of the time, the good will dominate the bad. So living a life that is majority good is far better than living no life at all. So life does have a point: pleasure.

To put it simply, the meaning of life is to enjoy life. A bit of a paradox, but it works for me.

reply to post by fooffstarr


Great post! I love your list idea. I read something similar not to long ago about making lists and trying to determine what you REALLY want. It was all in the phrasing and had to do mindset and thinking positive. Supposedly, some people are thinking negatively even when they think that they are thinking positive. We can sabotage ourselves and set ourselves up for failure and not even know it by thinking self-defeating thoughts out of habit or misphrasing our intentions. Here's a link to one of the books that I've been reading. It's full of really good information and not a chore to read like some similar books. This may be were I read about the lists.

Journey To the Ancestral Self

Great post, gave you a star and will be back to dialogue with you soon.

It's the way we, as humans, try to cope with the good and bad things in life..we look for balance and meaning in everything, even if there is none.
Our general curiosity about how the world around us works leaves us constantly looking for explanations and creating hypothesis to support our belief system.
It's all subjective, and in the grand scheme of the universe..who knows if it really means anything or not.

Good for the op, but like when i wright about my life here, i am just doing it so the scum who did this to me, are in a small way brought to the open. Mind control is a horrendous thing, in the west, i assume it goes on alot. Its just that you hear about when it goes wrong, like in my case. I think most cases of mind control, do not go wrong, and the people have no reason to be self destructive.

But you think you have problems in 3rd, and you do, but the west is full of this crazy idea of mind control now, and it has totally ffing wrecked my life. This si what i hate, and i have every right to hate the people that did this, because if they did not, although you can never say your life would of been good. All i wanted in my life was my life was mine, and mine alone. My choices and my freedom to make mistakes, should be mine.

Nobody on this planet should be using mind control, to tell people who they can and cannot be friends with. But if they go after your life, you will find you will never have any friends, and boy do the public all follow the herd.