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When did the fight start

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posted on Sep, 10 2009 @ 09:17 PM
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These are pretty funny

> >> My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
> >> She asked, 'What's on TV?'
> >> I said, 'Dust.'
> >> And then the fight started...

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming
> >> anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to
> >> 150 in
> > about 3 seconds.'
> >> I bought her a scale.
> >> And then the fight started...

> >> When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her
> >> someplace expensive... So, I took her to a gas station.
> >> And then the fight started...

> >> After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for
> >> Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my
> >> driver's license to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and
> >> realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was
> >> very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
> >> The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt
> >> revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your
> >> chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security
> application.
> >> When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
> >> Social Security office.
> >> She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
> >> disability, too.'
> >> And then the fight started...

> >> My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and
> >> I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone
> >> at a nearby table.
> >> My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
> >> 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
> >> drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear
> >> she hasn t been sober since.'
> >> 'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on
> >> celebrating that long?'
> >> And then the fight started...

> >> I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my
> >> order first.
> >> "I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."
> >> He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""
> >> Nah, she can order for herself."
> >> And then the fight started...

> >> A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
> >> She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband,
> >> 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
> >> I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
> >> The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'
> >> And then the fight started.....

> >> I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Light for $14.95.
> >> Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.
> >> I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the
> >> cold cream
> >> And then the fight started....

> >> My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told
> >> her not as much as the dress she wore yesterday
> >> And then the fight started.....

> >> A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies.
> >> Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside
> >> The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled at the man
> >> 'Holy crap. That must be my husband!'
> >> So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumped out the
> > window.
> >> He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bush and to
> >> his car as fast as he could go.
> >> A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroom and
> >> screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'
> >> The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
> >> And then the fight started.....

> >> Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch,
> >> grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.
> >> I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to back out into
> >> a torrential downpour.
> >> The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage,
> >> turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all
> day.
> >> I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into
> >> bed.
> >> I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation,
> >> and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.'
> >> My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid
> >> husband is out fishing in that?'
> >> And then the fight started ...

> >> I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary? "
> >> It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
> >> "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
> >> So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"
> >> And that's when the fight started....

> >> My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we
> >> were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
> >> "No," she answered.
> >> I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
> >> She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
> >> So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
> >> And that's when the fight started....




posted on Sep, 12 2009 @ 05:19 AM
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> >> My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we
> >> were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
> >> "No," she answered.
> >> I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
> >> She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
> >> So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
> >> And that's when the fight started....

These are pretty good .
then the thread got responded to...



posted on Sep, 12 2009 @ 07:32 AM
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Originally posted by The Utopian Penguin
> >> My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we
> >> were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
> >> "No," she answered.
> >> I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
> >> She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
> >> So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
> >> And that's when the fight started....

These are pretty good .
then the thread got responded to...


omg..i love that one!!!!1
lol



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