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These Little Ones being born now are...missing something

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posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:11 PM
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reply to post by dgtempe
 


Take them and put them over your knee and blister their little behinds as hard as you can. Some kids are incapable of having sense without getting their butts whipped from time to time.




posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:17 PM
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reply to post by jackieps1975
 



Sounds like many of the children I know, unfortunately.


I was a District Manager for Tire Kingdom for years. One of my stores had a woman at the counter pricing work. Her two kids were running around terrorizing the other patrons and destroying our displays. People went outside to avoid them. The cashier politely asked her to get them, she turned and yelled their names and they did not slow down one bit. I watched for a couple of more minutes and then took action.

I walked over to the kids and barked, "come here, both of you!" They came to me, I took their hands and said let's go clean this up. They started to pull away, and I just said a firm NO. Their mother said excuse me, and I said no problem maam, I will be with you in a second, we are going to fix everything they tore up! We did exactly that. It took 5-10 mins and they were laughing by the end, but we put everything back together!

When we were finished, we walked over to the mother and I told them to hold her hands. They did. The mother was livid, she stared at me for the longest and then she said, "We're Leaving!" And I said, "I understand, have a nice day." When she walked out the door, the whole lobby applauded!!

Unfortunately, the store personnel would probably have gotten complaints and disciplinary action for what I did, but my rank allowed me to handle it that way!



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:20 PM
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There are children born without guilt/conscience.

However - there are also parent(s) who indulge their children out of guilt. I'm not talking about material indulging.

A parent has to be a parent - - not a friend.

Taking young children to a psychiatrist - - is almost like you are giving them license to have severe behavioral problems.

I am not diminishing psychiatry - - - this is about the parents behavior and acceptance of the child's behavior.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:26 PM
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If a child broke my car windshield he would not be able to sit on his butt for a few days because I would have given him a real butt whipping.

Spare the rod and spoil the child.

Also it's very important to spend lots of quality time with children.

My son is 40 and my daughter is 35. I could not ask for them to have turned out to be any better as adults. They are my pride and joy.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:33 PM
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Very interesting read.

I believe sincerely that those kids are the future.
And what a wonderful future.
They are free and they are showing it to the ones that most try to trap them at the moment how free they are.

Little revolutionaries. We are needing them in this society structured upon fear.
Seems like they came into this world knowing well their mission.

They are not evil, they are just more evolved.



edit: Sadly enough, everyone in this thread seems to be promoting the idea of putting more effort in trying to trap them and take away their freedom. Don't start punishing and rewarding them. That's just crap. Teach them! Tell them whats going on and what they can do about it! All they need is focused attention. They are like little energy things bouncing all over. Don't take away all their potential.

[edit on 4-8-2009 by Geladinhu]



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:36 PM
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Have you ever watched the Super Nanny?
Check out some episodes, there can be a lot to learn.
I can realy recommend it seeing how other parents mess up and how some professional tips can do wonders in no time







[edit on 4-8-2009 by jaamaan]



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:40 PM
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Originally posted by dizziedame
If a child broke my car windshield he would not be able to sit on his butt for a few days because I would have given him a real butt whipping.

Spare the rod and spoil the child.



The judicious application of a belt is no longer a tool in a parent's arsenal. As much as it sounds like the kids in the OP need a good thrashing, you simply can't do things that way anymore. Beating a kid is a means to an end- the end being that the kid knows his place in the scheme of things, and challenging that has consequences. There are many ways to put a child in his or her place that does not involve physically overpowering them- it's just more difficult, and requires more finesse. Physical violence is the last resort of the unimaginative.

To discipline a child, you have to know what's important to them, and then remove that from them when they engage in unacceptable behavior. Be firm, and consistent, and patient, and eventually you will see results. You have to be willing to be "the bad guy", and do things that you know will make the child unhappy and angry with you in the short term, in order to shape them into responsible, reasonable people.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:47 PM
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reply to post by dgtempe
 


Sorry to hear this DG. I know it's hard. The best I can advice I can give is to find the 'thing' that makes them suffer to get their attention.

By that, I mean not one type of punishment works for all children. For instance, spanking my son doesn't faze him. But when I take away his stuff or put him in time out, he turns into an angel. For my step-daughter, spanking worked and time outs did nothing. For my step-son, it was so bad we had to send him to rehab for a year to get him to really turn it around.

What you do need to do is get it in gear now. If gentle talks aren't working, then change the strategy. If spankings aren't working, then change the strategy. What is your course of typical disciplinary action? What other forms have you tried?

When it comes to the windshield example, I'd take his most prized possessions and sell it to pay for the car. Now that he lost his stuff and not just demolished someone else's stuff, he'll know how it feels and that his careless actions have consequences.

If they're as bad as they seem, it's time to get really proactive. Mix it with love, but get proactive. You don't want these ways to still be ingrained when they're 30.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 03:57 PM
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From what you described to me is sounds like both children are sociopaths. There are tests that can be done.
Talk to their doctor and confirm. There are parents out there who are also dealing with the same problem and have found success.


Profile of the Sociopath

This website summarizes some of the common features of descriptions of the behavior of sociopaths.


* Glibness and Superficial Charm

* Manipulative and Conning
They never recognize the rights of others and see their self-serving behaviors as permissible. They appear to be charming, yet are covertly hostile and domineering, seeing their victim as merely an instrument to be used. They may dominate and humiliate their victims.

* Grandiose Sense of Self
Feels entitled to certain things as "their right."

* Pathological Lying
Has no problem lying coolly and easily and it is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. Can create, and get caught up in, a complex belief about their own powers and abilities. Extremely convincing and even able to pass lie detector tests.

* Lack of Remorse, Shame or Guilt
A deep seated rage, which is split off and repressed, is at their core. Does not see others around them as people, but only as targets and opportunities. Instead of friends, they have victims and accomplices who end up as victims. The end always justifies the means and they let nothing stand in their way.

* Shallow Emotions
When they show what seems to be warmth, joy, love and compassion it is more feigned than experienced and serves an ulterior motive. Outraged by insignificant matters, yet remaining unmoved and cold by what would upset a normal person. Since they are not genuine, neither are their promises.

* Incapacity for Love

* Need for Stimulation
Living on the edge. Verbal outbursts and physical punishments are normal. Promiscuity and gambling are common.

* Callousness/Lack of Empathy
Unable to empathize with the pain of their victims, having only contempt for others' feelings of distress and readily taking advantage of them.

* Poor Behavioral Controls/Impulsive Nature
Rage and abuse, alternating with small expressions of love and approval produce an addictive cycle for abuser and abused, as well as creating hopelessness in the victim. Believe they are all-powerful, all-knowing, entitled to every wish, no sense of personal boundaries, no concern for their impact on others.

* Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency
Usually has a history of behavioral and academic difficulties, yet "gets by" by conning others. Problems in making and keeping friends; aberrant behaviors such as cruelty to people or animals, stealing, etc.

* Irresponsibility/Unreliability
Not concerned about wrecking others' lives and dreams. Oblivious or indifferent to the devastation they cause. Does not accept blame themselves, but blames others, even for acts they obviously committed.

* Promiscuous Sexual Behavior/Infidelity
Promiscuity, child sexual abuse, rape and sexual acting out of all sorts.

* Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle
Tends to move around a lot or makes all encompassing promises for the future, poor work ethic but exploits others effectively.

* Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility
Changes their image as needed to avoid prosecution. Changes life story readily.
Source



The sociopathic child

The sad truth about sociopaths is that the temperamental traits that lead to this character disorder are mostly genetic. This means the child of a sociopath may inherit a predisposition for the disorder. It also means a sociopathic child can be born into a normal, loving family.

Dr. Liane Leedom, author of Just Like His Father?, believes that although a child with a sociopathic biological parent may have a genetic connection to the disorder, parenting and the environment have a role in determining if the antisocial personality fully develops. To prevent a child from becoming a sociopath, she says, intervention must begin while the child is young-certainly before puberty.
If you have had a child with a sociopath, Lovefraud strongly recommends that you read Just Like His Father? - A Guide to Overcoming Your Child's Genetic Connection to Antisocial Behavior, Addiction & ADHD.

Many people do not want to label a child as a sociopath. In fact, the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fourth Edition (DSM-IV), as presented by BehaveNet®, states that an individual must be at least 18 years of age to be diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder.

But Dr. Robert Hare and his colleagues, Drs. Adelle Forth and David Kosson, have developed the Hare Psychopathy Checklist: Youth Version. This assessment tool, which must be administered by a trained clinician, measures antisocial traits in youths aged 12 to 18. Other experts say that the symptoms can be seen in much younger children.

What are the signs? Some experts point to three main indicators—cruelty toward animals, fire setting, and longer than normal bedwetting. Lying, defiance, theft, bullying, truancy, early experimentation with sex, and vandalism are more symptoms.

Here is the heartbreaking reality: If you have a sociopathic child, unless intervention was started while the child was young, there may be very little you can do about it.
Source

Hope this helps your son, and you.

Rhain



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:00 PM
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I have a grandson that was like that.
He did something close to that with my truck.

He could not tell where my foot ended and his ass started and found
how to get some very big stacks of wood piled up in 100 degree weather.
Had to dig some post holes for a fence in the yard.
And the driveway need to be scrubbed.
No more meds, head doctors, and he can finally have a soda without being a jackass for hours.
Something I did notice on the sugar thing. We would tell him something was sugar free and it was loaded with it. It did not make him act different.
The meds were like being stoned on weed. Too lazy to want to do anything. If he did not take them and was what I call "normal feeling", he would go ape on us.

He seems like a real nice kid now a couple of years later..............



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:08 PM
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I agree that taking away favorite toys for a long time would be the best punishment for the boy.

You mentioned the boy is 9 years old, and that is old enough to be getting paid allowance for doing some chores.

Increase the list of chores and take away the allowance, to help pay for the broken windows. Make sure he has something productive to do from sunrise to sunset, except for the days he has school.

Also, I hope your son was not crying on the floor in front of the children. If he was, then that let the boy know he won. Never, ever let a child know they have the upper hand.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:10 PM
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reply to post by moonwilson
 



Physical violence is the last resort of the unimaginative.


NO. Physical consequences are very real in every day society. Step in the road, get hit by bus, deadly physical consequence! Step in the road, get swatted on behind and snatched back = real physical consequence without any long-term damage!!

Effectively using nature's laws is not abuse. There is certainly a need for finesse in application of any punishment. Locked in closet for hours, or denied social involvement, or missing an important birthday party are all far more damaging than a quick swat on the behind, or a smack on the hand, or even a quick tap on the mouth!

Don't beat your kids. Don't lock them up. Don't deny them in interaction or love. BUT do whatever punishment is appropriate and fits into Nature's model!

If a cabinet door will smash a finger, maybe you should smack a hand to give them a less severe sample of the "Natural Consequence" of their action.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:21 PM
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I was spanked when I was little and turned out just fine. So I would say especially for breaking something important like that they need a major league spanking. At least the nine year old needs a belt then maybe some therapy but probably just more spanking. There's a good rule to follow in the bible. It goes "Spare the rod spoil the child." You may not be a believer if not that's okay. You wanna give em something to think about though just tell them in the Old Testament children were stoned to death for disobeying. I don't advise that of course but maybe they need a little fear to straighten up.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:25 PM
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reply to post by Beach Bum
 



So I would say especially for breaking something important like that they need a major league spanking.


Very possibly, but, if he has been beaten on his whole life, then it may not be effective. Maybe he needs to help fix the window. Or be put into hard labor to earn the cost of the repair. Or maybe even tit for tat, go to his room and break something of his.

No two kids are alike, but something will work on this kid. The most important thing is making sure that he knows you love him, and that the punishment is appropriate to the bad deed, and that it becomes a "teaching" experience. Punishment just for the sake of revenge or anger won't work.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:27 PM
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Oh man. Have I got some advice for you guys.

Coming from the "bad child" (that's right, I was a bad kid).
When I was about 3 years old, I busted out my window in my bedroom, and threw all my toys outside. Why? Because I was spoiled and didn't want to share.
What happened? My dad lit my a$$ on fire. Not literally, he took his belt off and I got it good. Never broke another window in my life. (not on purpose at least)

Growing up, I was a bit destructive. Anytime I broke something of my parents, they took my favorite toy and turned it to dust. I stopped breaking things pretty quick.

In my teens, I ran away all the time. I got into fights, and was going down a path of self destruction. Then my dad married the biggest bitch I have ever met in my life. She used to punish me by making me wash the walls from top to bottom, run the vacuum, pull the weeds out of the rosebushes. She'd make me do every chore in that house. When I would complain about being bored, or being unhappy about something, I had to write a two page front and back report about why I wasn't happy, and what I thought should be done about it. Then if she didn't like it, I had to rewrite it until she was satisfied. You know what? About two years of her bull# and I did a total 180. Stopped wearing all black, traded it in for nice clothes with a little color. Stopped fighting in school. Stopped pretty much all the destructive crap that I had been doing. I went into therapy, and was told I was bipolar. YES, I'M ONE OF THEM BIPOLAR PEOPLE.

She eventually helped me cope with everything, and got me to become a better, well rounded person. Even though she was tuff as nails with me, she always told me she loved me, and it was for my own good. I see now that she meant it. I'm glad she did what she did, because I could have turned out to be one hellacious little bad ass.

My advice is: TUFF LOVE. Stop letting those kids walk all over you. Put your foot down. Get creative. It might feel like you are being cruel, but you know what....sometimes it's necessary. You aren't dealing with a disobediant dog, you are dealing with children. You need to step up and do what needs to be done to save them from their self destructive ways. WHOOP THEM. I have two kids, I'm not afraid to whoop them if they step out of line.

Best of luck to you.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:31 PM
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They need a good slap.

Kid's with hate are kid's with problems make no mistake. But at some point in time they might have been treated too soft or maybe spoiled.

Yep few slap's on the arse and no pocket money should cure it.

Why on earth you would put kid's on medication is way beyond me unless they have a cough or a cold.

I edited my post to add that i have three children myself and there fine.

Two of them are around the age you mentioned and the idea of me giving them med's to control them well i would consider that child abuse.

Infact im shure i have seen it in many dystopian movie's i think you need to get those kid's off med's please ?

Take care.

Regards
Lee






[edit on 4-8-2009 by h3akalee]



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:34 PM
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reply to post by h3akalee
 


Good point about the meds. Unless it's a serious medical condition, I don't like the idea of putting kids on meds either. there are other ways to deal with them. I think meds make some kids act out even more.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 04:44 PM
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Originally posted by Helig
If meds and mental health professionals cannot help them unfortunately I suspect they are beyond the scope of being handled by normal people. Turning them over to the state might be the only reasonable choice if you really do feel they are doing more harm than good remaining in the custody of your son. No amount of one-sided love is worth running one self into the ground over, just keep that in mind.


WHAT?!??!??

FOUR WORDS:

BEAT THEIR LITTLE ASSES!

I have 5, (YES FIVE) chiildren. Two are grown, one in comm college and a good job, the other in the military, my youngest three are well behaved to an extent. Yes they give their mother & I problems, but if my kids broke my car windsshield intentionally someone's ass would be tan.

All the whiny, liberal, "they just arent; loved" makes me SICK. I HAVE SUCCESSFULLY RAISED TWO SO I KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

It is yes-sir, no-sir, good grades, chores, and I reward them when they do what they should.

Get a grip and be a man/woman. YOU are the boss. Trust me, they WILL appreciate it.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 06:17 PM
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Just to clear a few things:

The mother is not allowed near the children and lives in another state- My son wanted full custody and he got it.

Looking at this from the outside, yes, i could say swat the hell out of them, punish them, take away everything. NEWSFLASH: Everything has been taken away from them; every game, every doll, television, etc.
Also my son has taken to beating their little asses. Its not working.

They seem to be getting worse with time.

This is the most difficult case i have ever seen, to be honest with all of you, and i appreciate your suggestions, keeping in mind all that has already been tried and done with them.

Thsnks for the suggestions.



posted on Aug, 4 2009 @ 06:19 PM
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reply to post by MajesticJax
 


I totally agree. Thats how i raised mine.



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