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What If the Apostles Ate Jesus - Would He Still Have Resurrected?

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posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:26 AM
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reply to post by fizzy1
 




Oh and on edit i wanted to add that how funny it would have been when john the baptist said one would come who would baptise with fire lol. What if everyone took him literally and thought of the messiah as torching everyone in the name of god. RUN FOR THE HILLS!! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES


Wow I never thought of that. So basically we could have ended up with a half skeleton, zombie, fire breathing Jesus. All I can say to that is JEESUSSS!

I would crap my pants.




posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:27 AM
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reply to post by fizzy1
 


Hey, God isn't without a sense of humor. Hell, he knew this conversation would happen and he created it, right?



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:28 AM
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reply to post by JayinAR
 


Well dont tell me I didnt write the book. Can you pray complaints to Jesus about the fact that His Father made stuff a little too complicated and now we think God is a Transformer.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:28 AM
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reply to post by grapesofraft
 

He traversed the heavens, and threaded every black hole in those three days, became a non-localized phenomenon, and then returned to his body, creating something new that had never existed before, and even after that he was humble, saying to the women "go tell your brothers that I ascend to my father, and to your father, to my God, and to your God."
Even then, he acknowledged the Godhead as one above himself - although in revelations, the distinction is removed when he says "I am the Alpha and the Omega" the first and the last.

Jesus Christ really IS processed food for our spiritual enjoyment, and the only way to "grok" him is to eat him, to appropriate and integrate, at the cellular level, because he is light and love, and the very essence and quintessence of the universe, it's cause and its destination. He is not to be worshipped as a separate entity, he is to be eaten, and entered into, as the mystery of the revelation of God's grace made manifest in human form.

What I see in this thread is "kid stuff".. grow up and eat the real thing.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:28 AM
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reply to post by grapesofraft
 


That actually sounds a lot like a South Park episode.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:31 AM
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reply to post by ablue07
 




How the heck could he resurrect if his body was in the stomachs of the Apostles?


Dude, I have no idea. That is what I am asking. So maybe when he resurrects it pulls the half digested pieces of flesh out of the Apostles stomach and then he can use it again. Its a tough call. Then you got all of the Apostles all starving because he sucked His flesh back out and they didnt eat the other stuff He had prepared for the last supper.

The whole thing is a quandry. Because if you think about it Jesus would have probably been pissed. He got this whole Last Supper thing going and had all of this food ready and they turn around and eat him instead. So all that work right down the drain.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:33 AM
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reply to post by grapesofraft
 


I'll try.
But maybe that is the point?

Hell, I won't try... I don't believe that crap anyhow. God is real.
Jesus is not God. Jesus was a great man who wanted to oust Roman occupancy in his homeland. Very admirable.

No matter how awesome he was, there is a 99.99999999% chance that he was not an incarnate of THE SUPREME DIETY ON EARTH.

If he was and I'm wrong I guess I'll go to hell, but guess what Christers? Not for as long as you think. An eye for an eye, remember that? I'll only be in hell for about 30 years, to this point... Then I'll join you guys and give you crap about this stuff all over again.

rambling... sorry



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:33 AM
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reply to post by OmegaPoint
 




What I see in this thread is "kid stuff".. grow up and eat the real thing.


Well I would but I am a vagitarian, but I guess for spirituality I could eat the real thing. So where do I get something like that.. at a Jewish Deli?



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:38 AM
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reply to post by OmegaPoint
 


"Kid's stuff?"

Look, I have followed your postings here with a keen eye since I first noticed your avatar and until this very moment I have enjoyed everything I've read.
However, what *I* see HERE is you using a completely speculative construct piled directly upon another entirely speculative construct as a platform to RIDICULE someone else who is merely having fun.

But I digress, this kind of sentiment actually speaks volumes of you when I put it together with someone who calls themselves the end point.

An enlightened person would just smile to themselves and move on.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:44 AM
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R.A. Heinlein answered this question. Anyone read Stranger in a Strange Land? Anyone remember how it ended?

After MVS was killed by the mob (spurred by TBTB) his friends had Michael soup. He forthwith made his appearance (though not corporeally).



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:46 AM
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reply to post by JayinAR
 


Thanks Jay. Couldnt have said it better myself.
I think she is just against the notion of a zombie jesus.



[edit on 8/6/2009 by grapesofraft]



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:46 AM
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reply to post by Phage
 


I haven't read it, but let me guess; He was given the choice how to return?



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:47 AM
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Well I just think that Jesus died for a meaning and a purpose, that we would be able to participate and be included in the same glory, the ultimate goal being to allow us to have a satisfying justice and remove the insult of the absurdity of the injustice of our life in history. There is a sacred seriousness to it - the end point being, so that we CAN laugh again, not at Jesus, but at ourselves and at the devil within, so that we, our true self, our better nature, can have the last laugh.

There is something very demeaning, and yes, very childish and not funny about this thread.

We should be making fun of the human being, and ourselves, and the absurd plight of man, finding problems where there are none and then getting all screwed up for no reason.

But this, this misses the point, unless the nature of the spiritual food being offered is understood, and "grokked" most fully.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:48 AM
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this is exactly the reason why i decided to ignore you here on this site for just this thread alone.....



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:49 AM
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reply to post by grapesofraft
 

No I've got it right, look it up and discover what it means and what the difference is. Don't assume.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:49 AM
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Originally posted by grapesofraft
reply to post by badmedia
 


With all due respect, you didnt debunk anything.. so why did he say I AM the way, the truth, and the light?

He is saying that without following him and being in relationship with him there is no way to get to the father and it makes total sense if you tie in other verses in the bible.


Because he symbolizes those things through his life, actions and teachings.

He fulfills the laws, and by doing such he brings understanding on the correct way, the correct life, and he shows the truth. Only by understanding can one keep the commandments(Psalm 111:10). And so he is that, does that etc.

Hey, you won't go wrong following him at all. That is the point of it. However, you are in error when you think that the father just forgot about everyone else and so forth. He even says so, remember it is the father within that does the works. That's the only problem. That is marketing thrown on top by the church.



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:50 AM
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Originally posted by JayinAR
reply to post by Phage
 


I haven't read it, but let me guess; He was given the choice how to return?


No.
Smith was not given a choice. He made a choice. It's a pretty good tale.

[edit on 8/6/2009 by Phage]



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:53 AM
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Originally posted by soldier8828
this is exactly the reason why i decided to ignore you here on this site for just this thread alone.....


Well in the forgiving spirit of Jesus I have turned the other cheek and made you my friend. WWZJD!



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:53 AM
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reply to post by OmegaPoint
 


The way I look at it is that Jesus and the Devil are precisely the same.
They are both constructs of the same plan.

This is the duality that pervades religion. And it shouldn't be that way.

Look, I promise you (at least from my perspective and once again if I'm wrong I'll roast in hell) Jesus himself would laugh at this joke.

"Jesus walks into a bar and throws three nails on the bar and asks the barkeep....

...

Can you put me up for the night?"


Horrible I know, but the fact is that all of this is in the plan anyhow? Why not have humor? God gave it to us, right?



posted on Aug, 6 2009 @ 12:54 AM
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reply to post by Phage
 


Yeah he returns as a voice in his friends head if I remember right and then later moves on to a higher spiritual plane.




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