Aw crud. That's the day after my birthday. I usually get a little tipsy, I can't see me being able to hold it in all day.

Is this in the US, or the UK? Will UK bathrooms be safe?

OMG, I'll have to get a catheter or I'll be hopping around all day.

They've already started !!!

I was savaged by a hamster last night just after I returned from a bathroom visit.

We must get this out as soon as possible - the fate of the world is in the balance !

Cant guarantee that i wont go for a crap but i'll try not too.