Traits of an Empath: Descriptions and Discussion

The one gift I wish for but do NOT have is the gift of Healing.

reply to post by ogbert


Thank you for your kind words. I agree hate is a strong word. It's a strong emotion too.
I don't use the word lightly though. I only say it when I mean it.

I have been in counseling and am on several medications. Last summer I went through shock therapy too. After 4 months of it, I lost most of my memories of the summer as well as how to do my job. I did feel better for a while I think. At least people told me I seemed more cheerful, lol. I have to take their word for it.

Bottom line though... even the most friendly dog if kicked long enough will turn.
And though I appreciate everything you said, it's too late for me now.

Please don't tell me it's not, even if you believe that. Just know that you did make me smile a little. But you'll never convince me otherwise.

reply to post by voudew


search willbe on utube. His song forever should help you greatly.

reply to post by Angus123


you said "I so wish there was a drug I could take that would erase all traces of emotion from me. People have told me that it would be terrible, and that I'd never feel happy.
"

Relating to that i assumed that you had not tried them. So you "drug" me in on that one.

I hope you find your way. I hate to see suffering. But you have to want to change; and, you have to be honest with yourself. Also, instead of looking at things as far as what life is doing to you; maybe, you would feel a little better taking responsibility and learning from it. No one can do it for you. You remind me of that part in "As Good as it Gets" where Jack Nicholson walks into the doctor's office and asks everyone, "what if this is as good as it gets?" Personally, i don't believe this. But oh i have been in those downward spirals before, afraid to say it can't get no worse in fear that somehow it would.

good luck, i appreciate your comments. you seem kind. life is a trip. if ya can't see the bright side polish the dull. ''








[edit on 22-7-2009 by ogbert]

[edit on 22-7-2009 by ogbert]

reply to post by jackieps1975


Interesting.
I have been wondering the exact same.
The last two days for me were extremely weird for me (sharp headaches and abnormal lazyness/tiredness).
I was also following TWZ and realized we are currently in a big dip or "change".
The solar eclipse is also something that may be related.

But sometimes I think all that I feel is just psychological? Maybe I'm susceptible to suggestions without even realizing so and my subconscious produces effects on my conscious because of previous information gathered? I don't know.

Perhaps this may shed a little light on some of the very painful experiences as an empath - the only way I can do it is to share some of my own experiences and how I came to grips with all the emotional inputs -from myself and others. This emotional side very much relates to being an empath and I'll explain why.

I'm very emotional, always has been, but I had a wakeup call years ago when somebody I respected quite a bit told me that I had a good brain, but I'm not using it at all - I make all my decisions based on my emotions. So I made a very conscious decision not to do that any more. It took some practice, but everytime I had a strong emotion, I'd ask myself do I have all the facts, is there another way of looking at it, is it relevant to me, or is it the other person's problem?. I had to teach myself to consciously discern what is applicable to me and to work with that. I've been given a heart AND a brain and I need to use both.

So, being an empath, how do I deal with other people agendas, malice, spite, abuse? I consciously remind myself that we all have a shadow or dark side, and a lot of people hadn't taken the the time to deal wth their own issues, the reasons for their anger and own insecurities, and sometimes they simply don't know how to do that. So, if I can, I would simply refuse to entertain or engage with their feelings if negative, it passes right by me. And sometimes, when it is necessary, I let the person simply pass me by. But I try to do it without judgement because we have all been there at some point in our lives we we simply act out our unresolved feelings, and sometimes it aint pretty I'm often more amused at how obvious other people are, and that they are underestimating my intelligence so much. It is a quiet litttle smile I allow myself..

As time went by, I got better at it. But there is one other thing that I noticed. If I'm in a painful place, or deal with a very emotional issue, I resonate a hundred times stronger with the emotions coming off from the other person; it amplifies and and grows completely out of proportion; then it is very difficult to clean up. So I have learned that whenever someone produces a very painful feeling in me, I look at myself first to try and identify what produces the painful feeling in me: what is this person triggering in me, why am I resonating with it? It's like a frequency that we're dialled into. Usually I can find the trigger in me, and becomes yet one more previously hidden issue in myself that I didn't know existed. When I deal with my issues first it becomes easier to deal with whatever pain is outside of me. So, basically in a nutshell what I'm trying to say is that being an empath makes one extremely sensitive to emotions, others' but but our own as well, and if one mixes and combine the two, it becomes unbearable. If you clean up your own pain, it greatly enables you to function wthout getting sucked up in others' issues.

The flip side of being an empath, the really cool side, is that it makes you sensitive to other people's problems and pain and if you see your way clear, you can truly help to make this world a better and less painful place. The ability to understand people and their agendas enables you to see where they are stuck in their understanding and how confused people simply are. And perhaps you have something to contribute - a little clarity perhaps or just an ear?

reply to post by ogbert


Hey, thanks for the advice...
And ya donuts shops and quick stops are nice refreshers

I am also trying to catch up on all the posts here, right now im just swamped... Got myself into a sticky situation partying with friends and now im the center of all the talk at work and amongst my friends, not to mention the fact that in the last 2 years no one i work with has heard me yell, and i yelled at someone a few nights ago, so they are even more shocked and just waiting to see what i do next... Can't wait to get back under the radar. Capain Morgan is a very bad man, and makes me do stupid sh*t. lol

Anyway, i also just wanted to bring up the topic of Reiki, to anyone that doesn't know its a form of spiritual healing, and helps me out big time when everything is spiraling out of control. When i can't write, and music isn't helping me, this takes care of everything and puts me right back to where i think all of us here like to be, and thats feeling that we r back in a happy balance again.

Also, just curious if any other empaths experiances this, has your life, in the general view, seem unusually simple or easy in comparison to others, like your friends and family. As i think back on my short life i can't help but notice that everythign kinda just flows for me, school, work, everything just kinda drifts along going smoothly. And alot of the time i see myself just watching other people, especially at parties, where people are just havign fun, kinda brings a warm feeling, ya know? The only times i can recall that are bad would be the times when i have been forced into doing things, or trying to make people see what they are f*cking up in their own lives...

Originally posted by Wertdagf
empathy is being able to pick up on subtle variation in behavior that relate to inner fellings and thoughts being processed.

Thats all it is.... nothing magical, only logical. You damn kids are ruining everything with you magic bull%^&$.

Thank god someone finally pointed this out. I have read the threads and started to believe I was an empath. I'm a sensitive individual and have learned to become more empathetic as Ive grown. Through some tough life situations Ive been forced to be more empathetic to help understand my own situation. In many ways it's a survival tool. By calling yourselves Empaths you are looking for a box to put yourself in and maybe in the process alienating yourselves from others

I dont put myself in any such box, an empath can mean so much and has a pretty wide spectrum of abilities etc, as a study once stated the majority of people are actually empathic in one sense or another, what is different between people is their level of ability and strength of their gift/emotions.

i don't go through life saying hey im an empath im special, i run my life with pretty much normality seeing as i have a household to run and 5 kids to run around after, The only difference being is that im more open to other peoples emotional states amongst other things as my abilities are perhaps a little stronger than some here (as i stated earlier in thread im a precog amongst other things). im not special in any way, shape nor form, i dont shout it from the roof tops and say hey i can do this , this and this LOOK AT ME.

Putting labels on things may grate some people but it also helps others who struggle to learn, cope and understand why they are the way they are, giving it a name helps them to comprehend there feelings/ideas/influences and gifts.

I understand that some people put down their nose at such things, to me it seems that at least some of them lack understanding. We are not claiming to be god, indigo, star-child, the next coming, Jesus, alien, special or whatever other label anyone can come up with All this is, is one place were both people who are curious, need help understanding their emotions and abilities can come to seek advice on ways to cope, seek like minded people for understanding or just to ask questions and share experiences. That is all.

Not one person in this thread has claimed that they are above others, special, have mystic magical powers blah blah blah , the only people who have stated such a thing has been people who have come into this thread and down cried it, and perhaps misinterpreting what this thread has been about.

Originally posted by paxnatus

Originally posted by andrewh7
I think we need to come up with a definitive label for these kinds of threads because they are posted over and over again. Allow me to summarize:

1. OP appeals to outsider, social phobics by dropping personality traits that would describe the vast majority of this population, or, quite possibly almost everyone on earth.

2. Rather than flaws, OP insists they are merely objective symptoms of a thread reader's special and rare gift or status, e.g., having latent superpowers or being an alien.

3. Based solely on the satisfaction of the OP's own test or symptom checklist, thread reader enthusiastically claims to be a member of this rare class of persons.

4. Thread reader eagerly describes personal anecdotes or behavioral tendencies that are consistent with the OP's checklist.

5. Thread readers states, "I knew I was different from most people but until your thread came along, I just couldn't figure out how. It's good to know that I'm not alone."

6. Thread reader describes the unfortunate but inevitable consequences of having the superpowers - the burden they must carry but nonetheless welcome in the service of a greater good.

7. OP congratulates thread leader on making the discovery, suggesting what a powerful and positive effect the reader can have on the world with advantages that put him or her above the limitations of most human beings.

8. Thread loses attention/popularity

9. New thread created with different superpower. See Step 1.

I suggest we nickname these threads the Peter Parker Threads, since Peter Parker was the textbook-definition nerd who got powers and redeemed himself completely.



[edit on 17-7-2009 by andrewh7]

Hello,
what is your point here? Why so angry? If it is just more of the same then why did you bother to read it? Are we offending you some how?

Let me be clear, if we have offended you, that is your issue to work out, not mine or anyone else's. No one has said anything offensive at all. So that begs the question, why you?

You must be a great empath seeing as I was neither angry nor offended while writing my comment. The only thing that I was feeling was extraordinarily disappointed that these repetitive Peter Parker threads thrive in spite of the fact that one can predict their eventual course before the first response has even been posted.

Your response sounds more like child's whining that I ruined is absurd little game. If you are so offended by constructive criticism, writing in a pubic discussion forum seems to be a dumb idea.

Please explain how I could possibly claim this thread is "more of the same" without actually reading the thread first. Also, take note of the fact that you failed to challenge any of my observations as being incorrect.

[edit on 24-7-2009 by andrewh7]

reply to post by jackieps1975


I loved your dog story... and share your love of dogs.. well all animals really

Its funny you know.,, but lately, I am starting to think that Im developing the ability to 'see' spirits. I swear there is a spirit/ghost hanging around in the health food section of the supermarket where I frequent. I have this annoying habit of standing in supermarkets or shops and staring at product... I have decided that it puts me in this weird kind of trance (I realise how strange this all sounds).... but I cant seem to help it,.. and some days I stand and stare longer than at others times...

This particular day... I was staring at the stationary (thats pens!) section.. and I felt somebody coming up to my left... I looked slightly to the left. and saw a movement... so I moved out the way... but then looked up again to find there was nobody there ...

I thought nothing of it... but then it happened again and again... and I swear it has now happened 3 times...The second time... I saw a 'form' standing behind me... but when I turned to move out of the way... there was nobody there..

The reason I find this so strange is because 'usually' I hear and feel spirits/ghosts (or whatever they are)... but I never actually 'see' anything in broad daylight..,, with my eyes open...

I went back there this afternoon to 'case' it out.... but nope... there was nothing...

I find that I am 'onto' people within a few minutes of meeting them... but I seem to have this way of 'ignoring' the bad, evil., or dishonesty in them.... I egnor it so well, to the point where I forget it is even there.... and this unfortunately has gotten me into a few spots Id rather not have been in..

I guess it feels better this way because I would rather be in denial that most people's hearts have gone a bit astray.. it helps me see only the good in them.... and this makes life easier to handle.... until they 'strike!'... and I do believe that I have become a lot better at getting out of the firing line just at the right time!

reply to post by andrewh7


The fact that you have come back to a thread that you've already deemed to have no worth betrays you.
Let's say you are right! and we are just a bunch of social phobics looking to connect. What does that say about you, that you would try and upset that?
You see your points would carry more weight if you had started a new thread instead you posted it here, in front of us.
The fact that you did that proves that you are just looking to annoy rather than inform IMO.

reply to post by andrewh7

oops! i think you wondered into the wrong classroom. You were looking for the one where you have to write within the little squares and make really long pretentious lists. I know you really want to be the milk monitor, but we are not concerned with that over here at the moment. They wouldn't let us have any sharp pencils over here, but wev'e got some nice crayons and were colorin all over the the ceilings with them. so, be a good kid would ya and run on over to a space where they appreciate staying within the squares? Don't want to waste my breath, but if you read the thread, you might come to the conclusion that your views may not be appreciated over here.

your critisizm reveals a hollow sense of being and a lack of humility. who ya gonna call? ghostbusters? where's yo scruple?

ok. so go back across the hall and write the following sentence 50 times and say your sorry.

I had no scruples about blasting into the forum and dissing the OP. I will refrain from trying to impress others from a position of greater importance than I actually possess.

"1. OP appeals to outsider, social phobics by dropping personality traits that would describe the vast majority of this population, or, quite possibly almost everyone on earth. "

If the personality trait is universal, then why would it appeal to outsiders and not conformists?



2. Rather than flaws, OP insists they are merely objective symptoms of a thread reader's special and rare gift or status, e.g., having latent superpowers or being an alien.

Where is the flaw in human compassion or a desire or talent of understanding others in this chaotic world? Again, if everyone possess the traits. Objective? Empathy is a subjective experience. Alien may be a good metaphor, the way that people who try to extend themselves in kindness are rebuked by the normal people like you.

objective |əbˈjektiv|
adjective
1 (of a person or their judgment) not influenced by personal feelings or opinions in considering and representing facts : historians try to be objective and impartial. Contrasted with subjective .
• not dependent on the mind for existence; actual : a matter of objective fact.


3. Based solely on the satisfaction of the OP's own test or symptom checklist, thread reader enthusiastically claims to be a member of this rare class of persons.

Enthusiastic thread readers have added to Op's checklist in many ways.

4. Thread reader eagerly describes personal anecdotes or behavioral tendencies that are consistent with the OP's checklist.

I guess that was the point in the thread. Humans naturally flock to those of a similar thought pattern and eagerly share experiences. it's called rapport.

5. Thread readers states, "I knew I was different from most people but until your thread came along, I just couldn't figure out how. It's good to know that I'm not alone."

I guess that was the point in the thread. Humans naturally flock to those of a similar thought pattern and eagerly share experiences. it's called rapport.

6. Thread reader describes the unfortunate but inevitable consequences of having the superpowers - the burden they must carry but nonetheless welcome in the service of a greater good.

People once suffered form polio. A bunch of doctors got together and enthusiastically observed the traits and found a cure. Before they started collaborating, it was thought that demons were responsible.

7. OP congratulates thread leader on making the discovery, suggesting what a powerful and positive effect the reader can have on the world with advantages that put him or her above the limitations of most human beings.

Yeah. If everyone really cared about others, instead of being Darwinist; maybe the world would be a little safer. We need some better role models than we have at the present. live and let live vs live and let die?


8. Thread loses attention/popularity

Show me one that hasn't.

9. New thread created with different superpower. See Step 1.

I do not think superpower was inferred. Anyone can sing. However, obviously some have a natural knack for it. Some have invested a huge amount of time developing the talent. And, some at least try. Some take the attitude everyone can sing, so, what's so special about it. Some can be brought to tears by a good singer.


I suggest we nickname these threads the Peter Parker Threads, since Peter Parker was the textbook-definition nerd who got powers and redeemed himself completely.

Wasn't Peter Parker's (Spiderman) superpowers derived from technological inventions?

i suggest that you participate in the threads that interest you.

Hello everyone! I'm throwing some positive energy sprinkles out into the universe....so hopefully we will all have a great weekend! (I just always feel better on a Friday)

I don't want to waste alot of time responding to the db's who like to come to this thread and spew negativity so I will simply say this....
Take the time to read through the thread. We are simply coming together under common elements and sharing our thoughts, experiences, & perceptions. No one here has made *amazing* proclamations or any such silliness. Nor are we isolating ourselves and adhering to a label, quite contrary. It's actually quite refreshing to see a group of individuals sincerely trying to help eachother.

I wanted to ask you guys if you notice that certain behaviors seem to irritate you immensely. For example, I have this thing with manners. I really feel it's the cornerstone of human consideration. Very basic stuff here. When people don't say "thank you", I take extreme offense. Often to the point where I might actually say something to them. There is a lack of respect and humanity that has been spreading for years.

The breakdown of basic courtesy is very disturbing to me. You can go into almost any public place and see how things are deteriorating, just by the mannerisms of people. What concerns me most Now granted, there are many lovely individuals, but again, this appears to be the exception and not the rule.

The reason why I bring this up is that I know we pick up on the subtleties much more than most. I find that when I notice such things, the general indifference and apathy of the public, it resonates within me as something frightening and something we need to be acutely aware of in times to come. Particularly this sense of entitlement we see in our society. People don't want to take responsibility for themselves. They've been bred to blame others and make excuses for ill behavior. It really burns me up (and freaks me out). With a crumbling society lacking a conscience and a basically manevolent government.....I spend alot of time worrying about the coming years

This thread has been interesting ..see to me it dosen't mean bugger all to me what people think..and I refuse to feed the Trolls..lol

My insight into people and has been proved to me over time!! no ego or vested interests..to sway or massage an ego..I see what is..

Aye !! manners lol thats a big thing with me!lol sadly lacking a lot these days!..

I think that when people come on and try to denegrate others ..I just sense inadiquacies..

But each to their own!lol Let them get on with it..I know from questioning analysing things what is true for me..

Some people push out negativity..its what some people do..and bless them lol..they just show me a different perspective ..but I know what is true..

And the cry goes out!!.."wheres your evidence" "prove it"

I say prove its not bull#!

I worked as a nurse as formentioned..I could sense when a patient was ill or was going to die just by standing and looking..even though their obs (vital signs...BP, pulse, temp and sats)..were fine..

Being able to calm some of the most psychotic aggressive patients down just to get them to calm down enough so they didn't assault staff, jump through the nearest window or throw something...and that was over a long period of time of time...

Can I prove it...no I can't !!I just know that I could sense what was going on with that person..

I live in a practical world my trade is practical..I like things to be logical..
So for a long time its been an internal argument with what I sense..and what should logically happen...

Now ..I just get on with it ..Like ogbert said some can sing but some are good at it..

I think its just a natural thing ..we all have things we are good at!!

And if you have tested yourself (objectivley/subjectively) without ego!!..you know what is true..

So for me seeing the debunkers denigrators have a go ..I say ...go for it!!lol

I know what I know! lol

well many times over the years i have heard the cry of prove it, and to be honest i could if i chose to. BUT i choose not to, why? i have nothing to prove to anyone, in this life nor the next. People can choose to belive me or dont, it doesn't really bother me either way to be honest

reply to post by ronishia


I never tied to prove to anyone..the only one I had to prove it to was myself!!

In fact I have done everything to keep it hidden ..like any situation ..I always try to give a BS logical explanation!..and most people swallow it!!because they want facts to fit in their logical worlds..so I let them get on with it!!

Can't do with the airy fairy types either that talk as if they have some gift or are special,,(I always think ther is something lacking lol) and think they are above and know the answers..they don't..and I know even less..in fact bugger all!!

But each to their own!!

I believe it a natural instinct that is all but lost...this empath thing is what has got humans this far sensing things ..there was a time we relied on it ...its a survival instinct..to sense danger and nurture and care!!..we evolved because of it!

Originally posted by jackieps1975


I wanted to ask you guys if you notice that certain behaviors seem to irritate you immensely. For example, I have this thing with manners. I really feel it's the cornerstone of human consideration. Very basic stuff here. When people don't say "thank you", I take extreme offense. Often to the point where I might actually say something to them. There is a lack of respect and humanity that has been spreading for years.

Yes... people dont say 'thank-you' properly.. and sometimes they dont even say it at all... I notice this all the time... I have found that there is no point in saying anything.. but just teach by example... If you 'thank' somebody properly,,, perhaps there will be 'one' person watching, listening.. and that person may take it on board... you never know

..... and and lol

I have noticed that people treat shop assistants with disrespect... I mean... working in the supermarket, etc must be so boring (the poor things)... and so I genuinly ask them how they are every time I go in there... even if I am having the 'worse' day and want to go and crawl in a hole,,, because it really makes a difference to them... you can see when you ask.,. they actually respond, and seem a bit happier