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Stay out of my Head

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posted on Aug, 5 2009 @ 10:39 PM
Deafening. The hum of the fridge. The television that hasn't had a viewer in two days. The clock with a second hand that can't make it past the nine without falling back down to try it again. The phone, ready to ring, nothing standing in it's way. Ready to take the call, add to the noise or take away from it. Ah, some friends, well one. Crickets can be friends, right?
Been told about my rage before. He was nicer when he said it though. Anger. Not a bad word. Doesn't seem so negative. Damn old man. If she was here, she would distract me. It's her job after all. That's what she's made for.
You seemed so smug, you prick. Have you ever been hated by a stranger? Wonder what it feels like? Oh to have my finger on the button. You probably wouldn't lose a wink. The sight of you makes me ill. oh wait, that's a mirror.
Have you ever thought that maybe you should have been aborted? I have. Would it make my life easier if you weren't around? The main problem, there would be another just like you, maybe even worse.
Why aren't you here to make my noodles? I hope you're having fun where you're at.
What's with the incessant prodding? You can't fix me. Why do you even try?
How much more do you think you can take? You know the only time I'm happy, is when I'm angry. So, come home and make me angry, so that I can be happy.
You have to have a spot to jump off, or there's no stopping it. Why do you always insist on getting in front of my anger? You know I'm going to take it all out on you.
Because you chose to be hear with me.
I told you. I warned you. You told me that you loved me anyway, no matter what. Welcome to no matter what.
You were sitting there on the stairs when the old man was pissed off about the trash. Why did you have to open your mouth about the other stuff too? That'll be another ass whoopin I'm sure. You were such a bitch. I was surprised when I saw you cry. I thought that ability had long since dried up.
I know it wasn't your fault and the old man was piece of work. You did the best you could.
Funny how the best I could do is always so much better than the best you could do.
If I don't get it out, It's going to kill me. I want to live. I miss you, in a weird way.

posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 04:07 AM
You don't miss me. It's just that you love having a father. If I come home and make your noodles you will be alone again in the dark place. You know you hate the dark. You may be better at everything than I am but are you really? No you're not. You know you're not. It's just that the old man loves you. Yes I was sitting on the stairs and yes I cried. I don't do trash and you know it. That's your job. I cook, you do the trash. Get it? The problem is that el stupid can't tell us apart. Why don't you go clean your filty bedroom? I can't stand to even go down the hall knowing what a dump it is. You think I don't know about your filty little magazines under the mattress? I know. I know everything. I just can't do anything about it. He wouldn't listen to me anyway. Everytime I try to talk to him he just tells me he wishes I was dead. Ok so now I'm gone. Make you're own damned noodles. I'm not comeing back till I'm damed good and ready.

posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 04:55 AM
OMG Im so sorry KSpigpen, I did the same thing to Greenize. I got involved in your stories. I didnt realize until to late that this was a writting contest. Please forgive me. I love your story so good luck. Mod please remove my posts.

posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 09:01 AM
reply to post by Magantice

You're alright, Mag. If it was some sort of contest, it's news to me. I just put it in short stories cuz I needed to vent a little bit. Your addition was good.
Almost as dark as I was feeling.

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