A Little Help For Women Trying To Understand Men!

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posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 01:15 AM
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Thankyou for reminding me why I love being single.




2. Men take things literally. If you say don't buy me a present, to us that doesn't mean buy you a present. If you say you don't care (even if you do) it means you don't care to us. Say what you mean for the love of god.

Sorry, ain't gonna happen, women aren't wired that way. That's one you guys are just going to have to live with.




3. Men need more alone time than women or we go clinically insane. For some it's a trip to the garage to work on the truck / car. For others it's a good video game or sports match. Don't think this means we don't like being around you. Many times some of us need a few hours by ourselves. Don't worry your pretty little head you will see him again!

Then just say something like, "I need to clear my head for a bit. Would you like me to pick something up for you on the way home?" Women get that, and it kills at least 5 birds with one stone, and a guaranteed way to keep us from hasseling guys about it.

Your # 5 is what your checking other women is to us. There has to be a compromise there.


6. Men don't like when women make everything about them all the time. They like to be included in things and feel emasculated otherwise. (for another definition of emasculation please see #5) If he comes home and starts talking about how *snip* his day was, don't chime in and one up him. We hate that. This is one time a man will think you don't give a (snip).

We generally take that as an invention to do so, but I can see your point on that one.



17. Some men like to wrestle around with you. They really don't mean to hurt you, they probably didn't realize they where pushing or pulling too hard. Let them know but please don't get mad for it. You where having fun before it happened.

What happens is we start to feel like maybe the guy doesn't think we are being feminine enough, so we have to show that we are girly and dainty. Its not really about getting hurt.

#22 We can respect that as long as you respect that clothes and shoes (not the shoes for me but for many women it is) are the same for us.




posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 01:58 AM
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Originally posted by DaMod
reply to post by Hazelnut
 


Yup, I can't speak for every man but a mister nice guy is always a sure fire winner. It's too bad that these are often the last choice. I've seen a lot of good guys get screwed over this way.


We sure do...sometimes I wonder what it would of been like if I were the player kind of guy, because in the end all being mister nice guy 100% of the time lead to was a bunch of heartbreaks and never-ending chases. Wish I could just push a button and become a different person, but, I am who I am


It seems that they push you into friend zone, and once your in the dreaded friend zone, well, then you just #$*@ outta luck.
I guess they put us in the "friend zone" because they fear that being in a relationship could make them lose you in the end? And they put you in the friend zone so that there is much less of a chance that they will lose you?


Ahhhh, such a confusing world we live in!



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 06:25 AM
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Fact number one...only one that matters...we don care what u think...ur dreams, ur beliefs, and etc...do not get us wrong ...we love you ...but some of the BS you thin of is useless to us'. Of course you will have those...that will say whatver u think...yadyadya....in the end they will ask u to ......fukk em...an if not..they will offer u to let them sleep over at thiers or a friends house...but remember ur choice


[edit on 28-8-2009 by kerazeesicko]



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 07:12 AM
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Now i don't know if this is global or just something limited to my country but especially around the office you'll hear a lot of women argument that atleast they can multi-task and do several things at once......

This has to stop!!!


On average men have a better spatial perceptual understanding than women. Which basically means we should be better, on average, in parallel parking and that sorta thing. It is a proven scientific fact just as much as women, on average, are better at multi tasking and doing many things at the same time.......on average!!!!

So to be claiming that, because you are a woman, you are automatically better in multi tasking is a flaw. I know a lot of women who seem to struggle handling one thing at a time and are not perse better than me in multi tasking....

Now this argument goes the opposite way aswell when you hear men tell you that they are better at driving a car because they are men but since i belong to this group i'm not gonna argument against my fellow genderians.

On average their are a lot of differences between men and women but that's just an average......Individually you have a lot of variation.

I'm 31 and have been with my life partner for over 17 year now and to be honest we are both equally good drivers and multitasking is something we both mastered when our three kids came into the picture. We think the same and we do the same. So to be talking about the differences between men and women ,to me, comes across as a bit generalizing.

Stop putting things in certain boxes and trying to find the differences...

Peace


[edit on 28/8/2009 by operation mindcrime]



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 07:30 AM
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reply to post by DaMod
 


ha ha ha

nice post. i wish i had this list when i was twenty, would have saved me years of grief.

-subfab



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 07:38 AM
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reply to post by DaMod
 


We are warriors in the oldest most viciously fought war in the Universe "The War of the Sexes" Actually I'm retired and loving being "alone" that includes sleeping alone.



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 07:47 AM
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reply to post by MrDesolate
 



I've been saying this to my girlfriend for like almost 7 years now...I've been sleeping on the couch for the last 6 and 3/4, mind you!



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 08:02 AM
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To all the Mr. Nice Guys,

I used to be you. I feel your pain, but I will tell you how to win the chase! Just stop paying attention for a few days. That's it! Pretty simple, right? Just ignore her calls and don't get caught staring at her deeply. If your situation calls for conversation keep it professional and polite, but don't extend yourself to the point you are "chasing" her. Girls like a challenge and if they can get everything they need from you without having to "date" you, why would they?

You have to show them that you "can be" nice. Then take that away slightly so they realize that you have needs, desires, and whims as well. They will respect you more if you make them earn your affection and attention. If for whatever reason my advice fails then you might possibly have been beaten with an ugly stick and there isn't much hope in this case, or she is an evil abuser of men, but at least try. If it turns out you got an ugly stick to the dome, then search out a girl that also got the business end of said stick and repeat advice until you have reached desired affect.

I don't mean to be harsh. It's just that I've got friends who thought they just didn't have game or gab, whatever you call talking up a female, and in truth they just have bad breathe and poor skin and don't use deodorant as liberally as they vote. It's sad and funny...but mostly sad!

Just Joe



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 08:51 AM
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Great post. S+F

I also agree with the previous poster about the "chasing game".



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 08:52 AM
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Funny post, but in all seriousness atempting to really understand the opposite sex (men and women) is pointless.

Just be 100 percent honest, if they can't deal with it end it. No games it shortens your life.

[edit on 28-8-2009 by drock905]



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 08:55 AM
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reply to post by DaMod
 


1) Men do have emotions and more than you probably think, personally girls always had play with mine until the day I leave because they were to closed in their mind and sees only what she want to see and not what the man is feeling.

2) Yes is yes and no is no, is this so hard to understand?

3) Women and their ego.... you are not the only things in our life, our life is made of full of things and we do find some interest in some of those things, beings glued to each other all the time is fine but just a little time.

4) Women pay to much attention at the way they look while we absolutely don't care, saying you just fine when she is expecting an 'your incredible", it's almost like a crime against humanity, what a life


5) Amen, I've been down so I downed too, but for her it was only me.

6) at the end of the day, stress evacuation is needed, it sure if the women is not listening to what the men say, I would be fed up.

7) If only it was just the socks


8) If we don't do it, we could explose from the inside


9) That's what we call having fun, tv realities is not our cup of tea.

10) Concentration is concentration just try later and attract his attention.

11) Usually it was "You don't understand anything" and when I asked "what I Don't understand?" she answered forget it, ok........... but I just don't get it.

12) We are not robot nor servant.

13) We all have different views, choice, ideas, etc... the better is to find someone who have the same interest as you.

14) It works in both way, lot of women is playing video game now, so this advice works for both


15) breaking a nail will not bring disaster on earth, it's just a nail.

16) No TV at home so I have nothing to say about that


20) men and women cheat, if they do it, it means they are not with the ONE, it could hurt but just face it, you were with the wrong person.

21) If he was so nice why did you leave him? Don't speak about your ex and all will be fine, otherwise we'll think you are still in love for hilm and you will possibly leave us for him.

22) never without my no-life computer




Did not see the greeneye post but wanted to give my point of view from damod's answers.

I'm not anymore trying to understand women as I never will so I decided to stay alone, it's far more easy to live like that



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 09:13 AM
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Hehe, a fun thread.

I heard a topic like this a while ago on a radio show, and the host was making me laugh, and I generally agreed with him.

He was saying that most of the stuff women do to attract men actually end up having no impact or a negative impact for many men, things like jewellery, piercings, tattoos, nails, strange hairdos. His argument was that men go for much simpler things, like boobs, or if you don't have much of those, a smile will work too. His main advice was to spend the hour a day or so you spend on all this garbage on the treadmill instead, and you'll get much better results.

I know this doesn't count for all men/women, but I was in agreement, slim and a nice smile will do it for me everytime far more than all the "accessories".



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:06 AM
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Originally posted by dugganj83
I know this doesn't count for all men/women, but I was in agreement, slim and a nice smile will do it for me everytime far more than all the "accessories".

Absolutely (minus the slim part for me, but each to his own
) - with one exception.

Ladies who wear glasses - don't switch to contacts thinking that it makes you look more attractive. Glasses are sexy. No exceptions



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:08 AM
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I have to admit I am one of those "How does this look?" girls. I generally dont get mad at the answer even if it is just a "fine" but most women dont appreceiate that.

Other than that I am not your "normal" girl and I dont respond or react to things the way "normal" girls do...unless you count overreacting, I do that A LOT!

but thank you for the wonderful tidbit of information...if I ever decide to not be single again I will remember it all, and not screw up like I did with my last relationship.



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:19 AM
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Originally posted by schrodingers dog
23. Its not that we don't love your mother, but really...do we have to like her?


Ha ha ha!
Man! You rock!



Originally posted by Hazelnut
Mr. Nice Guy



Remember that guy that had the biggest crush on you throughout the duration of your lives but you put him in the friend zone? You know the guy that put you on a pedestal and is so madly in love with you that he would do anything for you but you again put him in the friend zone? Yeah big mistake! Those aren't the only ones like that though, some of us wouldn't cheat ever.


I put him in the friend zone because I was sick to death of men ruining my life. Chasing me until they caught me only to lose interest once the "chase" was over. But this one didn't go away, didn't pressure, didn't do any of the annoying chasing, he was just persistently there for me, wanting to be my friend.

After I learned I could trust him, we fell in love and got married. He's not chasing me anymore, but I couldn't live without him now. He is my Mr. Nice Guy.


Thanks for posting this Hazelnut.
Men on this thread!
Pay attention to this!


But this one didn't go away, didn't pressure,

and this!

didn't do any of the annoying chasing,

and this!

he was just persistently there for me, wanting to be my friend


Please please with sugar on top!

Well you can relax a bit on the "persistently there". Show some mystery instead. But just a bit don't overdo it


It is so simple. They need to be attracted to you. Constant chasing just won't do it. It repels them.

Act as a friend! they will trust you more like this.
Don't be needy, don't rush things. Just stay cool. "You
got more important things on the horizon.."
They will fall in love with you, trust me!
You have to believe in this way to yourself too. Just be you. Be natural and relaxed, never lie (they can always tell)

If by any chance the situation doesn't work out, on to the next one.
There are plenty out there!


There will even be no need for threads of men understanding women or women understanding men. (and that would be the greatest part
)

Keep going! Nice thread.


[edit on 28-8-2009 by spacebot]

[edit on 28-8-2009 by spacebot]



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:22 AM
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3. Men need more alone time than women or we go clinically insane


I don't know about that one. My husband always wants to hang out with me. It's me who goes insane from not enough alone time. Maybe we are an odd couple.



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:24 AM
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The only thing that could probably improve in my house is my need to control the remotes. If I can't ff through my DVR or switch channels, it drives me absolutely crazy to have to sit through my husband doing it.



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:51 AM
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reply to post by calstorm
 



Your # 5 is what your checking other women is to us. There has to be a compromise there.


It's called the look don't touch rule, and it works wonders.



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 10:56 AM
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reply to post by dugganj83
 





I know this doesn't count for all men/women, but I was in agreement, slim and a nice smile will do it for me everytime far more than all the "accessories".


EXACTLY. Where did women get the stupid, idiot idea that all that slop, crap and stuff they put on makes them more beautiful... oh yeah- the media.

It doesn't help. In my case, at least (like any women here would even be remotely interested in *my* opinion), The more natural a woman is, the more I like her. Not only that- but has anyone actually seen actresses who end up being painted like a stolen car constantly without makeup? They look completely hideous! All that makeup on them has seriously eroded how they look! Wrinkles, splotchy, nasty skin... Why consign oneself to something like that? Oh yeah... 'you're all so complicated'. Spare us, huh?

There's another side to this as well...actually, more than just one. We have the guys who flip for women painted so much, they can stop bullets, and women who do this to actually repel guys.

If a woman isn't happy with who she is and how she looks naturally, and cant go anywhere without a complete paint and body shop stuffed in her purse- I personally wont bother with her one bit.



posted on Aug, 28 2009 @ 11:10 AM
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Another thing I wanted to add,,

People have to figure out who the dominant personality is.. If there are two people who do not want to take the lead on things then it aint going to to work...in my opinion...

If it is the girl, then the man needs to figure out what his role is.

I would say 90% of the time it is not the girl, but some guys are raised to be more passive..Aint nothing wring with it I suppose, but much of the time a woman likes a man to be the dominant personality.

For example. The kid asks mom, "can I spend the night at so and sos house?"

mom says: "Ask your dad "

Dad says "No. And thats final." Foot goes down because dad has the last say...


Not saying major decisions that have to be made shouldnt be done mutually. Surely they should be made by both parties. But there needs to be someone in charge per say to do the leading. If they are both wuss bags and not willing to step up, I wouldnt doubt the chick who probably was raised to be more passive than aggressive would grow a tad weary of a man not willing to step up...

Hopefully I got my point across...without sounding like a schovanist...



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