reply to post by Pandapple
I'm really sorry that things didn't work out as you had hoped.
You're suffering the same thing that happened to me - you hadn't had a chance to become disillusioned with the other person or the relationship.
It's sad that all the feelings of being in love are still intact and they have nowhere to go.
I used to try so hard to remind myself that it was all hormones and chemicals, but the relationship was magical to me and I could never understand why
it was so easy for the other person to just throw it away.
He used the line 'it's not you, it's me' and told me that I was too good for him. He was right as well. It was him trashing a beautiful
relationship and, without meaning to sound boastful, I was too good for him.
Harder to accept was the fact that he just didn't want to be bothered. Knowing that he could see how special things were and was still able to reject
it. It would have been easier if he hadn't given any indication of seeing what I could see.
On one level I think he got a sadistic pleasure out of hurting not just me, but himself as well. Or, it was almost as if he was trying to prove a
point to himself - that he could deny himself something that would have made him happy.
It was very cruel at the time but now, as I've been writing about it I have realised what a lucky escape I had. Imagine having to spend the rest of
your life with a person who had that sort of mentality
Really, if you can, write down all your ex's flaws and weaknesses. Do a complete hatchet job. Focus away from all the wonderful things that made you
so happy and do a really honest assessment. You might find that you wouldn't have been able to put up with him for much longer. (Never show what you
write to anyone else, though).
It's harsh, but keep up not texting or calling him. It wouldn't help your case. Have you other friends you can go out with?
I suffered for being a solitary person with nothing and no-one to take my mind off the pain. Don't let yourself get like that, find things to do.
I was so happy for you before, thinking that you might have been spared some of the heartache. I hope that coming here and being able to talk means
something to you and that it helps.
I haven't read my previous posts again, was it here that I said I wouldn't swap my dog for him, now? It's true - I wouldn't.
[edit on 16-7-2009 by berenike]