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Fitting In. Or Being Different.

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posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 10:46 PM
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Or being different to fit in.

I don't know. I have a bunch of different thoughts I can't really put together. I'll try.

Do you think it's important to fit in? In any stages of life?

I think there is three types of people with this. The "in crowd", the "anti crowd-crowd" and the people don't show what they are in.

The only example I can think of is with a site like Twitter. You have the people who use it. Then you have the people who don't use it, and let everyone know they don't use it. They want to be different from the crowd so they can fit in with another crowd. Being different to fit in. If that makes sense.



Or what about those who dress a certain way so they can be different from everyone else. But then they only hang out with people who are doing the same thing?

Does anyone really want to be different from everyone else? Or only different from some?

Alright, say there was a room full of 100 people. 90 were wearing green shirts. The other 10 were wearing blue shirts. And you had to pick between wearing a green or blue shirt, which would you wear? Would you pick green to go with the crowd? Or pick blue to go against the crowd?

Do you want to fit in? Or do you want to be different. Or do you not care which you are.

[edit on 8/10/09 by enjoies05]




posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 10:51 PM
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Interesting thread!

Funny thing with me is...I fit in everywhere, with all types of people! I don't know why or how. People just like me. I am not boasting, its just the truth. I fit in with the ceo and I fit in with the janitor. I think the secret is to just be yourself. I am of the mind that you take me as I am or get over yourself... I don't change the way that I behave depending on the crowd that I am in at the time. I am always just me!



posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 10:53 PM
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reply to post by Greenize
 


Yes. Being yourself is the best way to go.

That should have been my third group. The people who just be themselves.



posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 11:00 PM
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It always chapped my buns to be around people who were being one way until someone they considered to be "important" or whatever walks into the room and they totally change their demeanor... I never understood that... be true to yourself!



posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 11:06 PM
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I started thinking about this because I was talking to my friend. He likes thing until they become trends. When they become trends and the "in crowd" likes them, he doesn't anymore.

Isn't that the same idea as someone who follows the crowd? Just opposite?

If you like really something, stay with in when it's trendy, and when it's not trendy.



posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 11:14 PM
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reply to post by enjoies05
 


I see. I know people like that too. There is nothing wrong with that. Sounds like your friend likes to be different. Something is cool until everyone else has it, then its boring! Perhaps your friend is a trend setter!




posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 11:18 PM
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Originally posted by enjoies05
Or being different to fit in.

I don't know. I have a bunch of different thoughts I can't really put together. I'll try.

Do you think it's important to fit in? In any stages of life?

I think there is three types of people with this. The "in crowd", the "anti crowd-crowd" and the people don't show what they are in.

The only example I can think of is with a site like Twitter. You have the people who use it. Then you have the people who don't use it, and let everyone know they don't use it. They want to be different from the crowd so they can fit in with another crowd. Being different to fit in. If that makes sense.



Or what about those who dress a certain way so they can be different from everyone else. But then they only hang out with people who are doing the same thing?

Does anyone really want to be different from everyone else? Or only different from some?

Alright, say there was a room full of 100 people. 90 were wearing green shirts. The other 10 were wearing blue shirts. And you had to pick between wearing a green or blue shirt, which would you wear? Would you pick green to go with the crowd? Or pick blue to go against the crowd?

Do you want to fit in? Or do you want to be different. Or do you not care which you are.

[edit on 8/10/09 by enjoies05]


A balance of the two is needed.......

Hard to explain but both are needed.


Everybody WANTS to fit in and be liked.........

Many people want to be different.....I mean nobody wants to hear " Oh your just like so and so".........because that is false....

No person is like any other person....that is why we have different memories, and fingerprints and DNA and mentalities and preferences in everything in life....Even twins are not nearly the same person....


It's funny that some people who " don't want to fit in " and " just want to be different" end up like everyone else...


There were certain groups back in highschool who purposely stood out because they did not want to conform to the popular kids and were trying real hard to be different , but then there were like 10 of them and they all talked the same, dressed the same, did the same activities, and ect........

So really they weren't being any different , they were being more " the same" then we were but they didn't realize it......but I figure they just wanted others to be like them or to have their own " comfort zone" within the school which is totally understandable........



posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 11:38 PM
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reply to post by enjoies05
 


The key is to have the courage to be who you are. Society will be anti-you at first but eventually you will have the world at your beck and call.

I recommend you check out "Be your own God". Specifically the part about Self-Reliance.




[edit on 10-8-2009 by HunkaHunka]



posted on Aug, 10 2009 @ 11:50 PM
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reply to post by enjoies05
 


Green or blue? 10 percent blue 90 percent green. Hmm tough choice. I would say that I would be the 1 who chose neither. And went without a shirt.



posted on Aug, 11 2009 @ 12:27 AM
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Do you want to fit in? Or do you want to be different. Or do you not care which you are.


This above all: to thine own self be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man. ~ Hamlet

If you value honesty at all, be honest with yourself. If you cannot be honest with yourself, you cannot be honest to another. The very image you present to them would be a falsehood. Of course, this begs the statement:

Know Thyself ~ Greek aphorism



posted on Aug, 11 2009 @ 12:33 AM
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Be yourself! Bottom line. Why be a clone of everyone else? What makes them more important than yourself or you more important than them? Just enjoy being you.



posted on Aug, 11 2009 @ 12:35 AM
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You're not going to please all of the people all of the time.

Once you see that and accept it, you free yourself to be authentic and save yourself a lot of time and messing around.



posted on Aug, 11 2009 @ 12:36 AM
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There are two options in the final analysis, conform or transform, and if you transform you don't care.



posted on Aug, 11 2009 @ 03:56 AM
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I guess there must be a fourth group of people, otherwise i could not explain myself:
Wherever i go, i fit in no group. But not like dismissed by everyone, more like something completely unique that is valued by some and hated by others, but never ignored. Wherever i go, i polarize, groups change, become more hateful or lovely or whatever. Even when i want to fit in, nobody believes me. I cannot lie. On the other hand, if i do not like people, they will understand it pretty fast and will react unappropriately angry and really hurt.

My entire life it was like that. Needless to say that i don't like big groups, i feel misunderstood and realize how dumb a group makes an individuum. That's why i'd wear the blue shirt, only to have a smaller group. Or walk out of the room.



In a way, i think that everyone feels like that. They only ignore their true feelings to not be dismissed but "liked", whatever that means in this context. I could never do that



posted on Aug, 11 2009 @ 04:54 AM
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Originally posted by enjoies05
I think there is three types of people with this. The "in crowd", the "anti crowd-crowd" and the people don't show what they are in.

Alright, say there was a room full of 100 people. 90 were wearing green shirts. The other 10 were wearing blue shirts. And you had to pick between wearing a green or blue shirt, which would you wear? Would you pick green to go with the crowd? Or pick blue to go against the crowd?

Do you want to fit in? Or do you want to be different. Or do you not care which you are.

[edit on 8/10/09 by enjoies05]


I have always walked to the beat of my own drum (you may already be able to tell that from my previous posts) and not given any thought about whether or not people liked me. I just said and did what was right, even when it was an unpopular belief. As long as I was not saying or doing something that hurt anyone else, I really didn't care.

I went to one of my high school reunions and found out from everyone there that they admired my courage to be who I was and not conform to the majority standard.

The irony: I spent a lot of time alone reading books, listening/writing music and watching movies, but everyone thought I was popular.


As for the shirts? My favorite colors are green, purple and black. If I chose the green, it would only be because the shade of green is one I liked. Otherwise, I would pick a color I like. So, the assumption by others would be that I conformed, when really it was just something I liked and found agreeable.

The bottom line for me is, I am who I am and that's all I am. If like attracts like, then I would attract those to me who like what I like. And if I am the Lone Soldier, then so be it! At least I'm doing what I like and value.




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