What Has Happened To The TRUE Friend?

I love them all no less today than I did then. But we change and the reasons friendships happen are sometimes based on a lesson or experience in my mind. I don't believe that once you love someone, connect with someone, that it ever goes away. They may not be in your life as a current issue, but they touched you none the less. Letting friends go, the loss can be looked at in a positive way, is sometimes being a true friend. It makes room for them to go on and discover new things. But if you see them again, it is as if no time has passed. True friendship never ends.
I don't see why people have to "possess" their friends to feel they are their friends. I let mine have freedom, and when they need me I suppose they will call. I would hope so anyway. Some people are not good for you and you must move on. They hold you back in patterns you need to get away from. But it doesn't mean you have to not care about them.

I have five of the best friends that one could ever hope for. Sometimes we don't get to see as much of each other due to schedule but, we catch up just fine.

If you go into life expecting party friends or whatever to be there for you though you are going to be disappointed. At times it takes a while to know the difference between friends and acquaintances.

reply to post by dgtempe


dgtempe please don't give up the inner hope that exists inside you, every human on earth suffers in some fashion while oblivious to real sufferings of other humans. Do not use other folks and the normal human companionship to dictate how you feel. You are not alone, this is a form of suffering or a temporary oscillation of suffering as it appears to you. Just be strong and forget about the missing connection of verbal communication or empathy. You will be soon set free...

My very best friend, Judy died at 20 from ovarian cancer.

She was one year older than me and wore a cowboy hat and drove a white Lincoln Continental her adoptive parents bought her for her sixteenth birthday.

Generous, no airs, just plain Judy.

I was a hippy and loved rock.

Judy was a cowgirl (before it became fashionable) and loved country.

Judy by virtue of the fact that she was really rich and beautiful could have any of the "cool girls" in highschool as a friend. They all clamored for her attention and favor.

But, Judy for some reason chose me as her best friend and constant companion.

Judy was the sweetest and most wonderful person and left this ball of dirt way too soon.

I wish I had known we would only have had such a short time together, I would have should have been a better friend. But we were young and thought we had all the days of our lives yet to unfold.

I saw us growing old and our kids playing together.

Sitting on a porch laughing at all the stupid, childish antics we pulled together in our youth.

Secrets between us kept that nobody else would ever know.

But, that time never came.

Why can't we get all the people together in the world that we really like and then just stay together? I guess that wouldn't work. Someone would leave. Someone always leaves. Then we would have to say good-bye. I hate good-byes. I know what I need. I need more hellos. ~Charles M. Schulz

Absence from whom we love is worse than death, and frustrates hope severer than despair. ~William Cowper

Happy trails to you, until we meet again.
Some trails are happy ones,
Others are blue.
It's the way you ride the trail that counts,
Here's a happy one for you.
~Dale Evans




[edit on 26-6-2009 by ofhumandescent]

reply to post by ofhumandescent


You were lucky to have had her in your life!! That was beautiful and thank you for sharing it!

Someone said that they have a best friend and that they never argue.

I would just like to say to that, that not arguing isnt what having a good friend is all about.

I have a best friend and he and i argue quite a bit. We've had throw-down, bare-all fights. There are times when i dont like him very much and he doesnt like me very much. You know why? Because a true friend will disagree with you, a true friend will tell you when you're wrong, a true friend should be just that; true. Honest. I value what he says because i know he wouldn't lie to me. Sometimes i dont like what he has to say, but i take it to heart. And vice-versa. He doesnt always like what i have to say but he trusts me.

Being a friend sometimes means having to say the hard things. Example: I was married. Not getting into it, but he wasnt a good guy. Everyone liked him tho, hes a very superficially "good" person (behind closed doors is when things get bad). When he started cheating on me (with all of my "friends"), no one told me. No one "wanted to get involved" or to "hurt my feelings". Except my best friend. He told me straight up that he didnt like my husband, didnt trust him, and suspected that he was cheating on me. Now, i didnt believe him, i thought he was just being jealous or whatever. I got mad at him for a while but when the truth finally did surface, it turned out he was right all that time. I found out who my true friends were. A real friend WILL get involved, even if that means stepping on your toes.

Needless to say, i dont have many friends anymore. I had a learning experience, dont trust people much these days. Im jaded well beyond my years. But through all that, ive had a few people that remain close friends. The one in particular. He is the one person that i feel i will always be close with, hes the one person i trust no matter what. He's my protector. Im his voice of reason. We dont always get along but neither of us would question the other's loyalty.

And thats my 2cents, folks. ^-^

-Lady

You get the trust you deserve. You get the respect you earn.
my second line.

reply to post by nixie_nox

While I think to an extent that is true, is it not also true that some people are just takers and have no concept of giving of themselves? Example: I have a friend that I adore, when she is upset I comfort her, when she cries it makes me cry because I hate that she is hurting, but let me get upset and she hasn't got time or tells me to get over it... I understand that that is the way that she is, I accept that...it does upset me at times, but hey thats life! She is a taker...I am a giver...a nuturer...hence the dang zoo of orphaned animals that I have...

reply to post by Lady Lavish


I agree with you 100%! I am not sure how I missed this the first time! I am glad I came back to reread some of this!!