Ask A Schizophrenic Anything

reply to post by lifecitizen


I've been through some frightening experiences, but I always know when I'm seeing reality, and when I'm not. That is why I'm off my meds.

I've told my family, and my psychiatrist, that if I ever feel violent, towards myself or others, that I will notify them and take the medication needed.

I'm young, but I've been dealing with it for a little over half a year now. Also, there are older people in my family with schizophrenia, so I grew up understanding it(as much as I could, then. Now more than I want, hah).

The main thing I do is keep a positive attitude. It's easy to get delusional when depressed or stressed, so I always make sure I see the beauty in the world before I let things get me down.

It always helps.

Thank you for looking out for me, though. It does mean a lot.

reply to post by CleverNameHere


I never knew you could feel it in your head...

mind telling us what it feels like?

reply to post by CleverNameHere


Do you think it could partly be hormones?

I have a family member who is becoming schizophrenic. In this case, it is mostly environment. I think it even started as a baby. Crawling backwards isn't exactly average.

This is on of my mottos though-There's no such thing as normal.

reply to post by Neo_Serf


The majority of the hallucinations take place after I fall asleep and reawaken in a world that doesn't exist. Mostly, as I've said, I keep myself locked in my room, though locks don't keep out things that aren't there. An apparition that looks like my cousin came into my room once, and we had an entire conversation.

I knew he wasn't real for two reason:

1. When he spoke, I didn't hear his voice like one normally would another human's voice. It was in my head directly, just as my usual voices are. Also, there was a slight lag in his mouth moving and the words reaching my mind.

2. He opened a locked door. Haha.


One of the most frightening episodes I've had is when I woke up with sleep paralysis, and there was a demon-looking apparition standing next to my door. It wouldn't come near me, but it was looking at me for about thirty seconds, and then simply walked through my locked door, never to appear again. Only after he left was I able to move again.

I had to rethink myself sane again. I wouldn't leave my room for three days. I mostly stayed on ATS and Stickam(seeing other people really helps), but I played a few games, and listened to lots of music. My cousin brought me food(which I did work for later, I don't bum off of anyone).

What I think happened is I woke up with sleep paralysis, and it's common to have hallucinations during that even if you're mentally healthy. My schizophrenia, I'm sure, is what made it scarier than normal(though I don't know what normal sleep paralysis is?). Then, the "apparition" left because my mind subconsciously knew that my body was about to awaken.

Yes, I can always tell whether something is "real" or "unreal."

reply to post by Night Star


Yes, the reason I stay off of medication is because I don't want to experience the first year in which I will be trying different things until I get the one that is for me.

I myself am not violent, and neither are the other schizophrenics in my family.

Thank you.

reply to post by CleverNameHere

When I go to sleep, I wake up in another world. I just stay in my room for a while, and keep the door locked, because I know it isn't a real world outside my bedroom.

I would like to hear more about this. Is this a type of dream you have? When you wake up are you aware it was just a dream? When you are in this other world do you feel like you are in the physical?

Best regards.

reply to post by CleverNameHere


Do you know what your Break was?
Is your condition genetic or chemical?

Originally posted by CleverNameHere
reply to post by lifecitizen

 

I've been through some frightening experiences, but I always know when I'm seeing reality, and when I'm not. That is why I'm off my meds.

I've told my family, and my psychiatrist, that if I ever feel violent, towards myself or others, that I will notify them and take the medication needed.

I'm young, but I've been dealing with it for a little over half a year now. Also, there are older people in my family with schizophrenia, so I grew up understanding it(as much as I could, then. Now more than I want, hah).

The main thing I do is keep a positive attitude. It's easy to get delusional when depressed or stressed, so I always make sure I see the beauty in the world before I let things get me down.

It always helps.

Thank you for looking out for me, though. It does mean a lot.

ok cool you sound pretty in control and know where you're at- I didnt mean to sound like you would harm others neccasarily... one of my dearest friends is paranoid schizophrenic, a heart the size of Texas, he would NEVER harm anyone..he only ever harms himself and self harms when off his meds, its very sad, just didnt know how aware you were but you sound fine - all the best

reply to post by Miraj


I recently got a new job at a local pizza place delivering pizzas, and the owners are actually thinking about promoting me to manage the place once they leave. It's exciting for me, because it's a simple job, so I don't have to go too deep mentally to do the required tasks.

Clean dishes, make a pizza, ring someone's order up, deliver!

I'm a very quiet person, in person. I've taught myself to think about things I say before I say them. On here, my fingers type away at the speed of light, so I get to keep up with my head.

Quite a journey you are on in life. You seem to be handling it well and have a great sense of humor. I will keep watching this thread to see the questions and answers.

Are you able to keep a job?

reply to post by Geladinhu


My anchor is my family. They are FANTASTIC, and have been through a lot with me. I live with my parents, as I'm not trusted to live by myself, nor do I trust myself alone.

My parents in particular are amazing. They're very understanding, and I'm able to talk with them about my hallucinations and delusions, and they always talk me back down to reality. It's a blessing to have them in my life.


My grand plan is to eventually write a book about my experiences as a schizophrenic. I know there are a lot of people interested in our way of life, and how we interpret things.

With the money I make from the book(books??), I hope to set up a bank account in preparation for my future. As a schizophrenic, you never know when you're going to completely lose it. It may never happen, it may happen twenty years from now. It makes me rest easy knowing that once it does happen, I will have the money to take care of myself. I couldn't imagine being a sponge to the very people that've been so great and understanding about all of this.

If I don't write a book, I'm still saving from my current job. I get great tips(and don't go out a lot, ha), so I'm able to save up all my paychecks into an account, and that's been building up.


The last time I remember acting untypically to the point of people ignoring me, I was a kid. I usually keep to myself unless spoken to, and then I never speak without first knowing what I'm going to say.


The greatest value is family. You don't have to have any blood-relatives alive to know what family feels like. They are the people that you know will always take care of you, even if you don't want to(though you know you won't let that happen, if you can help it).

Never forget who your family are. They are the reason you're here today.

As far as I know, I'm 100% of the time aware and conscious. I've had no blackouts, or "glitches" where time seems to have skipped a few hours or so. I think most schizophrenics block out a lot of what happens to them, and then they get into the habit of blocking it out, which is why their lives can get so confusing.

Bit of advice: If you're schizophrenic, let it happen. Don't try to deny it. If you let yourself forget one time, you will never know if you've done it 100 times before. That's when you lose your grip on reality.

reply to post by CleverNameHere


I see. That's pretty good. It might just be the media talking (and psychology classes) but I've heard that schizophrenia is often very debilitating..

What age did the schizophrenia start for you?

Do your employers know about your schizophrenia, if so do they treat you any differently? (Better or worse)

reply to post by dankanight13


It's almost like a headache, but it feels like a tiny pinprick of an area. It doesn't hurt, but you can feel it, and it actually moves with your head when you turn it and whatnot.

It's pretty weird, but it's something that lets me know I'm still alive when I wake up.

reply to post by winotka


Haha, very true. There IS no such thing as normal.

I'm sure it has a great deal to do with hormones. It usually happens late teens-early twenties. I'm 20, and have been feeling out of sorts since I was 14/15, but have only felt it full-on since December 2008.

reply to post by harvib


Yes, it's a type of dream. I know I'm dreaming, because I was able to hover over my bed for a few seconds before scaring myself, haha.

When I wake up, I am able to remember everything that happened, but my body is fully refreshed like I got a full night's sleep. Sometimes, I fall right back asleep once I enter my dream world, and it reminds me of how sleeping used to feel when I was a kid; waking up and having it feel like you just fell asleep.

I usually surf the internet, though. It's HILARIOUS in my dream world. Of course, it's only filled with things that I've seen and can remember.

I can control anything in my dream world, which is nice, but I made the mistake of leaving my room one time to experience more of the world.

It wasn't too bad, but I always had this feeling that if I didn't get back to my room, I would lose my body. I feared that if I forgot that I was actually in my room, sleeping, that I would get lost in the dream world. Perhaps that is when other schizophrenics go in deep and lose it completely?


I don't really feel like I'm in the physical world, because there is no pain, only pressure. A trick I do to amuse myself is I'll poke my right index finger through my left palm, and wiggle my index finger as I watch it poke through the skin.

Silly, but it keeps me in high spirits.

Has it ever passed through your mind that you could actually turn your condition to your side? I know it sounds like delusional behavior, but have you ever consider the schizophrenia as a gift that could bring more gifts?

I know you plan in writing books and all, but do you think your condition could actually make you become a better human and spiritual being that you could ever be without it?

Do you consider the possibility of someday snapping out of schizophrenia? And by this I mean not being deceived by your mind and not giving attention to any attempt of perturbation by it?

How real can your hallucinations get? You said you know how to tell whats real from what is not. Have you ever experienced moments in which you had no idea what was real and what was not?

reply to post by reticledc


I'm sorry, but I'd rather not talking about my Break(I imagine you mean the point at which I went from sane to schizophrenic?). It's still a very emotional topic for me, and I've still never told anyone. Again, I'm sorry, but for me, some things are better left untouched.


I think it's a mix of genetic and chemical. I did some stupid drugs in my younger teen years, and then there are a few others in my bloodline with schizophrenia.

reply to post by CleverNameHere


Do you believe this dream world to be real or your a figment of your mind? I have had a few recent dreams in which I realized I was dreaming while in the dream. I remember exploring the dream world and trying to fly. It was very weird but very cool. I had never before been in a dream and realized I was dreaming. I hope it happens again.

reply to post by Miraj


On some days, it can be debilitating.

There are days when I don't trust myself driving, if my visual hallucinations are more frequent than usual.

Other days I stay locked in my room, because I'm unsure whether I'm really awake or not.


I believe it started for me around 14/15, and gradually the hormones helped it worsen until about 19, and then December 2008 came alone, and I reached a stand-still.

Yes, my employers are actually family. They know about my condition. They treat me a little better(which I tell them not to), because I think they believe that if I'm uncomfortable, I can flip, but usually they leave me alone. I do my job, and they usually never ask me to do anything because I know what has to be done. They're always "Are you okay? Are you hungry?" "Do you need to sit down, take a break?" etc. They're great people.

reply to post by CleverNameHere


Your avatar is amazing!

Can you create your own visual or auditory halucinations?